Any parents of young children who have had surgery, please could I have advice?

[Doggyhospitalgown]

My 3 year old had major surgery yesterday. She's doing brilliantly and eating and drinking etc and wanting to play.

Completely understandably she's very unhappy with the drip and other medical things and doesn't understand it all but we don't think she's in pain.

I just don't know how to help her in this situation as she's upset with everything I suggest, hates fussing but is also saying she's upset with everything. She's just settled with some tv but for the first time in many hours. It's stuff like she wants a toy but then is unhappy that it's leg doesn't look right, typical toddler stuff but much worse because of how overwhelmed she is

I know this must be normal but I feel like I don't know how to help her or speak to her, please does anybody have any advice?

I must add I completely understand and expected this, she must feel terrible, but it's so sad to see and I feel like I'm making things worse rather than better

I would just go at her pace like you are.

The ward probably have play specialists they should be able to work with her as needed, help her get used to things or even just play with herz

Ah I am sorry to hear about your poor dd. 3 is a tough age anyway as they are relatively independent but, can't really process decisions so tend to be upset by otherwise non events.

My DS was in hospital at 5 and more recently at 11, somewhat easier but I found the play therapist amazing, my DS was terrified of an MRI so they bought in a Lego version and a video about it on an iPad. Does your hospital have this? I think it is the norm. They can give you loads of ideas and help to distract them. Otherwise the nurses may be able to help. Would she listen to a favourite audiobook? How long is she staying in for? I guess the drip will be removed as soon as they can as they know how distressing this can be.

Hope you are both home soon it's hard on the parent staying as it is exhausting. Take care.

As Sirzy says there may be a play specialist who can help. Just let her do what she wants - if thats telly all day then so be it. They'll have her up and about as soon as they can which may help.

Def utilise the play staff and nurses, paeds nurses are so used to post op kids it could be she is in some discomfort and pain and can’t adequately verbalise it. Has she passed urine/had a bowel movement these can be uncomfortable or scary post op and they can hang on if they don’t want to go in a bed pan etc. She’s perhaps tired too, she needs to sleep more to recover but can’t.

Kids generally recover from surgery/illness much quicker than adults. It’s only been a day, you might find she’s off for a while longer whilst she gets over it all, even the different people, environments are so scary for a small child, waking up in recovery with nurses she doesn’t know it might be her processing it. I hope the ward can help out but I’m sure she’ll slowly begin to come back to her old self. Hard on you though watching her, make sure you take some time whilst she rests or sleeps or even if play come to do stuff with her, just get a hot drink or have a sleep too. Grab some air. Hard just now with visiting restricted so it’s all you 24/7 take care of yourself too op