Tell me about your long-running comedy family feuds

[LadyJaye]

My grandmother, who came from [X] village, married my grandfather who came from [Y] town.

In the early years of their marriage, before my mother was even born, my grandfather got into a disagreement with the owner of a garage in [Z] village, not far from [X] village, who thought my grandfather was a bit jumped up because he was from [Y] town.

This all happened YEARS before my sister, my cousins and I were even thought of, but to this day, when travelling to [X] village, we refuse to refuel at the garage in [Z] village. We also completely intend passing this ridiculous grudge down to the next generation, even though the original owner is presumably long since dead and we don't even really know what the disagreement was about anyway.

What ridiculous long-standing feuds exist in your family?

My mum fell out with her eldest sister over a bag of Marks and Spencer carrots over 30 years ago and has refused all attempts to make up.

Um none. But now your other thread makes sense.

My dad has 11 siblings and has fallen out with all of them at one point or another. The various siblings form alliances that shift like the sand, so one year it will be dad and Aunties XYZ plus Uncles AB against all of the rest and the following year Aunty X and Uncle B will have switched sides and will have been replaced by other Aunties and Uncles. The longest running feud is between dad and his eldest brother, dates back to sometime in the early 1990s and concerns a Radio Rentals TV. That's all the info I have.

At family gatherings, which are thankfully few and far between, I never know which sibling is in my dad's good books or on his shit list.

I was asked to leave a cafe in Anglesey as my dog was barking. Fair enough except it was not my dog barking but a dog sitting at a different table altogether. My entire family left the cafe in solidarity. Every family get together it is mentioned and there are mutterings against the cafe.

My auntie fell out with my mum, her sister, because my mum bought me the same dress my auntie bought her daughter, without knowing auntie had bought her daughter the same dress. I was 3. I'm 33 now. They didn't speak for 5 years.

These are excellent. I have nothing to contribute but want to place mark. Hope more stories surface!

My banana wouldn't eat Chinese takeaways because she was "doing her bit for the war" (grandad was in a Japanese war camp and was never the same when he was release ww2), I tried to reason with her so many times....

*nana not banana, my bananas hold no grudges, although they bruise easily

My Dad and his brother still argue over who broke the other's toy tank in 1949

This is going to be a good thread 😂

My mum is still cross with my aunt over a pink party cardigan that they had as kids in the 1950s. Officially it belonged to both of them but in practice my aunt requisitioned it.

DH and BIL fell out as kids when BIL pushed DH over in the road and he split his head open. BIL still refuses to accept it was his fault. It was in 1962!

My nan and great aunt didn't speak for years after my nan came home from work one afternoon to find my great aunt in bed with a random man. Both women were in their 60s at the time. My nan kicked her out (GA had been staying there since her divorce).

My nana fell out with one sister because she got married in white when she was in her forties and had many "gentlemen callers" prior to her wedding - and reportedly a couple of terminations. Also, another sister couldn't have kids, so it wasn't fair on her that her sister had terminations.

Nana also didn't speak to her brother for 25 years because he scheduled their fathers' funeral on an inconvenient day.

My Mum never forgave my Dad's Auntie for buying them a tie (yes a man's tie) for their wedding present.

We have a proper family feud. Great-great uncle married his young nurse when he was in his 70s and she was in her 20s and left the family farm to her instead of my great-grandmother, who was in line to inherit it. No-one in my family ever had anything to do with her and her children ever again. All the people involved are long dead, but still there is no contact.

In petty feuds, my mother has never forgiven my P2 teacher for not picking me for the Christmas play. I am now in my late 40s. She occasionally meets her around the shops and still talks of her in tones of intense dislike. My mother knows how to hold a grudge.

Years ago after the war my mums sister got a new pair of red shoes
My mum had odd feet and They just didn't fit her so she couldn't have those red shoes, she never forgave my aunt for that

My mother has been I care home with dementia for a good 4/5 years now and is quite incoherent.....

She still talks about those red shoes in nearly every sentence 😂 now that's a grudge

Not a family feud as such but some dirty laundry discovered doing a family history document. One of my ancestors had 26 children (I had to tier his family tree in three rows as his offspring wouldn't fit onto the width of my page otherwise).

When his wife died, he married his step daughter six months later and merrily carried on procreating. He clearly bored of trying to find names for all 26 so called two of his daughters Alice (neither died early so not a tribute). How can he not have taken 10 minutes to think up a different girl's name....?!

I was sent to the shop for a loaf of bread (over 33 years ago now) and was sold a mouldy, out of date loaf. My Dad marched me back to the shop and flung the bread at the shopkeeper called him a wanker and how dare he take advantage of children

Since that day, my dad never set foot in that shop. It's been a computer repair shop, funeral parlour, nail bar and sandwich shop but he was mad at all of them "because the mini market owner was a cunt". My dad was a scary man so when he explained his bat shit reasoning to other people they would just nod in agreement and promise never to go in there.

"gentlemen callers"

I love this phrase, makes it sound all the more "respectable" 🤣

Opposite way round in my family... My brother still feels guilty for something that happened nearly 30 years ago... An accident that left me with life long scarring on my face, and needed treatment for many years.
I've never considered it his fault. It was a fluke. (I fell and smashed my face on a table, which he had moved there while tidying his toys. We were 6&8 at the time.)

"gentlemen callers" - agreed much nicer than FWB!

My grandfather apparently disowned his two sisters because they went to a pub on their own without a man to chaperone them. This was in the 1970s.

I'm sure there are many things, but my parents liked different radio stations. Dad liked classic gold and mum liked classic fm. But the thing was one of them would walk into the kitchen and switch it over to their preferred channel. Then the other would. Neither of them realised they were doing it until I started laughing and pointed it out. There was a channel switch everytime one of them walked into the kitchen and they were oblivious

I've mentioned my father refusing to speak to my mother because she said he didn't look like a young Paul McCartney (he was 67) on here before.

@vampirethriller

I've mentioned my father refusing to speak to my mother because she said he didn't look like a young Paul McCartney (he was 67) on here before.

Ha, that reminds me of the time my grandad stopped talking to my grsan because she jokingly said she wouldn't share her hypothetical lottery win with him.