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Original poster

No one to babysit

29 replies

Penny31 · 03/05/2021 07:38

Feeling a bit down. I see lots of pics on social media of couple friends going out together for drinks and it’s making me feel a bit sad. I’d love to do that with DH but elderly parents can’t look after my kids on an evening and we have no one else to babysit. My youngest is just 2 and doesn’t sleep very well.
Don’t know why I’m posting, just feeling a bit sorry for myself really.

OP posts:

FoolsAssassin · 03/05/2021 07:41

Sorry you are feeling low. When we could occasionally afford it we used sitters.co.uk in your situation which worked really well.

LittleBookOfKalms · 03/05/2021 07:42

I hear you op. I'm a single mum to toddler twins. Only have my parents to help. They take them every Wednesday night for me to go to college, but my social life is practically none existent. Its shit

ShirleyPhallus · 03/05/2021 07:45

Lots of babysitting apps, can you look there for someone? You could always take an afternoon off work and go for lunch while your child is in childcare / book a sitter for the afternoon if you’re a SAHM

BiddyPop · 03/05/2021 07:46

We found a local babysitter for dd so we could go out for my 40th....DD was 9. Luckily that girl and her sister were both great for the next few years for the odd occasion and dd no longer needs anyone now.

Moirarose2021 · 03/05/2021 07:47

Sp here with dc father who had no contact and all GP's dead, I advertised for a babysitter, got a nanny and a student training to be a primary school teacher. Look for solutions, there will be something.

Checkingout811 · 03/05/2021 07:48

Find a babysitter. Do a date night at home. Will the 2yo sleep for at least 2 hours so you can have a meal and some drinks downstairs or on the garden?

ChessieFL · 03/05/2021 07:51

Do your kids use a nursery or childminder? You could ask them if they would be willing to babysit for a bit of extra money. I know when my DD was at nursery some of the younger women who worked there did this.

Thisismyname77463 · 03/05/2021 07:52

It’s rubbish, we haven’t had anyone watch our child since February 2020 right as covid started.

I just want to leave the house alone, one time.

HenryHooverIII · 03/05/2021 07:55

Childminder and go drinking in the day.

I never really asked my parents to babysit the kids at night until they were a bit older and reliabily sleeping well. So eldest was about 4 and youngest was 2.

BritInAus · 03/05/2021 07:57

It's really hard when you don't have local/capable family to help. My two suggestions are taking turns with a trusted friend who also has kids, or if you can afford it, asking at nursery - quite often the staff will do babysitting for extra cash. Even 2/2.5 hours can be enough to go out locally for a meal and the bonus is they'll already know your child.

bishbashbosh99 · 03/05/2021 08:03

Everyone can find a babysitter. You can interview them so you know if you can trust them first

GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman · 03/05/2021 08:03

Any reliable local teenagers? You could try and track some down via local Guides, or ask in charity shops about any D of E volunteers they have had in.

Or do you have any local friends with sensible teenagers, or friends of friends?

VenusClapTrap · 03/05/2021 08:04

We didn’t have family to help either. So we asked around and got a lovely local teenager who had her mum round the corner ready to help out if there were any problems. When the dc started nursery we discovered that her key worker also did babysitting, so that was even better as dc knew and adored her.

Lots of people don’t have family who can help out, so like a pp said, you find solutions.

bunglebee · 03/05/2021 08:05

Hire a babysitter. Or take a day or half day of annual leave together.

Iwantacookie · 03/05/2021 08:11

Do you not know anyone with a teen who would watch them for a couple of hours?

ArtemisBean · 03/05/2021 08:12

I hear you OP, we're in the same position. DH and I just take annual leave for a day while DS is in nursery. It's not the same as an evening out but it's 'us' time we treasure. Maybe when the kids are older we'll pay for someone to babysit but right now I feel they're too small to be left with strangers.

Liverbird77 · 03/05/2021 08:18

Were the same. A toddler and a baby. Half the family live in another country and my parents can't and won't babysit.

The thing is, I guessed this would be the case before we had children. We just can't go out, so that's that. I am not prepared to have strangers babysitting, especially when my children are so young.

I suppose you have to think that this life was your choice. Personally, it helps me to think what life would be like if I hadn't had them. Yes, I'd be able to go out etc but my life would be so much poorer.

Liverbird77 · 03/05/2021 08:18

*We are

MsTSwift · 03/05/2021 08:22

We are quite plugged in to the community and always used local teens. Neighbours children and they refer you on to their friends. We live in a small city so were never more that a 5 min cab ride away if they needed to call us.

From 2 onwards ours pretty good once in bed that was it usually the sitter didn’t even see them! I did lots of babysitting myself as a teen

Original poster

Penny31 · 03/05/2021 08:46

Thank you. Good idea to check with nursery, I think I’ll do that. I know what you are saying about knowing what we signed up for, we have had great support from grandparents up until last year. My parents had them overnight occasionally which was great. My dad died unexpectedly last year and my mum can no longer cope which I completely understand. Just trying to figure out our new normal xx

OP posts:

Beefcurtains79 · 03/05/2021 08:50

Everyone I know has to pay for a babysitter.

fluffydinosaur21 · 03/05/2021 08:51

I feel you op. Last time I had a babysitter was 3 years ago and that was because I was recovering from an operation. Only time I have child free time is when my DC are at school.

Orangebug · 03/05/2021 08:53

We used to use local teens - neighbours' children mostly.

WaterBottle123 · 03/05/2021 09:10

Do you not want a paid sitter as you only trust family or because of funds?

If the former then you should probably learn to relax, there are many great professional sitters out there. If the latter, local teen is a good bet, they'll often do it for 5/6 pounds an hour plus Netflix and snacks!

I've always paid for sitters

Teeshirt · 03/05/2021 09:16

I don’t know anyone who had family to babysit. If you have local friends with DC, set up a babysitting circle. That’s what we did. Print out tokens for an hour and half-hour. Double time after midnight. Everyone gets, say, six hour tokens to start with, and then you spend and earn them like money.

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