If your baby never ate sugar, when did you allow it?

[EscapingLondon]

I know some parents won't agree with this approach, so this question is really only for those who didn't feed their babies any sugar or nasties. When did these types of foods get introduced into their diet?

My baby is 11 months and grandparents want her to have a chocolate birthday cake with coloured icing etc for her 1st bday. Whilst it's fine I'm sure, and we will probably just go ahead, it made me think about when we start to feed her this stuff and why. Obviously there will come a time where we can't control it but at the moment she doesn't have a clue and she only really eats at home or with us anyway - so we may as well stay healthy.

If your baby ate really healthily, how and when did you start allowing unhealthy things?

We were strict about no processed sugar until 1. On his first birthday he had a very small piece of cake - probably about an inch square. He's 18 months now and has the occasional bit if I'm having something - a couple licks of an ice lolly, or a little piece broken off a biscuit. This is mostly because I started feeling like it was more important to model generosity and sharing than it was to keep him completely sugar free. (Obviously the same logic doesn't apply across the board... )
I found the advice at Kids Eat in Colour, about moderation, putting sugar on a pedestal etc quite helpful / reassuring.

Interesting. As I said, I was really only asking for the experience of those who follow this approach, and not the scorn of everyone else!

I have always only eaten fresh food and never eat anything processed, so baby does the same- it's what we have in our kitchen. No packets, jars or anything, and no sugary or baked products or sugary drinks - for myself and by extension for baby.

Yes baby will eat sugar at some point and will not be sold it as a treat for the reasons many have outlined. So just trying to work out when. At present whilst baby is still totally unaware it is unnecessary.

I actually don't eat cake either, it's not something I'm interested in, but thought that the spectacle might be nice for baby's first birthday.

@EarringsandLipstick I have made a few sugar free celebration cakes in my time, containing grated apple or banana etc or other fruits, and never needed sugar. They have also been mostly vegan and you can achieve light and fluffy results. Just takes a bit of thinking outside the box in terms of "how to make a cake".

I think DD was maybe... 18 months? Like others above I figured she wouldn't miss what she'd never had but that once she was a bit older there would be lots of it around so didn't see the point in giving it to her before then.

We don't really restrict 'treat' food loads. My DM had significant food issues and they really affected me - I was obsessed with sweets, crisps etc and I get quite upset if I feel hungry for a long time. It's not a healthy mindset and I really didn't want to pass that on to DD. And I don't think I have - she likes sweets and chocolate and crisps and all that kind of thing but she's very good about self regulation and doesn't demand treats all the time, so I'm ok with it all.

I made a pikelet stack with layers of whipped cream and berries for my daughter's first birthday breakfast. She was absolutely delighted with it and the photos my husband took of her demolishing it are just gorgeous! Our approach is to eat healthy, balanced meals at home so the occassion piece of cake or small milkshake (no syrup, just milk and a scoop of ice cream) with Grandma won't hurt. In the long run we plan to teach her about enjoying really beautiful unhealthy food in moderation, over cheap, easily accessible junk.

@ShutUpAlex

Always from weaning. Everything in moderation, I’ve never restricted anything. My daughter self regulates sugar intake way better than I do I was always restricted.

This. Although I think it was around his first birthday before he had chocolate buttons, my Dad wanted to be the one to administer them

I think you sound a bit over the top about avoiding sugar.

Sugar is not the devil if eaten in moderation. If you can avoid sugar at all costs you can also limit how much is consumed and allow occasional treats.

And give the kid a proper birthday cake! A slice of cake won't hurt

Ours always had no processed foods or added sugars at all until age 1, when they had some homemade chocolate birthday cake.

After that, we limited sugary treats like biscuits to going out, so in a cafe they could have a plain scone or similar. Till about 2.

They were allowed squash at their 2nd birthday party but after that, it's a party thing only, so in practice a few times a year. They only drink milk and water at home.

These days, we usually let them have a small sweet treat after lunch on the weekends, like a few buttons or bit of Easter egg or whatever. But never, ever hard boiled sweets or 'gummy' sweets like Haribo. Chocolate or home-made biscuits, cake etc.

IMO Haribo is pretty much the devil. DD1 is in Year 1 and went through a stage of coming home with little bags of it whenever it was someone's birthday. Her behaviour was routinely awful afterwards so we asked her not to eat it anymore and she now gets buttons instead. Our younger two have never eaten it at all.

Also severely limit dried fruit. It's stuff that sticks to or coats their teeth that worries me, like dried fruit, squash etc. Much more relaxed about chocolate and baked goods in moderation.

