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Original poster

Has anyone received help for maladaptive daydreaming?

34 replies

LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 20:50

I've finally figured out what's wrong with me. Can't work out whether to tell my gp or not, as seems to be a byproduct which gets worse when feeling low. I know it's not very well known about but I wonder if that would change my treatment plan from my gp (have been offered ssri antidepressants). It's a big part of why I have limited appetite and ability to sleep.

I'm so nervous and also very embarrassed about the whole thing.

Do ssri help with this? Any experience?

OP posts:
Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 20:51

Fwiw mine are centred very much on a film or book I have read but very obsessive about that particular one. I am very aware of what I'm doing but feel a sense of loss if not doing it and struggle to get by every day life without.

I have a happy and normal marriage and everything so all very strange.

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EscapeTheCastle · 13/05/2021 21:03

I'm not well informed on this subject but reading about it here on MN I always feel that maybe it's an expression creativity.

I'm sure you are a very creative person and you are unable to express it currently. You keep it all in your head instead.

Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 21:07

@EscapeTheCastle

I'm not well informed on this subject but reading about it here on MN I always feel that maybe it's an expression creativity.

I'm sure you are a very creative person and you are unable to express it currently. You keep it all in your head instead.

This is really interesting. I am quite creative and often struggle to express it but am trying to do that more. I wonder how common it is as I have often felt very alone. Only on mumsnet did I first work out what it was.
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BeanandBall · 13/05/2021 21:18

I do this.
I also have quite significant anxiety and associated blood pressure issues.
My GP referred me for online counselling type thing and an online course to do. I took up exercise at the same time and found the exercise much better for me. He also prescribed Sertraline but I read the list of side affects and how you cannot just stop taking it and decided against it for me.
In terms of the maladaptive day dreaming, I highly doubt many GPs will have heard of it and they'll be wrong footed into assuming you've Googled, diagnosed yourself with something and will likely react to it. And they'll just prescribe you Sertraline anyway.
I agree with the poster above,who has hit the nail on the head. I have huge amounts of creative desire within me and very very little opportunity to release this. (There are definitely other issues but this is key for me). I suppose I need to focus more on releasing, unclenching and doing something.

Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 21:21

@BeanandBall

I do this. I also have quite significant anxiety and associated blood pressure issues. My GP referred me for online counselling type thing and an online course to do. I took up exercise at the same time and found the exercise much better for me. He also prescribed Sertraline but I read the list of side affects and how you cannot just stop taking it and decided against it for me. In terms of the maladaptive day dreaming, I highly doubt many GPs will have heard of it and they'll be wrong footed into assuming you've Googled, diagnosed yourself with something and will likely react to it. And they'll just prescribe you Sertraline anyway. I agree with the poster above,who has hit the nail on the head. I have huge amounts of creative desire within me and very very little opportunity to release this. (There are definitely other issues but this is key for me). I suppose I need to focus more on releasing, unclenching and doing something.
I feel like it is a product of loneliness. I have taken ssri before and they really are quite easy to stop (you just need to do it slowly over a few weeks). I wonder if my mood improvement will reduce them. I will let you know.

I hope your anxiety improves and you find a way to be creative.

OP posts:
lavenderlove · 13/05/2021 21:43

Hi, I'm pretty sure I have this. I also think my DC has it but I'm not sure if it effects children. It's not something I would want to take medication for though and I can't think what would help it? What kind of treatment would you be looking for op?

Out of interest does it make you feel like time is passing by much quicker for you than anyone else? Hours feel like minutes sometimes for me.

FoxyTheFox · 13/05/2021 21:45

I'm a maladaptive daydreamer, , developed in childhood as a coping mechanism and I still use it as such. I go and lie on the bed for 30 minutes to have a daydream in the same way that most people would go have a nap and I find it just as relaxing, it helps me get my stress levels down. I frequently use it to help myself fall asleep too. I have ground rules that I set for myself which are that I don't do it when I'm supposed to be mentally present, if I do it during the day then I set an alarm so I don't spend too much time on it (to use the nap comparison again, just like going to for a midday sleep), and I don't cancel plans or put off jobs in order to daydream instead as real life takes priority. Other than that, I crack on with it. I enjoy it and it harms no one, I have several long running worlds that I dip in and out of depending on what I'm in the mood for and what particular scenario(s) I need to help reset my brain, I sometimes have standalone ones too. Basically it doesn't have to be problematic.

Belindabelle · 13/05/2021 21:56

I too have done this from childhood. I honestly see it as an asset and not something I would ever want to stop. It’s just part of who I am.

BeanandBall · 13/05/2021 21:58

Yes loneliness is almost certainly a factor too, fair point.

Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 22:06

@lavenderlove

Hi, I'm pretty sure I have this. I also think my DC has it but I'm not sure if it effects children. It's not something I would want to take medication for though and I can't think what would help it? What kind of treatment would you be looking for op?

Out of interest does it make you feel like time is passing by much quicker for you than anyone else? Hours feel like minutes sometimes for me.

I had it a lot as a teenager and it didn't make me feel great as I was missing out or normal social things to live in another world.

I find I'm piggybacking off other ideas e.g. making new episodes of a much loved show. I want to be creating new things (and I'm starting to, but my obsession is the former).

My issue is that it's topping me from sleeping and eating frequently. I also want to be able to harness it properly.

