What to do when the person you want to go no contact with ignores your wishes?

[Namechanger10001]

Hi,

Already have this running in chat, but am posting here too for traffic, as could really do with as much advice as possible.

Firstly, I am going to keep this fairly vague in terms of details, as it would be very outing, but could really do with some advice on the general subject.

If you've decided to go no contact with a close family member, for very good reasons, but they choose to ignore and keep contacting you or showing up at your house, what can you do? Obviously you can block from your phone and social media, but if they show up at your house, it's not a matter for the police is it?

This person is absolutely toxic, but no criminal record against the person wanting to go no contact. Just a really horrible, selfish person. Putting it mildly.

Any advice much appreciated?

Thank you

Sorry - running in *Relationships.

I think the only option here is to block said person on all social media, phone etc.

If they turn up at your house, politely but firmly ask them to leave. If they refuse, tell them that you will call the police. If they still refuse, call the police. Under no circumstances allow said person into your home.

Put very clearly in writing that you want no contact, and if they continue to harass you you will contact the police.

Get a door camera/ring doorbell.

If they persist send a solicitors letter.

If they still persist contact the police.

You can ask the police to have a stern word with them if they keep bothering you. Usually that does the trick.

If you’re receiving abuse from a close family member - brother, sister, aunt etc, you can apply for a non molestation order. Keep a detailed record of every time they contact you.

What do you mean by 'turning up' at your house? Presumably they are outside and you just ignore them.

Thank you for the replies and advice.

A Ring doorbell is a good start.

Thing is, it's not a constant stream of abusive messages and show ups, it's just enough to keep this person from truly moving forward. Having this person in their life at all is just a reminder of the past, which is very detrimental to their MH.

so block on everything.
Send a letter saying you want no contact and do not want to see them, you will not reply to their messages, and if they come to your house, you will not let them in.

Ring doorbell. Never open the door to them, even if they can see you through the window, just turn round and walk out of the room to somewhere where they can't see you. If they keep ringing, put the bell on silent.

It may take a few visits, but they will give up in the end.

Is there anyone else who can talk to them and persuade them to not come round?

@steppemum, I have suggested the letter. Yes, there are several people in the family who could intervene and would do, but this person is beyond selfish and won't listen to any reason. They just do what they want. If it causes others distress, they don't care.

Open front door.
Aim water pistol at undesirable house caller.
Squirt.
Close door.

@Chatanooga1, funnily enough I made this suggestion! Only half joking...