Help me make my house tidy - please!

[Smashedpotatoes]

I'm feeling very overwhelmed by stuff. 2 young children (preschool and early primary) and it feels like I am constantly picking up stuff. I know it sounds silly but it's really getting to me. I tidy and within 5 minutes it's a complete mess again. I'm not the tidiest person naturally so it's not that I have ridiculously high standards - but our house looks like a mini tornado has passed through every day.

I'm struggling to muster up the energy to deal with it as it's hard to see the point. The kids do help tidy, but nonetheless it's a mess. When I say it's getting me down, I really mean it.

I think part of the problem is stuff, just endless stuff. To me they have a lot (overgenerous family who don't listen to my pleading to stop). A lot of it is parts with tiny pieces (playmobil I hate you!). Also, we're doing up our house bit by bit so there's nowhere out of the way to store stuff. The toys are all in shelves that the kids can get too so I can't hide things away / rotate them. So there's a kallax full of toys, and a bookcase full of other toys and board games, another one of craft stuff and another one of actual books. Then a big bag of dressing up stuff and a play kitchen. They play with everything, but not all the time if that makes sense, some things it's just once a month or so.

I want to go on a toy purge, but I want to check I'm not being an evil mum first. How many toys is normal for 2 kids this age? How much mess is normal? How do you keep your house vaguely tidy without tidying constantly or maybe this is just life for the next few years? Does anyone survive with fewer toys - is it less messy or am I kidding myself? Help, I just want to be able to walk through a room without tripping over 3 times!

Op do you have a clear out before each of their birthdays and Christmas?
I do this and it really helps.
My children are pretty much the same age as yours and they've still got lots but I'm very good at throwing things out. They still manage to mess up their room daily though.

Easiest way to keep it tidy is to buy less "stuff" Most houses have more toys than a playgroup, children don't need it. Adopt a one in one out policy with clothes, toys, and household items. Watch Stacey Solomon's new tv show, it will shock you how much crap we all have.

@WeWereOnABreak10 yes we have a clear out before both birthdays and Christmas but it never seems to help .

@LowlandLucky this is what I'm thinking. We could keep things tidier if we had less stuff. I am completely with you on buying less, sadly our family are not on the same page and are always buying things for the kids. I try and keep on top of it but the toys do seem to be gradually taking up more and more space. I'm just struggling to figure out what the 'norm' is I guess.

Honestly?

You won’t like this, but just don’t bother while they’re still little. I remember feeling exactly the same as you - just completely overwhelmed with stuff, but as quick as I got rid of it, it would accumulate again, stuff like Lego etc.

Mine are now 12 and 9, we’re trying to move house and we’ve started sorting out with a vengeance. Even now, we’re not sure about getting rid of the mountains of Lego and action figures - but we’re being ruthless! Plus now they’re older, they are much better able to say goodbye to toys and be less emotional!

@JackieTheFart, don't worry, honesty is good. Sounds like there's hope ahead at least, in 5 or 6 years time I can dream of being able to see my floor!

We can see ours now - I'm living the dream!

I am a professional home Organizer. I have been working with an older lady with two grandchildren. She has enough clothes, toys and books for her grandchildren to stock a shop. Truth is she very rarely sees them but desperately wants to be involved. I have encouraged her to invest for her grandchildren’s education and to buy them experiences instead. On the rare occasions she sees them I have suggested she takes them to a bookshop and lets them choice a book rather than presenting them with a bag full of books. Speak to your family about how they can constructively support your children. It is not healthy for children to be overwhelmed with choice. Good luck

Get yourself a couple of bin bags, set a ten minute timer on your phone and challenge yourself to chuck away as much as you can.
We had 3 young dc and quite a lot of toys but I was always quite ruthless about passing stuff on once it wasn’t being played with. There comes a point where it’s all just ‘wallpaper’ and everyone gets used to it just being there but no one is using it.
Nothing cherished ever got thrown but there’s only so much anyone can comfortably live with before it gets too much.

Look up Joshua Becker and how to minimalise woth DC.

If there is something they have outgrown or dont play with put it in a bin liner and take it to the charity shop...do not let them see you do this, the abandoned toy will instantly become their number one favourite.

I have never done this and had them notice its gone.

My friend puts stuff in the garage for a couple of weeks in case they ask for it...they never do.

Just do it a bit at a time.

Encourage "Find, use, return". "Are you finished with that? Pop it away then we can get X out" It takes time but they do get it, I was never completely strict about it but its a good habit to get into. I do it myself when I'm cooking, and it just helps.

Firstly grab a bin liner and get rid of anything that isn't used anymore, anything with bits missing or anything ripped or broken.

Have you thought about rotating them? In our playroom for my younger kids we have a toy kitchen with food, dolls crib and dolls etc, trains track, cars, ball pit and a toy box each with their personal items in. That’s still quite a lot but I also have sylvanian families, playmobil, Lego and some other toys stored away in boxes where they can’t see, and every few weeks or so I’ll put something away and bring out the new toys. It keeps them interested in their toys and it’s about 50% less mess than if I had it all out at the same time.

Also at primary school age they should be tidying up, I have 8 kids all 13 and under and all of the school age ones do chores every day aswell as tidying up after themselves.