Woman scammed of £113,000

[Blueberrywhirl320]

I read this article in the paper today about a 50 year old British woman who's been scammed out of £113,000 from an online love from Ukraine, someone who she never met.
How is it possible for people still to fall for scams like this in 2021 when there's been numerous of programmes on the TV about it, newspaper reports. I honestly don't get how you can send a stranger who you've never met money or your bank details.

Loads of otherwise sensible people put money into the Elon musk bitcoin scam

Also all the people (usually men) who give tonnes of money to camgirls etc who they seem to believe are in love with them...

It's about tapping into hope in the main, or fear.

I think there's a thing with men being pursued to send film of themselves on the promise of something in return and then get blackmailed.

Those ones are less reported I'm sure and even if they do report to the police unlikely to tell the media about it.

Every single day on here there are threads written by attention seekers who know exactly what tone to use and which topics to touch on to get mass engagement, even when their stories are farcically unlikely.

People get invested, then take offence if its suggested that the poster may not be genuine. They've given their time and emotions and they want to trust that investment.

It's no stretch at all to think that a lonely person could be manipulated to give much more than they can afford by someone who knows how to do it.

That’s interesting about deliberate mis-spelling, @SionnachRua.

I’ve often said to those people who like to claim that spelling doesn’t matter any more, that at least it should help you to weed out scams.

The was an article in the daily fail a while back where reporter went undercover as a victim to see how these scammers worked. It was an interesting read and even though she was playing them along, she even felt real feelings of guilt at times. It was quite eye opening

It's really not as simple as the people getting scammed are stupid as a PP said.

The scammers are experts in tricking people, gaining trust etc. They don't just send a couple of messages and then ask for money.

It's in a similar vein to asking 'why do people not leave abusive relationships in the early days' etc. There's way more too it than people just 'being blind'.

When I was off sick and watching daytime TV I saw a program with Kym Marsh where they 'investigate' these cases. The scams are invariably almost laughably shit but obviously prey on vulnerable people who are desperate for love and don't know how the internet works so just trust everything they see.

Apparently one technique they use is to harvest photos and videos from influencers' Instagram / YouTube accounts. To stage a video call, they play a talking head type video and speak over it, saying that the connection is bad to cover up for the fact that it's completely out of sync. (Nevermind that the facial expressions don't match at all and the accent is suspiciously wrong.) It's so ridiculously transparent but I guess a certain kind of person just thinks anything on the internet is real. There's probably an element of wanting to believe that this attractive person is actually into them too, especially as the target is often lonely and isolated.

@MissHoney85 I have been watching the Lym Marsh programme too. It's astonishing and heart breaking at the same time.

I went on a year long training course once, run by the most amazing woman - she was intelligent, articulate, and incredibly passionate about her vocation. I later read about her in the local newspaper - she'd got divorced, and had been scammed for all of her savings by someone in Nigeria claiming to be her soulmate. It was around £85k, and she still had two teenage children at home. I just couldn't understand how on earth it could have happened to someone like her who seemed so savvy.

But she was human, and vulnerable.

If you can spot the scam, you're not the 'mark'. These scammers are very good at grooming people.

Very sophisticated use of language and manipulation techniques.

Don't assume it can't happen to you, because you are smart and savvy.

Interesting radio 4 programme, word of mouth, I think.

@NiceGerbil

I think there's a thing with men being pursued to send film of themselves on the promise of something in return and then get blackmailed.

Those ones are less reported I'm sure and even if they do report to the police unlikely to tell the media about it.

That's called sextortion afaik.

@NiceGerbil

The scammers are very very good.

I know it's a worn phrase but the focus on the victim is wrong. Why did she fall for it etc.

Some people are vulnerable gullible desperate etc.

And the scammers are professional criminals.

Everyone says I can't believe I got tricked like this.

I've not been caught but I know more than one person who has. People who I know are clever, conscientious etc.

One was an HMRC scam, my friend was a successful small business owner.

The other was my dad, I'm not supposed to know as he's mortified. His was minor- a site charging for new EU health card which is free through the proper site. The women lost about 7k.

Never say never. In short.

Not necessarily. As a young teen I knew quite a few. Most of them were under 20, around half of them high school drop outs, working in internet cafes.

Easily done. Most people would fall for a scam that tugged the right string.

I've worked with very bright, successful and capable scam victims who have lost huge sums of money. Trust me, some of these scammers are more manipulative than you can imagine.