DS1 was nearly 2 before he had anything fancier than a rich tea biscuit. For his first birthday he did have cake but it was homemade and I made the coloured incing using blueberries.

DS2 was walking at 11m, so from after his 1st birthday he's pretty much pinched whatever his brother (5) is eating

OP do you think it's been easier to avoid these foods because of lockdown? Genuinely curious. We very much cool from scratch at home but had a busy social life when we had our first and found when out and about she ended up being offered biscuits etc by others or sometimes we were out longer than expected so it was a case of eating what was available. Agree with others we definitely don't do squash, raisins etc but don't worry do much about things like cake now, which she'll happily leave when she's had enough.

I think having your first refined sugar in a homemade birthday cake on your first birthday is practically obligatory, it's comparable to having a drink in a pub on your 18th birthday. And you don't need to open the floodgates after that, we certainly didn't with our 3DC. You'll find though that other people love giving your children sweeties and you end up never giving them any sugar at home to balance out the constant birthdays at nursery and school and treats from grandparents.

We don't have shop bought squash or biscuits or cake or sweets in the house, my rule is homemade cakes and biscuits only so we have them once or twice a month. Fruit juice at dinner only when I have wine (so weekends only). DS had a dairy allergy when younger so all the lovely cakes in cafes were not suitable for him so no-one was allowed one and now they don't look for it. But what they ate at social events was not policed so they all eat plenty of birthday cake and sweets. My DDs are teenagers and one makes her Christmas or Easter chocolate last months whereas the other eats it all in a matter of days, neither are overweight and seem to self regulate reasonably successfully although they all like sweet things. But I think it's easier to self regulate at the supermarket by not buying junk and best to not make a fuss about sugar for birthday parties, social events or at the grandparents. It's not worth the hassle and models an anxiety about food that isn't good for children. Better for them to just know different foods are available at different places.

I didn't allow sugar in terms of chocolate, sweets, store bought biscuits, juice etc until school age. Even then it was juice only when out/at friends and no fizzy drinks. I'll relax the fizzy drink rule when out as they get a bit older. They now eat chocolate/sweets at parties, have an ice cream on a day out and at special times (birthdays, Christmas, Easter).

However, I did allow anything home baked from weaning, I mainly stuck to low sugar or fruity recipes but did include them if I made a Victoria sponge cake or a brownie. My reasoning was I knew exactly what was in it and I baked only occasionally so it really was a treat.

@EscapingLondon if baby is still unaware just keep going, your hand will be forced as they get older!

The kids that are denied sugar are usually the ones that go mad for it when they get a chance!

People always say this but I'm not sure how true it is. DD wasn't given a lot, I was very careful. Her best friend's father eats horribly and gave her sugar from very little. She now (at 11) sees sugar as 'normal' to the point of drinking sugary soft drinks with her breakfast and a lot of junk, white carbs. She is quite overweight. Now they also avoid vegetables and his comment about me eating a carrot at his DD's 4th birthday was 'yuk'. So there are a lot of food issues there. But my DD likes sweets and chocolate but doesn't like extremely processed drinks and overly sweet things. She'll spit out crappy sweets. And she loves fruit and vegetables.

I think it's mostly luck. But to say people that allow sweets have children that don't care is not true.

Breast milk is 7% sugar fyi

I know it's not what you're asking but sugars are not simply 'bad'.

Why do people keep bringing up breast milk when op is obviously talking about refined sugars?? Do you not know the difference?

My lo's first sugar was at toddler group :-/

I didn't give my son anything with refined sugar in it before his first birthday. I offered him some birthday cake and he didn't want it because he didn't know what it was.

He's 2.5 now and I'm still careful with what I give him, chocolate is allowed but a weekend treat (and in an appropriate quantity for such a little body) rather than an everyday thing.

I also do an excellent line in sugar free baby led weaning cakes which he enjoys.

I definitely find that sugar impacts his behaviour negatively - we made his grandad a birthday cake last month and he helped 'clean out' the bowl (best bit of baking 😂). His behaviour was attrocious for the rest of the afternoon.

We had a homemade cake with lots of whipped cream for DD's birthday, she had 1/2 of a normal slice I think.

I think a tablespoon full may have made it into her, the rest was smeared on her face.

I think proper chocolate came at Christmas when she was 18 months.

I. bake a lot and started baking. with DD when she was around 15 months as a nice way to spend time. i had a toddler baking book which had recipes with reduced sugar and we often took. things with us when we were out in the afternoon to help with hangry moodiness, especially when she. started properly walking and needing energy stores refilled.

But I cook mostly from scratch, she had hardly any kiddi-snacks or sugary cereals, lots of plain. joghurt or porridge with fresh fruit.

