Why do people hate a winner?

[orientalknife]

I recently led a challenge in which there was a clear winner through effort and dedication. Of course acknowledge all efforts and the hurdles people face but in my opinion there is also nothing wrong with recognising hard work, commitment and talent.

The snide comments about the winner were very revealing. Comments about how skinny she is,how she is an over achiever etc

I do not judge about people's choices in terms of dedication, commitment etc. I get that there are life hurdles. However don't bitch about the woman who did well because she worked harder or had more reason to drive than you. Get a grip!

Pure jealousy. They want to have won, and hate that they didn't.

People can't be arsed to celebrate when the same people win over and over again, even if they deserve it. It is much more fun to root for the underdog.

That's it

Pure Jealousy. I don't understand that toxic attitude. Well I do - it stems from childhood or sexism or lots of other reasons

A woman does something much better than me then yeah I might think wow I'd like to do that but hell good on her for making it happen. I'll either accept it's not something that motivates me personally or it will inspire me to try harder

Yep jealousy.

But maybe you were not perceived as objective as you wanted to be?
If you were solely in charge of choosing the winner, your judgement will be questioned.

Skinny...?

Tall poppy syndrome.

What is the context — were these people colleagues? Friends, family? How do you know they were making these unpleasant remarks — were they saying them to you or to the winner?

Tall poppy syndrome is very much a thing in British culture. It's wearisome.

I think this can be a sexist thing. People (both women and men) don't like a successful, ambitious woman and seek to diminish her. I think it's possible these comments wouldn't have happened if the winner had been a man.

* I think it's possible these comments wouldn't have happened if the winner had been a man.*

I don’t agree with that statement at all

drpet49 there's been a lot of research into Hillary Clinton's 2016 election campaign and the words used to describe her in social media. For example, it is really depressing to see how often she was described as "bitch". Obviously people had bad things to say about Trump too, but none of the most common words used about him were as insulting or demeaning as "bitch".

This is a UK thing, I find. People are so jealous of others and can’t just be nice about their success.

A winner- at what? Can you provide more detail. A winning stamp collector and a winning triathlete are two different beings in my book!

For me it depends on the attitude of the winner. A winner smug and full of their own importance would make me dislike them. Someone who struggles and and is modest when they win I feel good for.

I keep most achievements private, I'm quite modest, possibly due to socialisation. While growing up, there was a sense of never "showing off", so achievements were never celebrated, at least mine were not. Although, I learned as an adult that my parents were proud of me.
I generally find, that even though I'm modest, and generally quiet, when people find out they still hate me. And I never show off, nor am I smug

Because some people suck . A lot of those people also think they're the best thing since sliced bread and want the acknowledgment of that without the effort.

Yep, sexism and toxic interpretations of how women are meant to behave. We shouldn’t want to win things and try our hardest - it’s just not ladylike. Competition wins should be in an ‘acceptable’ field for a woman such as crafting or cooking. And any win should be met with a self-deprecating blush or giggle.

Possible I’m projecting a little as a competitive and sporty woman who had received barely concealed scorn in the past for trying hard (sadly more from other women than men).

Jealousy, envy and internalised mysogyny. The ancient idea in society is that women should be seen and not heard in some cases, but most importantly they should never be aknowledged.