Perimenopause - suggestions and empathy needed 😢

[JustThatTimeOfLife]

I'm 46.

I've suspected I am in perimenopause for a couple of years - heavier, slightly more erratic periods; pain; a few other symptoms that might/might not be...

Last night, I stayed over at support bubble's house. I came on yesterday just before i left. Usually, the first 24 hours are pretty light but not this time. I absolutely flooded the bed

I washed the bed linen as soon as I realised bit it's still stained, the mattress is stained, the carpet is stained; I'm bloated; my core temperature has risen and I'm just constantly hot and can't cool down. I feel nauseus and just ill

I'm going through tampons quickly. I'm dreading going to work tomorrow because my job means I can't just nip to the loo every half hour or so to sort it, the pain on day 2 proper is always bad - like labour - and I'm just so tired.

I'm feeling sorry for myself!

Any suggestions on any of this would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Mine was like this - wouldn't come for a couple of months and then floods! Can you take the day off tomorrow as sick leave? Pretty sure you can self certify if it's less than a week.

If you don't want to say exactly what the issue is, say you've been up all night with a stomach ache and feel sick. Strictly speaking that's what you will have, so not a total lie!

Also - if you can find them, maternity pads are much more absorbent than period ones (but also bulkier - don't wear anything too tight).

Best of luck

I’m so sorry, have no suggestions but watching for advice. Just turned 40 but lighter/shorter periods for the last 2 years, generally hotter with flushes etc. Last month have been on/off very lightly like a tap with a dodgy washer. Just changed diet to low carb high fat (have done it before with no problems) and having very heavy bleed for 2 days with TMI alert occasional jelly like bloody clots. 4 pads in 6 hours so I guess it’s not flooding, but....

Also have to work tomorrow male boss who I’m not comfortable talking to. I hope you’re feeling better ASAP

I couldn’t handle it. It was awful.

Got private acupuncture. £50-60 a session where I am. Needed a good few sessions but sorted it all out. No sweats, no queasy feeling, regular light short periods now that don’t drag on for days of brown smears.

Thank god.

It's shit isn't it?

I am going in to work today because I just don't feel I can call in sick because of period issues.

I had 8 hours sleep last night (usually average about 5) and I'm still exhausted.

Tired, feeling sick and tummy ache aren't good enough reasons to have a day of work.

My work place is all women (bar 2 men) of varying ages so again I don't know how much sympathy there would be for time off for 'women's issues' when, essentially, the vast majority of women there experience women's issues.

My last period started in the evening. I started with feeling odd at 2pm and within the hour I was doubled up in labour type pains.

I can't even get to the doctors because of the way the doctors surgery now operates - call and they call you back sometime in the next 3 hours for a phone consultation. I can't have my phone on me while I'm at work.

It's just shit.

Have you looked into regulating the whole thing by going on to HRT?
Once your oestrogen levels stabilise you will get your life back AND you will be protected from all the negative aspects of menopause which are rarely spoken about like vaginal atrophy, incontinence, sleep disturbances, osteoporosis, Alzheimer’s, loss of libido etc.

No you won’t get these for a while but they are the truly life changing results of menopause which you can protect yourself from by taking oestrogen. The benefits far outweigh the risk for the vast majority of us and the beauty is you will never have to deal with menopause again.
(I’ve been on HRT for 32 years and know many women doing the same.)

No. I suppose I've only really been 'bothered by the changes for the past 2 or 3 months and didn't really think I was ready for HRT!

Might be worth looking into though. Thanks.

I second what @Esspee said. I'm 43 and peri, my symptoms weren't even as bad as yours but definitely affecting my life. I started HRT 3 months ago and I feel like I'm me again. My GP was brilliant, they don't go on blood tests anymore, just symptoms

About to leave for work....
I bought a chillow....and froze it...helped cool me down ...as a pillow or just on my body xxxx

period pants plus tampon /menstrual cup. dark clothes. don't be afraid to take time off..,flooding is not something to be dealt with at work. speak to your gp. even if you have to take a day off work to do so there are things that can help..tranexamic acid may help or mirena perhaps?

lara briden has some great advice look her up! I feel for you..I was at work once..thought I had finished stood up.,and a whole load came pouring out....not a great experience so I do feel for you

Watch out for your iron levels if you’ve been flooding. Low iron can make it worse. I had to have prescription iron.

I’d strongly recommend not going to work as you may well flood again.

I got a GP appointment and they offered Mirena, or a pill that is good in peri menopause whose name I can’t remember (which is what I took), or noristherone.

The pill helped regularise for a couple of years then I moved on to HRT. Had to try a couple but the current one femeston is ok.

I’d get an appointment and get some advice and help.