OP posts:
Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 22:07

@FoxyTheFox

I'm a maladaptive daydreamer, , developed in childhood as a coping mechanism and I still use it as such. I go and lie on the bed for 30 minutes to have a daydream in the same way that most people would go have a nap and I find it just as relaxing, it helps me get my stress levels down. I frequently use it to help myself fall asleep too. I have ground rules that I set for myself which are that I don't do it when I'm supposed to be mentally present, if I do it during the day then I set an alarm so I don't spend too much time on it (to use the nap comparison again, just like going to for a midday sleep), and I don't cancel plans or put off jobs in order to daydream instead as real life takes priority. Other than that, I crack on with it. I enjoy it and it harms no one, I have several long running worlds that I dip in and out of depending on what I'm in the mood for and what particular scenario(s) I need to help reset my brain, I sometimes have standalone ones too. Basically it doesn't have to be problematic.
It used to help me get to sleep but now keeps me awake!
OP posts:
Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 13/05/2021 22:09

Any recommended support groups or forums?

OP posts:
ZoeMaye · 13/05/2021 22:13

Mine has got so much better since I am happier in my life and spending my time (both at work and home) doing much make creative things. I still daydream a lot but it is not so maladaptive.

Twizbe · 13/05/2021 22:15

I'd never heard of this until now. Just went and googled it and wow ... this is interesting.

I daydream a lot. Always have. Now I mostly do it when walking somewhere. The most common one is having a chat over coffee with an old colleague I don't see anymore.

I don't think it interferes with life really, just passes the time while I walk

EscapeTheCastle · 13/05/2021 22:32

Op. Creative kick-start for you. Open a notebook tomorrow. Write out the things that you enjoy from the film you usually focus on. Setting. Character.
These might be the themes you could pursue in your writing, art, poetry, photography.
You could start with an illustrated art journal. You tube have examples to look at.
No fancy equipment required.
I really want to encourage you do get scribbling because its so therapeutic.
Meanwhile though, those extended elaborate daydreams are not a bad thing necessarily. But if you are feeling somewhat stifled by them then it might be time to try something new.

Original poster
LetticeAndromeda · 14/05/2021 10:15

I love this thread, thank you. I am carving time in my day to write now. I am having a bit of an epiphany! It's difficult with a toddler but I'm trying.

OP posts:
randomlyLostInWales · 14/05/2021 11:02

Note books and campfire might be worth a try.

Are you sure you don't have a sleep problem and are blaming the maladaptive day dreaming ?- it's just never kept me awake.

It could be the time with toddler isn't very stimulating- I found it easier to be out and about with them interact with world other people and them as well - but with covid many groups aren't running and it's all harder.

Stompythedinosaur · 14/05/2021 12:49

Sadly maladaptive daydreaming isn't an "official" diagnosis in the UK at present. It isn't in the DSM. So while a doctor should take your symptoms seriously they won't diagnose this.

Maladaptive daydreaming is a trauma symptom, and trauma work (e.g. trauma focused CBT, EMDR) should help.

mogtheexcellent · 14/05/2021 12:58

I do this and I think my 6yo DD does.

I haven't considered getting help for it. I've just learnt to adapt around it and I'm teaching DD how to use an internal pause button.

My long daydream is me living by a lake. That's it. ConfusedBlush

imgoingtoregretthis · 14/05/2021 13:01

I don't want to do the typical MN thing, but ok I will as my DS does this and I do a bit too ( certainly to get to sleep) Often these days I'm in a documentary or being interviews as some kind of expert of parenting ( this is very funny Grinas I'm not good at all at parenting.)

The school suspects DS has a type of autism called PDA, he acts out fantasy to avoid doing things. I do it to avoid boredom, which he also does. He's going to be assessed shortly, it doesn't present with all the classic autistic traits you would of heard of, so I imagine harder to diagnose. For DS it's preventing him getting his school work done, well it's not preventing it, but he's doing it instead of doing his school work and is hard to snap out of his fantasy.

imgoingtoregretthis · 14/05/2021 13:36

@BlankTimes do you think this maladaptive daydreaming is really PDA? I've never heard of it before today, but due to DS clicked and thought ah 💡

imgoingtoregretthis · 14/05/2021 13:38

This one is handy

www.pdasociety.org.uk

BlankTimes · 14/05/2021 14:06

@imgoingtoregretthis I'm sorry, I have absolutely no idea apart from some of the symptoms seem similar.

The trouble with diagnosing anything on the autistic spectrum is that each autistic person has a unique set of traits, not all of the traits that encompass autism, so each persons symptoms and reactions to everyday life can be markedly different and a lot of the time people wonder how two entirely different presentations can have the same diagnosis.

Add to that, that maladaptive daydreaming is not officially diagnosed in the UK, and you have a whole can of questions, without any likely satisfactory answers.

The reason I linked to the PDA info wasn't to suggest an autism link per se, but to suggest that IF any of the strategies for aiding PDA are helpful for maladaptive daydreaming, by all means implement them and see if they work.

Many neurodiverse conditions overlap and techniques for say Dyspraxia can also be useful when applied to SOME aspects of autism presentation.

Rather than being too concerned about what name a certain presentation of behaviours has and only looking for interventions for that condition, sometimes as parents it's helpful to look elsewhere for interventions that may help and implement the ones that do, whilst waiting for the professionals to come up with a name for it.

cReateAusername · 14/05/2021 14:08

I do this, I dont feel it’s a problem so have never had any other input regarding it as it’s just part of who I am

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