This is one of the very few crimes where it seems acceptable for people to blame the victims. and question their intelligence. I'd urge people to have a bit more compassion and understand that many factors are at play in cases like this.

It is very interesting subject as to how these people can be scammed. It's not unusual for victims to not tell their friends and family that they're sending money to some internet random which suggests to me that part of them knows it isn't right but they don't want to give up the fantasy.

I remember a documentary about a man who was scammed. I did feel sorry for him as it was clear he was desperately lonely. He was in his late 50's I think but 'old' for his age. He 'met' a lady on a dating site who claimed to be a Nigerian nurse in her 30's. The photo was a perfectly reasonable photo of an attractive woman They chat and she says she'd like to come to England and work as a nurse but can't afford the air fare. He sends her the air fare. She then says she needs a further £3000 as she won't be allowed in the country without showing she has means to support herself so he sends her that too. He sends her lots of other amounts for various reasons too.

He goes to the airport with his bouquet of flowers and of course she's a no show. Eventually after 5 hours the airline staff take pity on him and tell him no one that name was booked on the flight.

He hears nothing for a week when she recontacts him claiming she'd been arrested at the airport because of the £3000 she was carrying (can't remember why that was allegedly a problem). They continue talking and then she asks him to help her father who has smuggled some money out of Nigeria. He ends up flying to Ireland and meets some man in a hotel who carries out a 'red money scam' on him and he loses £20000. (Red money scam - con artist claims in order to smuggle cash out of originating country it had to be dyed red. They need money to buy some liquid that will remove the dye. Claim they can't afford the cost of this liquid and need the mark to buy it. Claim they have £100000 in red money and if the mark buys the liquid they will give them £30000 (or whatever) for their trouble. Obviously the liquid is v expensive (in this case £20000). There's usually a magic trick involved where the conman shows a red note being turned into a £20 note or whatever.

Now I can understand being sucked in by the first one to a certain extent but when you've already lost about £10000 wouldn't you just have run for the hills? I think there is a lot to be said that these people are so desperate for a relationship that they ignore the clear signs that it's a scam.

I saw a story about one lady and it really hit home.
Unexpectedly bereaved, rough times, hobby is photography so joined some hobby site. Groomed for ages in a platonic way.
Conned out of her husbands estate eventually.

The first thing people recommend when you are trying to get back to life is a hobby.
She didn't, and shouldn't expect that.

Because they are extremely clever patient people they find out their prays weaknesses and pounce. It's often a long drawn out process too and not all of the money in one go... oh can you lend me equivalent to £50 I need food... oh do you have £100 etc. People see others as being scammed but not assume it would happen to them.

Actually often it's not actually one person doing the scam It can be a whole gang of them. It becomes clear when the standard of English fluctuates throughout contact or they ask you questions which you've already answered days ago.

You’d have to be a clinical moron to give 100k to an effective stranger, let alone one that anyone with half a brain cell would realise isn’t likely to be genuinely romantically interested in a million years.

Grooming aside, it’s just utter stupidity!

@littlepieces

I've worked with very bright, successful and capable scam victims who have lost huge sums of money. Trust me, some of these scammers are more manipulative than you can imagine.

This is one of the very few crimes where it seems acceptable for people to blame the victims. and question their intelligence. I'd urge people to have a bit more compassion and understand that many factors are at play in cases like this.

i think we all need to read this, and try to understand it. it's so easy to feel superior, in a false sense of being invincible.

@picklemewalnuts

Very sophisticated use of language and manipulation techniques.

Don't assume it can't happen to you, because you are smart and savvy.

Well it wouldnt happen to me as I am skint as fuck, they can woo me for as long as they want, I could probably scrape £50 at the most but that would be it. Sadly I don’t have thousands tucked away.

@picklemewalnuts

Very sophisticated use of language and manipulation techniques.

Don't assume it can't happen to you, because you are smart and savvy.

The reassuring thing is it literally cannot happen to you unless you are prepared to send cash to a stranger.

In the same way that the bank scams can’t happen to you if you know never to give anyone your pin, not to transfer funds because someone phones you and tells you you must urgently. Etc.

Which isn’t to be unsympathetic to people who are lonely enough to fall for X or distracted enough to fall for Y, but it means if you follow common sense rules, you can avoid being ripped off.

I do think there is an issue with generations who are too old to receive internet safety training at school and too trusting to have worked it out for themselves.