In my opinion there is no forbidden or bad food, it all depends on the amount and what else you eat.

Mine are 7 and 10 now but I was really strict about sugar but still let them have a bit of home made first birthday cake. I fed them the so called healthy goodies snacks (actually are probably bad for you) and steered clear of Haribo, desserts and giving ds1 proper crisps (more relaxed about ds2).

Anyway am still fairly controlling about sugar. I don't like them having sweets or desserts all the time.

It has backfired. My dc are sweetie fiends. They get what they can off friends. Other children are given so much sugar and share it. Ds1 buys sweets on the way home and hides the wrappers. Grandma gives sweets and chocs for Christmas and Easter. I try and stop them from destroying it all but it just gets snaffled. They are awful.

So be careful. You need to create a healthy attitude to sweets.

@MaryMashedThem
Thank you for mentioning Kids Eat in Color. I've just read a few articles on the website and they are so helpful. On the sugar issue:
kidseatincolor.com/19-tips-for-managing-sugar/

Precious first born, we avoided sugar for ages, bought the baby biscuits sweetened with grape juice etc. I remember being shocked when we visited a friend with a 3 year old when my dd1 was 2 and she was given a malted milk!

Third child though had regular biscuits from well before 1!

Even dd1 had a cake for first birthday though but probably hardly ate any, it was mostly for the adult family members.

I was never precious about not giving sugar - if family members were keen to treat DS with some biscuits or cake or chocolate I was happy with that - but I never went out my way to get him any until he was about 1 and a half r 2 because I suppose I didn’t see the point, if I gave him a grape instead of a biscuit he was none the wiser 🤷‍♀️ once he was older and could appreciate the concept of a treat I started giving him more.

I avoided all added sugar when mine was a baby, including juices and fruity snacks specifically marketed at babies and toddlers as they were often hideously sweet, even the no added sugar ones. Fruit juices were watered down drastically, we never had fizzy drinks and yogurts were plain with added fruit chopped up. We also tended towards more savoury foods in general and didn’t really do puddings. I guess I was just trying to steer her palate away from developing an excessively sweet tooth to the detriment of everything else. We did do the odd ice cream from a local gelateria where they made their own (we are in Italy) and for her first birthday we got an ice cream cake, but it was literally a couple of spoonfuls.

It seems to have worked as DD prefers savoury over sweet, she likes chocolate but prefers 70% plain to milk chocolate, sweets get forgotten about in cupboards and she has been known to leave the odd cake for me to eat at birthday parties because it was too sweet.

It suppose it also helped that in childcare settings and school the dinners are 2 courses but no pudding (so no culture of a sweet fix after your meal) and in nurseries here they have a no chocolate rule for under 3s. That said, many kids have grown up on Kinder and Ferrero products as they are marketed as “nutritious” here but I deliberately steered her away from all that as long as I had influence in what she ate.

It just generally annoys me how much shite is made for and marketed at young children so that Big Food can get them hooked on processed crap and not real food and most of it is extreme sugary, so I avoided as much as possible without outright “banning”.

My aunt didn’t let my cousins have any sugar, this was years ago when we were all DC, they’d go mad at parties, go on a frenzy eating everything. I
remember thinking it all very odd. One of them got into trouble at school when he stole money to buy sweets.

When they saw their grandparents for the first time, chocolate buttons! None of us need treats but they are fine as part of a balanced diet

@MrsTerryPratchett

The kids that are denied sugar are usually the ones that go mad for it when they get a chance!

People always say this but I'm not sure how true it is. DD wasn't given a lot, I was very careful. Her best friend's father eats horribly and gave her sugar from very little. She now (at 11) sees sugar as 'normal' to the point of drinking sugary soft drinks with her breakfast and a lot of junk, white carbs. She is quite overweight. Now they also avoid vegetables and his comment about me eating a carrot at his DD's 4th birthday was 'yuk'. So there are a lot of food issues there. But my DD likes sweets and chocolate but doesn't like extremely processed drinks and overly sweet things. She'll spit out crappy sweets. And she loves fruit and vegetables.

I think it's mostly luck. But to say people that allow sweets have children that don't care is not true.

Agree with this. My nieces and nephews were allowed unlimited sugary snacks as soon as they were weaned practically and all 3 used to go mad a parties, once hoovering up all the smarties from the top of another child’s birthday cake. If anything they’ve got worse as teens as they simply avoid anything even vaguely healthy.

I was also brought up with a parent who was strict on sugar as worried about teeth more than anything, i never gorged on sweets or ate all the cakes at birthday parties. It’s a bit of a myth, usually repeated by people who didn’t opt to restrict sugar.