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Original poster

What do you want for your birthday?

17 replies

celerysticks · 07/04/2021 10:31

It's my birthday next week and I've been asked this question by my Mum, my sister and my OH. I have no idea. There's nothing I particularly need or want so I'm putting it out here for some ideas!

I don't mind my Mum and Sister asking as our usual birthday treat for one another is to go for a shopping trip and a nice lunch somewhere but obviously things have been a little different last year and this one.

I do feel a bit miffed about OH asking though. His words last night were; 'Can you pick your birthday gift and let me know what you want, but nothing too expensive'... I kind of felt like just telling him not to bother!

OP posts:

brushlaptop · 07/04/2021 10:50

Makeup?

merryhouse · 07/04/2021 10:56

Whitley Neill rhubarb & ginger gin
Body Shop Kahaia scent
chocolate (unsalted) caramels
puzzle books
pretty rucksack to carry gym kit (though I don't actually need this now having got it last year)
some clothes from a catalogue I like

BarbaraofSeville · 07/04/2021 10:58

With mum and sister what about them arranging a nice garden afternoon tea with fizz and a chat, or even a meal/afternoon tea at a pub/restaurant, which will be allowed from next week?

YANBU to be miffed about your OH. If he doesn't put some thought and effort into choosing and buying a present, it's not a gift to you, it's just you doing the mental load for him again. Either let him get something generic (bottle of gin, box of good chocs) and let that set the standard for gift giving between you or tell him not to bother and reciprocate accordingly when it's his birthday.

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Events & celebrations

Bananalanacake · 07/04/2021 11:02

Lego minifigure series boxes is what I wanted and that's what DH got me, I was so happy.

1sunnyday23 · 07/04/2021 11:11

I wouldn't feel miffed about OH asking you pick something - your adults?!

I love my DH and he's very generous but often gets it completely wrong, so I send him links to what I want, except this year when he's been absolutely swamped with work and working ridiculous hours so I offered to choose some things and order them from him and the children. At least I can guarantee I will love them and the clothes will fit! But I know he cares and will make a fuss on my birthday with breakfast and dinner so I don't need him to prove anything with presents.

ArrrMeHearties · 07/04/2021 11:12

It is my birthday 2wks today and my oh has asked what id like for it, not to be an arse he has asked because in his words he wants to get me something that I will use and enjoy. Your oh sounds rather insensitive

Ninkanink · 07/04/2021 11:16

I’ve had an early birthday present of a gel nail system so I can do my own manicures/pedicures at home. I’ll also be getting two laurel bay trees for pots at the front of the house. I will hopefully be able to stretch things to a wool coat as well. Or maybe a silk scarf.

Other things I would always be happy for are make up (Bobbi Brown, By Terry or Chantecaille), a new pair of boots or shoes, a handbag, or jewellery. Books!! Especially a beautiful coffee table book or another recipe book for my collection. A set of prints for a spot in the house (we’ve recently moved from a flat to a house and there are many bare walls). Or maybe some vintage glasses as I need wine glasses and tumblers to complete my table setting.

Luckily my DH is very good with presents, but some people just aren’t, even with all the best will in the world. It’s hard to know whether he’s lazy/uninterested/unappreciative of you and just can’t be bothered, or whether he’s just trying to ensure you get something you actually want.

I’d make a wish list on Amazon with a fair few items on it and tell him he needs to pick something or a few things from it, that way the actual present(s) is/are still a surprise for you. He needs to ensure they’re nicely wrapped, too, like proper birthday presents.

LindaEllen · 07/04/2021 11:16

I usually ask for some books, perfume or PJs. I live a very simple life, and I love it 😂

Original poster

celerysticks · 07/04/2021 11:16

Thank you! That's a great idea about the outdoor afternoon tea or maybe an outdoor meal somewhere.... I'd completely forgotten places were opening back up for outdoor dining/ drinking again next week! I'll look into it.

@BarbaraofSeville That's just it! If I ever have any complaints with my OH it's that I take the mental load of most things. He rarely thinks of anything for us to do/ go/ eat etc despite me asking him to sometimes as I get fed up of being the one to come up with everything. Birthdays and Xmas in the past are the only times he's been quite good and come up with something himself but it just feels like he's passing that one on to me as well now and I really can't be bothered

Thank you for the other suggestions everyone. Gin and chocolate doesn't sound so bad

OP posts:

Ninkanink · 07/04/2021 11:20

Beautiful, luxurious pyjamas and a matching robe would also be a real treat for me.

Original poster

celerysticks · 07/04/2021 11:24

@1sunnyday23

I wouldn't feel miffed about OH asking you pick something - your adults?!

It's not so much about him asking, more the way he asked. I understand what you're saying but then on the flip side my OH isn't swamped with work, he has a decent Monday - Friday 9-5 job which requires no more of him. I, on the other hand, run a business and do all the 'life admin' so am constantly swamped. And it's unlikely he'll make a massive fuss on the day either. Maybe I am being silly, but it just feels like another thing for me to do so he doesn't have to.

OP posts:

Ninkanink · 07/04/2021 11:29

Then tell him straight out that it’s not good enough and that he can pick something and wrap it and make an effort, instead of delegating your own present to you!!

Original poster

celerysticks · 07/04/2021 12:41

Yes you're right, I will tell him.

OP posts:

Ninkanink · 07/04/2021 12:45

Good. It’s important to be honest and to make expectations clear.

cansu · 07/04/2021 12:55

I had the same issue. I also wanted some effort made but in the end I chose myself a nice piece of silver jewellery from Charlotte web jewellery. I was going to link but can't make it work.

EdgeOfFortyNine · 07/04/2021 13:35

I set up an Amazon wish list and I add to it through the year. Typically when it does get near my birthday or Christmas my mind goes blank, so found wish list facility really useful.
This morning I was browsing a thread here and read about a Revlon hair styler thing so I'll be adding that.

Original poster

celerysticks · 07/04/2021 16:15

@EdgeOfFortyNine

I set up an Amazon wish list and I add to it through the year. Typically when it does get near my birthday or Christmas my mind goes blank, so found wish list facility really useful. This morning I was browsing a thread here and read about a Revlon hair styler thing so I'll be adding that.

This is a great idea! Thank you

OP posts:

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