advice please x

[adviceplease123456789]

Hi, hope everyone is well.
I please just need some advice and reassurance. I have just found I am pregnant last week (definitely not planned) I am 22 just about to go self-employed and I have only been with the dad for 4 months. Like I said this is completely unplanned but feels a bit surreal and like a miracle baby. We really do not want to go down alternative routes and are thinking of keeping the baby. but I just felt I needed someone to talk to or reassurance regarding my situation. I still live at home currently so does he (we are looking at places now), both good for the money. our main concerns are my parents. I'm an only child so expectations have always been high for me. I told my mum as I'm super close with her and she reacted exactly how I thought upset and not happy. she can't comprehend it and is gutted with me (understandable I guess) but I'm a very mature 22-year-old with a good career mindset. It's hard because like I said I will be self-employed at my mum's salon from next week but I am very busy so to me this isn't a concern but it's like my career is ending before it's even started. I haven't told my dad yet as it is very early stages and I feel I need to come to terms with this myself. but I'm worried about how he will react to. it's so annoying because timing is all over the place but it's out of my control and I just want to make everyone happy any advice would be greatly appreciated.
thank you xx

What work will you be doing in your mum’s salon? Might be tough in pregnancy. And will you get maternity pay?

What do you do for work at the moment? Is there an option to stay ‘employed’ for now so that you qualify for maternity pay and go self employed after that?

You sound very switched on to be fair.

Why is it a miracle baby?

If financially you will be stable, you will have a job and can afford the maternity leave and you want a baby then go for it. Not sure what advice you're after?

I've got some advice for you.
Stop all this worrying.
If you've made your choice, it's done.
Worry about yourself and what you need. The rest will call in to place eventually.

Congratulations

*fall not call.

Why is it a miracle?

sorry, I just wanted advice on my mum and dad more than anything and whether I should let their opinion alter my decision. I am very close with both and the thought of upsetting them upsets me.

You’re 22 years old, an adult, having a sexual relationship. So, no, your parents opinion shouldn’t override what you want to do.

This has to be your decision, not theirs. They may be disappointed that things aren’t going as they expected/ hoped for you but that’s ok. If they love you, they’ll continue to love you. Things can still work out career wise etc, you’ll just have to find new ways to make things work. If you want this baby, have this baby. If you don’t you may regret it or feel guilty. As an adult this decision is entirely yours.

I don’t get how you are ‘good for the money’. You are going self employed into a profession which has been closed for 8 out of the last 12 months - what happens if you are unable to work due to pregnancy related sickness? What happens about maternity pay? Have you concerned how you will pay for childcare?