What gift do you buy?

[popspops]

For a 90 year old grandma who can't walk far, has poor eyesight for reading, won't eat anything unhealthy and who lives in a tiny flat with no room for anything? They already have two plants I bought them on the only available surfaces.
I can't think of anything

Photobox do personalised jigsaws of varying complexity - I got my 90 year old Gran one of those for Christmas and she loves it.

Other gifts that have gone down well:
A framed paper cut picture with the names of all her grandchildren
A chocolate set crafted to look like a cheeseboard (she’s a fan of both!)
A really glam cherry red wool poncho thing so she can look stylish when she goes out
Beautiful Harris tweed blanket and matching cushion

Do you have a budget in mind OP? £5? £50?

Of course, you have an air of pomposity about you so perhaps a new set of doilies? For yourself.

I used to buy my early 90s Nan pretty strings of beads from places like Accessorize (she couldn't do up necklaces so liked to wear long beads instead).

Also pretty chiffon or silk scarves.
My Nan liked to look nice even when she didn't go out.

And a small photo book with photos she could show off to her neighbours eg my cat who she loved to look at.

Check out turtle doves for nice recycled cashmere gifts 😊

This may sound a little odd, but we recently redecorated DH's gran's toilet for her. It was a bit tired, so we spruced it up, took her out to buy new pot plants, towels etc. She was chuffed.

I think it was the time we spent with her that made her happy as much as anything physical. It was a weekend well spent for us.

@Tehmina23

Oh the idea of a book of photos of your cat has simultaneously made me really happy and sad.

We lost our very much loved cat too early in January and my Mother in Law absolutely adored him. A picture book will be just the thing for her birthday. Thanks so much for the idea.

@ismiseeire

Of course, you have an air of pomposity about you so perhaps a new set of doilies? For yourself.

I think you're confusing me with the person you asked you why you suggested a gift to commentate the queen, that wasn't me,

My grandma is 94, similar set up. No room for anything and no internet/mobile signal either.

I get outside planters as she has a small patio with french doors that she sits next to. But mostly she likes donations to her favourite charities (Donkey Sanctuary and Lifeboats). So I do that with token smellies (she likes talc).

@Gazelda's room refurb sounds perfect for someone who doesn't need any more stuff, love that.

This sounds whacky and she might be too frail for it but you said she liked to travel when younger, an Occulus quest VR headset would be a thrill for her I should think. Not buy her one, that would be a bit mad but if you could borrow one for an afternoon she could visit almost anywhere in the world all via a headset.

Loling at 'nice cashmere scarf' as suggestion one, that's on my mumsnet bingo sheet. I realise my suggestion will be equally scoffed at though 😁.

I bought my grandma 2 China mugs for her 90th. She loved them

Mine would really appreciate an audiobook subscription (note to self 😁)

It would have to wait until things open up more, but if she has any old friends still around, could you arrange and facilitate lunch out. Not just booking, but collecting and taking the friend(s) to the meet up, then leaving them to it (but staying close enough to get back quickly if needed) and coming back to take everyone home. I thinking once elderly people are dependent on family to take them out, there social circles must get very limited. I bet a lot of lifelong friendships end up been cut short, because neither party is able to get to the other.

(Not saying she doesn't enjoy socialising with you and other family, but imagine it was the other way round and your only social contact had been your gran for months or years, how much would you love a night out with your best mate)

For her 80th we found photos though my grandma's life (many from slides) and put them in an album. She went through it many times and showed it to any visitors.

i was a bit at the suggestions for wethers / a walking aid as s 90th birthday present! my granny was still interested in (and capable of doing her own) hair & makeup at 90 so i got her a natural coloured chanel lipstick and she loved having something so “fancy”

My mum recently started looking into a bed jacket. I'd never heard of them but they're kind of like a quilted cardigan for if you're cold sitting up reading in bed. Kind of pretty (I think!) That or I'd second a nice soap and hand cream set like Sanctuary

A fruit hamper.

It would have to wait until things open up more, but if she has any old friends still around, could you arrange and facilitate lunch out. Not just booking, but collecting and taking the friend(s) to the meet up, then leaving them to it (but staying close enough to get back quickly if needed) and coming back to take everyone home. I thinking once elderly people are dependent on family to take them out, there social circles must get very limited. I bet a lot of lifelong friendships end up been cut short, because neither party is able to get to the other.

This sounds lovely and is what I would hope my dd would think to do for me when I'm old and young! Knowing her, she'd get the era wrong and I'd have a Bros tribute band.

@ForeverBubblegum

It would have to wait until things open up more, but if she has any old friends still around, could you arrange and facilitate lunch out. Not just booking, but collecting and taking the friend(s) to the meet up, then leaving them to it (but staying close enough to get back quickly if needed) and coming back to take everyone home. I thinking once elderly people are dependent on family to take them out, there social circles must get very limited. I bet a lot of lifelong friendships end up been cut short, because neither party is able to get to the other.

(Not saying she doesn't enjoy socialising with you and other family, but imagine it was the other way round and your only social contact had been your gran for months or years, how much would you love a night out with your best mate)

I love this idea, I'll plan that for the summer. Thank you.

Is it a one off gift that you want to give her OP or are you in a position to provide her with more sustained support face to face?

I think that a handwritten letter weekly might mean a lot to her if you're far away. Your presence would be ideal. If you can't be there, some sort of regular contct. I'd love the suggestion of chauffering her and her mates to the Bridge club or whereever they go for a day/night on the tiles - give them a bottle of wine and off they go.

You know your Nan better than we do. Try to think of what she might like.

I buy my elderly grandmother soap, flowers, framed photos or calendars.

@ismiseeire

Is it a one off gift that you want to give her OP or are you in a position to provide her with more sustained support face to face?

I think that a handwritten letter weekly might mean a lot to her if you're far away. Your presence would be ideal. If you can't be there, some sort of regular contct. I'd love the suggestion of chauffering her and her mates to the Bridge club or whereever they go for a day/night on the tiles - give them a bottle of wine and off they go.

You know your Nan better than we do. Try to think of what she might like.

It's a one off gift this time. I can't go and visit her as she's allowed one visitor only so my mum goes, I do the shopping and she takes it to her. She doesn't go out much as she's the only one of her friends left if she does it's with mum.

@Workyticket

An Alexa so she can listen to audio books?

I was going to suggest either this or a portal which has Alexa built in. She can use it to video call family and friends and also ask it to play music and read books.

bimbimbap

i was a bit hmm at the suggestions for wethers / a walking aid as s 90th birthday present! my granny was still interested in (and capable of doing her own) hair & makeup at 90 so i got her a natural coloured chanel lipstick and she loved having something so “fancy”“

Couple of years ago, housebound MIL received the usual. Scented drawer liners, slippers, sensible house cost, “safe” candles. I remembered there always being a hairbrush and a lippie on the shelf under the hall mirror and on a mad whim bought her a shocking scarlet lipstick in a gold tube. She bloody loved it. Wore it to the memory clinic every week,

We forget that elderly relatives are us, just older.

For my elderly mum, gifts would be
Bird feeders/ bird bath
Plants for garden
Nice pjs
Books, especially poetry
Gin
Chocolate
Tickets for a show
Cocktails/ afternoon tea
A pedicure

Previous birthdays have been a tattoo, a balloon trip and a ride on a Harley with a load of Hells Angels! ( That was for her 84th)