Calling children by name in public

[Nocaloriesinchocolate]

Just musing about this. I and DH have just got back from a country park, which of course was filled with children (and it was lovely to see them having fun). We spent some time seated on a bench and dusting that time learnt the names of at least half a dozen toddlers, because Mum (or adult with them) was calling to them. It crossed my mind that it would be easy for someone unscrupulous to call a toddler by his/her name in that situation and s/he would probably come to you thinking you must know him/her because you know their name.

Furthermore, there were lots of bushes to hide in.

Yet how else is Mum/adult to attract children;s attention except by calling them by name.?

Any thoughts or am I overreacting?

Oh, and while I’m at it, one toddler appeared from behind a bush and stared at us, so I smiled and said hello. Should I have ignored him? Yes, some strangers can be vile but most aren’t and I didn’t want him to think that all strangers are unfriendly.

@Nancydrawn

Furthermore, there were lots of bushes to hide in is an amazing line.

That's DS sorted. Who needs play equipment when you can lurk in bushes

@SpiderinaWingMirror

I thought it was going to be about teens and the death that is identifying yourself as their parent by calling their name 😄

Or being seen to exist at all in the same location as them.

I keep mocking my DS that people might realise he 😱 has parents 😱. Because no one else does. Obviously. It's so embarrassing.

@BikeRunSki

We were never allowed T shirts with our names on fir this reason.

T-shirt’s, headbands, hats, bags. So, so dangerous!

If your toddlers could be called by someone and led away without you noticing, you're too far away. Whoever's in danger of this happening needs to get their head out of their phone and pay more attention...

I think the fact you're questioning whether you should've ignored a child proves you've ventured into overthinking territory.

I do think it is a topic for discussion - hopefully most people keep a close enough eye on their toddlers for them not to get too far away at any time, so using names is fine. But some don't. I think to some extent you have to risk assess - the number of children abducted by strangers is very small, and I would imagine a determined abducter would find another method of enticing a child if they didn't know their name.

I always called mine by their names when we were out and about - except when DS was going through his 'I am a dog' phase and insisted on being called 'Prince' *

• Not his name.

We could assign them a code name or alias at birth.

It's a sad old day when someone suggests children's names should not be used in public. You can clear off with that idea.

I think maybe you are over worrying a little, but its definitely something to be aware of. I've never liked names on bags or Tshirts etc for this reason. Kids can be naive and think that if you know someone's name then they're not a stranger

You are overthinking to a ridiculous level.

Of course you use children’s names. The Child Catcher isn’t real, OP.

Most children are harmed by those in their family/people they know, not strangers.

Most children are harmed by those in their family/people they know

This.

Though at the age of three my DD is still mainly referred to as Squidgy McGorgeous or one of a host of other silly nicknames, rather than her perfectly lovely actual name, so would likely be suspicious if anyone used the latter.

Hearing other children's ridiculous names is the only thing that makes country parks bearable.

You're being paranoid.

Parents who constantly model fear, suspicion and mistrust of other adults create insecure children. Setting them up for a lifetime of anxiety, failed relationships and mental health problems.

You are way beyond overreacting and into hysterical territory.

Tbh, if this was really a concern, park bushes would be full of people calling out, 'Amelia', 'Oliver' etc. The likelihood is there'd be 4 of them in the park at any one time. 😂

If you spot me crouching behind a bush, this is just to let you know I'm not lying in wait for your children.