Is there a way I can get them back?

[Amandasummers]

Split with ex years ago, all photos of our kids from birth upwards saved to his laptop, never kicked up a stink in the beginning because although we split, didn’t think he was nasty....discussed me getting a copy of them all a number of times, all agreed, still nothing. I have asked and asked and asked and he just ignores me. I don’t think he’s got rid of them or anything, he has them, I just don’t understand why he’s being such a bitch about it or even if there’s any other Avenue I can go down to retrieve them (I took most of the photos so they are “technically” me property)

I’m screwed aren’t I? Can’t imagine having no photos at all of my kids from birthday to say 4/5 years old and it’s really getting me down. Probably seems stupid to some, but it’s not to me 😔

This isn't stupid at all! Is there anyone in his family you could appeal to?

Can you send a memory stick to him in the post. Or if you see him ever give it to him then. Play it real cool though. Really calm.

Did you ever email or WhatsApp them to anyone else- say birthday pictures to a Grandparent? Would they be able to send them back to you? Wouldn’t be all of them but might be some?

Are your children old enough to ask him for them for themselves?

I’ve asked about a thousand times for him to just let me know the file size (I imagine it’s large!) so I can buy an external hard drive to give him to put them on in his own sweet time, it’s driving me mad. Kids are old enough to ask but he won’t be swayed by them. I’ve never known a man more infuriating. We’re having real problems at the moment with how our oldest is behaving/treating people....it’s all my fault apparently, yet, this is the example he sets??? it’s really really upsetting me and he has affected my life negatively for so many years since we’ve split, I’ve just had enough, why can’t he just be normal?!

What is your relationship like with his mother? Can you get her to get hold of the photos and then she can pass them on to you?

Unfortunately, none of his family like me, and have supported his hellish behaviour over recent years. So there’s nobody to help me on this 😩

Offer money? This is what I had to do to get my childhood photos from my mother. She was adamant she didn't have them until I offered £200 then they miraculously materialised.

Hi OP. This exact same thing happened to me. XH took every photo he could lay his hands on when he left, and always claimed to be about to return them when he'd finished scanning them into his computer. Friends and family rallied round with what they could find. I pretended to myself that the photos had been lost in a fire, which was a pretty accurate metaphor for our divorce. I also consoled myself that I was actually with DD every day and didn't need photos to remind me of her. (XH barely saw her.)

He finally returned them on the day she graduated from university, deliberately, to spoil the day for me. I had to be led away and plied with wine. Tw@t