A neighbour one - ball noise

[tenlittlecygnets]

We have a basketball hoop in our drive, between our house and next door. Ds (13) has played with it three times. Today he had been out there 5 mins when NDN appeared and told him to stop, as the noise was going right through his house.

WWYD? We say hi to NDNs but no more than that. I think he is BU as it's better for kids to be outside than on screens.

I get that the noise of ball bouncing is annoying but it had literally been for 5 mins!! They are much noisier - ndn shouts at kids, his kids are younger, ndn does lots of DIY - but we suck it up as that's part of living next door to other people!!

So, thinking of compromise - we will get a lighter ball and ds won't play for hours, but am going to say, sorry, it's not unreasonable noise. What do you think? Also, would you be ok with ndn speaking to your ds instead of to you?

I think your neighbour is being unreasonable if this is occasional play. However, having lived next door to a previous neighbour whose DC played every day, several times a day, sometimes till 11 at night, the thud of the ball is extremely annoying and anti-social.

Let your child play OP. As long as it's not in the evening I don't see the issue. This is life!

I have misophonia and this is one of the worst noises for me but I know that's my problem. That noise would probably have me on the verge of tears but I would never have the cheek to ask someone to stop playing with a ball in their own garden he's doing nothing wrong.

My next door neighbour sometimes does keepy ups and kicks the ball of his bins which is really annoying but I am aware it's my problem.

I would say the difference is that DIY noise is something most people have to do to maintain a good standard of living. Some do more than others, but in the essence it is expected noise.

A ball bouncing repeatedly on the ground is someone choosing to do an activity they don’t have to do despite knowing it negatively impacts others in a significant way.

The larger parks round here all have BB hoops, in an enclosed area next to the tennis courts. Have a look in your local park. I hadn't spotted them until my DC got in to BB.

OP, you’ve got him a foam ball. Maybe go round and say “didn’t realise it was an issue, now got a softer ball so much quieter, we’ll make sure he doesn’t play for more than 30minutes at a time, and at reasonable hours”. That makes it clear he’s still going to be using the hoop, but not to a ridiculous extent. I can get that all-day-every-day would drive ndn to distraction, but that’s not what’s happening.