Caught my husband watching porn

[Sonmom26]

I recently caught my husband watching porn the other day. I know some people are okay with their partner doing this but I had told him previously how much he would hurt me if he did that and he continued to do it behind my back. I’m so hurt because I literally begged him to lay with me and instead he went downstairs and did this. He told me he just opened it and scrolled because he was bored and called it entertainment after he couldn’t find anything else to read. He also said he doesn’t find them attractive it’s just physical and disassociated the emotional aspect. I’m literally so lost I feel worthless and depressed like I’m falling into a deep hole I’m unsure of what to do about this I feel like he has no respect for me I barely want to look at him.

@TopBlogger "Porn is nothing to do with sex - it is about power and abuse."

Where you getting this from?! It might be about that sometimes but it certainly isn't all the time. I watch porn and I can assure you for me it's about sex and certainly not power and abuse! It's a quick way to get my rocks off to put it bluntly. And again to be blunt sex with someone you love and getting off to porn don't perform the same function. One is about connection and physicality and intimacy and pleasure (but takes relatively significant effort) and the other is something an individual does/watches for short term enjoyment worth zero investment.

@pigglepot I completely agree

@Moonmelodies

Aren't people entitled to decline sex (or laying down) these days, whatever the reason, without fear of consequences?

I’ve come to expect the bullshit on porn threads here, but this one is really taking the biscuit.

Nobody is saying her partner should have been forced to have sex with her.

They are saying that there is a problem with someone who routinely avoids intimacy with their partner and rejects it in favour of looking at porn.

There is plenty of research into the effect of porn on the brain, and the impact being similar to certain drugs, and plenty of reports of those using porn excessively becoming increasingly disinterested in actual physical intimacy.

It's a quick way to get my rocks off to put it bluntly.
Well as long as you’re getting your rocks off, nothing else matters, eh?

There was a post on here a couple of weeks back. Quite a lot of women said they know their DH don't watch it. I wonder how many have since found out they do. I'd say quite a few.

He is not good enough for you in any way. Ditch.

Personally I would feel same as OP and porn is a boundary for me. It’s ok to have boundaries and not be comfortable with: porn, camming, strip clubs, open relationship. If DH wanted to partake in these things, we would no longer be compatible with each other. He knows what I think and I would consider it cheating. I realise other people have different boundaries though.

@RevolvingPivot

There was a post on here a couple of weeks back. Quite a lot of women said they know their DH don't watch it. I wonder how many have since found out they do. I'd say quite a few.

Given how many women have a moral objection to porn, is it really so impossible to believe that men exist who can prioritise their morals over an orgasm? You have a very low opinion of men as a whole.

Porn is nothing to do with sex - it is about power and abuse. If you are not ok with this and he knows this, then his wants have outweighed your feelings. And they always will. Porn corrupts relationships, distorts sex and people never fully recover from watching it. Unlike other forms of addiction, the mind can never get rid of those images.

@TopBlogger hysterical much? Why are you talking such nonsense????

I have on occasion watched porn and it hasn’t corrupted any relationship I’ve been in, nor has it distorted sex and I have no need to recover from watching it.

The issue for the op doesn’t seem to be her partner watching porn although that may be something she dislikes him doing but more the other things she has said about him having no interest in her at all.

@Deathgrip 😆

people never fully recover from watching it - lol