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Does anyone else just sometimes feel like they’ve had enough?

1 reply

dameofdilemma · 11/05/2021 20:30

Had enough of being the one who makes a healthy meal while Dp buys pizza.
Had enough of being the one who organises days out for dd, play dates etc. While Dp organises sitting in front of the tv.

Had enough of being the one who chivvies dd along to do something active or try out activities. While Dp takes her on the same boring walk/cycle to the same boring park. For 45 mins.

Had enough of being the one who has to make time to make dinner for dd, whether I’m snowed with work or not, while Dp gets to choose to do it when it’s convenient for him.
Yes I could just not do it and dd could just stay hungry and eat at 8pm but she’s 8 years old and that feels unfair on her.

Dp is intelligent, active and has plenty of enthusiasm for things - but only things that directly benefit him. He can naval gaze about his career development all day long.
Everything else gets a do minimum/path of least resistance approach.

Dd is aware of this and maximises on it to push every screen time, chocolate etc boundary.

Dp and I both work and earn a similar amount. I have no more free time than he does.
I guess the last year has really shone a glaring light on everything as we’re both working from home (and guess who dealt with home schooling).
This isn’t about house work, that’s shared. It’s about responsible, accountable, reliable parenting.

Last weekend I’d had enough. I spent most of the weekend having a lovely time with friends.
Dd ate pizza for dinner both nights. She spent most of Saturday in her PJs in her room alone and then watched tv.
Didn’t do her piano practice properly (and then was upset as she struggled with her lesson). And forgot to do her maths.

So yes I had a lovely weekend but feel guilty now and know it’s not a long term solution for her to spend half her weekends like this.

Just needed a moan as it’s really getting me down. Dp was the one who wanted a child and he seems to have lost interest in being a parent. I’m really disappointed in him.
I’ve tried talking to him about but he gets defensive, says he does his share and I’m just complaining because he doesn’t do it the same way I do.
But he behaves like an ad hoc babysitter rather than a parent and it’s really pissing me off.

Rant over. Just had to get it off my chest.

OP posts:
HomicidalPsychoJungleCat · 11/05/2021 20:33

Yep, so much so that dh is now an ex. Its worse when you're separated and they constantly prioritise new girlfriend over kids and are still lazy shits in every other respect. I wish i’d never got married.

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