Muslim neighbour bought food over for Eid. Do I give something back?

[theonlywayisup33]

Last week, a lovely neighbour celebrating Eid bought over some gorgeous curry and dessert dishes. Just in take away plastic boxes. I went over the next day and thanked but she looked a bit sad. Not sure if it was something else going on with her or should I give something back to her? Like a gift or even the plastic boxes (kinda not ones people usually give back though, I think).
So any Muslim MNers who could advise?

It depends on her culture. It’s customary to give return gifts in some muslim cultures, even if it’s a box of chocolates. But as it’s been over a week and you thanked her already, just return the favour with some cake when you have a celebratory event.

How lovely of your neighbour.

Regardless of them being Muslim or it being Eid, I'd have given a neighbour who did this some flowers or a plant or sweets/chocolate as a thank you.

I don't know any Muslims who give to receive tbh and especially not if they're giving to non Muslims.

If you celebrate Christmas, count her in on that or if you don't want to wait that long, buy her some flowers or something.

Take her some mince pies at Xmas or a cake when it's your birthday.

I think approach this like you would any neighbour - “hey are you ok? Anything I can help with?”.

I don’t think you’ve made any cultural faux pas, sharing on eid is to share the festivities not as reciprocal gift giving.

Having said that, some people I’ve met do return the boxes with food in it.

Agree with @GrumpyHoonMain that you can just take a bit of cake over or something when you have a celebration

And also with @WorraLiberty that Muslims don't give to receive, so I doubt that she was looking sad because you hadn't brought her anything.

The 2nd Eid of the year is approx 19th July FYI so you may be in the same boat again then

When this happened to us (lovely neighbours bought us food at eid) I gave some sparkiling grape juice a week or two later in a fancy bottle and a little note thanking them and hoped they had had a very happy time celebrating. I was particularly thankful because I was bf a baby, supervising a toddler and trying to wfh so dinner arriving really did feel like a gift from heaven!

When Ive visited people in Muslim countries I usually took something like chocolates or fancy biscuits which were recieved with smiles.

I don’t think she was upset because you didn’t give something back, it’s probably something that has happened. Having said that it would be a nice gesture to give something on another occasion.

@memberofthewedding

When Ive visited people in Muslim countries I usually took something like chocolates or fancy biscuits which were recieved with smiles.

But if you're actually visiting someone that's customary in most countries.

My colleagues all celebrated Eid and included me in their breaking of the fast all through Ramadan.

I missed Eid itself because I’m an idiot, so the next day I baked a load of stuff and brought it in. That was just a small Thankyou for them sharing with me throughout Ramadan.

If it had been a one off I probably wouldn’t have reciprocated without it being a special occasion

They didn’t return my plastic pots either so I wouldn’t worry so much about that side of it.

I think she may have been down about something else, we don't tend to give to receive on Eid - obviously when we visit family and friends etc we end up receiving as well but giving to our neighbours is just out of neighbourly love :) we gave food to our neighbours over the last 10 nights and 100% didn't expect anything back.

Maybe she did want her containers back.

Personal experience- we don't give to receive, also the fact that it was in takeaway type plastic containers means she doesn't want them back. Most likely something else will have been going on x

A Muslim friend of mine never gives Tupperware back without something in it, it’s unlucky he says... that might just be him though!

@Shahlalala

A Muslim friend of mine never gives Tupperware back without something in it, it’s unlucky he says... that might just be him though!

Haha! My Irish mum would never gift anyone a new purse without putting at least a coin in it, as she thought that was bad luck

OK great, thanks everyone. We do give their children treats at Christmas.
Will not worry about the plastic containers.

I normally gift food in disposable containers specifically so neighbours don't have to worry about sending something in return. I did that throughout Ramadan for our recently widowed neighbour as well and do the same for other Muslim and non Muslim friends and neighbours.

I’d take the boxes back, my partners family are Muslim, and like most Asian families they are very generous giving out food to family & neighbours so they will definitely use those containers again. They often give me food in washed out yoghurt / ice cream tubs etc.

I specifically keep washed out yoghurt tubs for this purpose!