Ibruprofen reduces the flow. 2 months ago I had a sore neck and took ibruprofen for a few days which was at the same time of my period. It was the lightest period I've had in years, so I took it again the next month for 3 days and light again. Maybe not a long term solution but might help for next few days

Oh gosh definitely consider HRT. I am 40 and in early menopause and I take oestrogel, utrogestan and the mini pill for contraception and this combination means I don’t have periods, ever. Never. It’s fantastic. Some people do have breakthrough bleeding initially but worth trying. I was passing huge clots and had the heaviest periods ever before. If your GP isn’t helpful consider seeing someone either in person or remotely at the Newson Health clinic - have a google. Their website is full of free resources and information too.

Look for Lillets Ultra tampons in the orange box. I used to bulk buy mine from Amazon. They’re amazing for flooding. MUCH more absorbent than Super Plus.

If you're in to listening to podcasts I just started one yesterday hosted by an Irish podcaster and a lady called Catherine who describes herself as The Wellness Warrior. She specializes in menopause. It's a two part special talking all about peri menopause and menopause - how you can manage your symptoms until perhaps you are ready for hrt. You'll find it on Spotify and dated 9th and 16th April. So very recent. The show is called 'Ready to be Real, with Síle Seoige'. (Sheila and the surname pronounced Show-ga).

I'm just starting to get my head around all this too. My sister is a few years ahead of me on this journey following a hysterectomy. She highly recommended the advice this lady Catherine has to give.

My husband bought me massive incontinence pads once by accident , almost like a nappy . I have to say they were the best thing! But you shouldn't put up with this, and don't just soldier on with going to work , I would talk to the gp and get iron checked too. Mine was very low, I thought I was just suddenly unfit. I should've gone to the dr earlier as I ended up planning my life around my periods . Hope you feel better soon .

HRT is best started around perimenopause. What are you waiting for @RCOR? The damage has already started.

@RCOR

If you're in to listening to podcasts I just started one yesterday hosted by an Irish podcaster and a lady called Catherine who describes herself as The Wellness Warrior. She specializes in menopause. It's a two part special talking all about peri menopause and menopause - how you can manage your symptoms until perhaps you are ready for hrt. You'll find it on Spotify and dated 9th and 16th April. So very recent. The show is called 'Ready to be Real, with Síle Seoige'. (Sheila and the surname pronounced Show-ga).

I'm just starting to get my head around all this too. My sister is a few years ahead of me on this journey following a hysterectomy. She highly recommended the advice this lady Catherine has to give.

You don’t need to cope until you are ready for HRT - if you’re having symptoms of the menopause then you can start HRT now. You don’t even need blood tests to start. It’s symptom based.

I switched to low carb and cut out sugar when I was 49. It made the biggest difference. No pain and only light periods from then on.
Did you happen to eat a lot of carbs/sugar/alcohol last week?
It's amazing how sensitive premenopausal bodies are to this - when in the past we could eat and drink what we liked.

Thanks for replies to me. I wasn't expecting that.

I don't have too much by way of symptoms as yet. Mostly aches and pains. I suppose I haven't approached my GP for a couple of reasons. Firstly with the pandemic if felt I didn't have enough cause to trouble the GPs. But moreso secondly because of a history of breast cancer in my family. I need to read some more to understand if hrt is recommended in such circumstances. I know it wasn't for some time but that advice has now changed.

If you continue to flood ask your GP for Tranexamic acid which can lessen or stop flow. Naproxen is also good for pain. When I lived in Denmark they had a period relief pill that was a combo of ibuprofen and buscopan (lessens cramps) so I sometimes use both of them.

I always keep a pack of maternity pads or old fashioned nightime maxi pads at home in case of flooding. I sleep ontop of a microfibre towel in bed. Take an iron supllement if I flood. I also take magnesium (for migraine) but I realised it seems to help me with temperature regulation too. I take a piece of ginger root to nibble on and eat a small carby snack (like dry crackers) for nausea.

I had this problem and decided to have the mirena coil. My periods became much lighter very quickly and now I don't have any at all (I'm about a year in).

I am looking forward to this book being published.

I've been taking a liquid iron supplement and Omega 3 supplement, both of which appear help somewhat. I'm having a range of blood tests in a couple of weeks, including to review hormones etc, and my doctor and I are going to discuss these when we meet a bit after that but she's keen to try manage symptoms with supplements for a while if we can.

Also, I've only used them one month so far but I'm really loving period pants. I haven't had to wear them at work though so think you'd need a tampon or pad alongside to last the whole day if you're flooding but I couldn't believe how much more comfortable and secure I felt. I've bought a few new ones to try this month so I can figure out best combination, sizes, styles etc.

@DianaT1969

I switched to low carb and cut out sugar when I was 49. It made the biggest difference. No pain and only light periods from then on. Did you happen to eat a lot of carbs/sugar/alcohol last week? It's amazing how sensitive premenopausal bodies are to this - when in the past we could eat and drink what we liked.

I probably did actually. I've done my shopping for this week and had already decided to give low carb a go so I'll se what happens. Your post was encouraging!

The diet thing is fine. But if your oestrogen levels are dropping you need to replace it if you can...there are new guidelines on breast cancer and hrt.

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng23