Struggling to cope with job but need the £, please help

[GoldRhino]

Hi all

I started a job in October and it immediately became clear that it was a nightmare. Ridiculous pressure on us, terribly short staffed, literally jogging around to get everything done, not enough time to get everything done, bitching and upset between employees, it’s just terrible and it’s really really affecting me.

On top of that I’ve just been diagnosed PTSD and with everything together I am struggling to cope. Yesterday I totally crashed and had to go and lay in bed mid afternoon and alternated between crying and being stuck staring straight ahead, overwhelmed. My hands are shaking and I feel shaky in myself.

I don’t think I can cope with the job any further but until or IF I find another job I don’t know what to do.

I’m also meant to be going in to work in a couple of hours and don’t feel able to.

What kind of work are you doing?

It sounds like you’re in a really bad place mentally. Is it worth contacting your GP. It’s not usually something I’d suggest, but maybe it would be worth getting signed off for a week or two if you feel the way you do.

You could then use the time off to start looking for other jobs.

Have you spoken to your managers about how this is impacting on you? You can self certify for a week to give yourself some head space then ask for a back to work meeting to explain?

I am sorry you feel like this.

I work in a school.

I’ve called in sick today as I had a bad stomach this morning likely brought on by the stress.

I am considering going on mental health sick leave after the Easter hols. I’m even more anxious because I had an interview a few days ago for a job I really want but I’ve not heard anything.

I was in the headmasters office in tears a few days ago but nothing had changed.

Definitely ask to be signed off for a few weeks, it does sound like your mental health is suffering.

I would try to put all your efforts into applying for other jobs. It sounds like this one won’t get any better.

I would ask your Doctor to sign you off with anxiety/stress. Use that time to apply for some other jobs and get help for your mental health.

Look after yourself OP and I hope you feel better once you've had some time off

Are you all year round or term time only? Will you get a break for Easter?

Schools are a nightmare, especially if SLT are not supportive or ignore issues (especially with support staff) If you are feeling so unwell, please get to a GP and get signed off. If you don’t find another role then you should get an OH referral and hopefully some support put into place.

OH meaning occupational health? What might they do to help?

I’m term time

OH means occupational health. They will talk to you and make recommendations back to the school, such as adaptions to work or a stress risk assessment. This puts more pressure on the school to make changes and support you.

If you are TTO, then take the break and then decide what you want to do. Check your absence policy, it might require a sick note from day one if it is either side of a holiday.

Only you can really decide if adaptions are enough to make you want to stay - I decided not to stay in my school role and left after 8 months.

Just heard back from the job I applied for and I didn’t get it. I’ve been volunteering and working there on a temporary basis for 18 months and they didn’t think enough of me to give me a bloody admin job.

I feel so low I could scream. Been crying for half an hour.

Have a good cry ans get it out of your system. Job hunting is soul destroying at times, especially when you really need the role.

I am sure it is not that they don’t think enough of you, but I understand why you would feel this way.
Ask for feedback if you feel strong enough.

Take one day at a time at the moment - what are you plans for the next couple of weeks? Can you get outside and meet up with people?

Make a GP appointment for next week or the following week and talk then through how you are feeling x

At the moment I just feel like the biggest loser in the world and can’t stop crying

You are not a loser. A job should not make you feel like this, this is a problem with the job and the school and not you.

Keep repeating that - it is them and not you.

But I volunteered and worked as a temp for them for 18 months and they didn’t employ me! So it must be me

Gold Rhino no school will give you a job because you volunteer and help out for 18 months it doesn't work like that. All jobs in schools are hugely sort after they have many applications for each and every role and they pick and choose as they like....you will not be alone in your disappointment there will be many other applicants also feeling this way. You have heavily invested and worked hard but you need to let this go stick a few more applications in elsewhere...don't take it so personally it rarely is personal...good luck...

I agree with Bear, it won’t be personal.

Try not to second guess the selection process, you don’t know who else they saw. Maybe they had an internal applicant, maybe there was someone who had volunteered for longer or someone who had worked there before.

I have spent over 20 years in HR/recruitment and there are many factors they would have to consider. If they did not like you, they would not have interviewed you.

Sorry you feel this way OP.

If it helps, you won’t have been turned down for, the other job because they didn’t like you.

I interviewed 5 people for a similar sounding job recently. There was one candidate we both thought was fab, she’d have been the perfect fit personality wise, she had the experience, the drive. I’ll call,her Pam. Pam was ace.

Unfortunately someone else interviewed better (we have to do a points based system, they scored higher) and we had to take them. We offered them the job, they faffed us about then declined it. We want straight back to Pam. Alas she’d just accepted another offer.

I think 3 times this week my co interviewer has sighed at a problem and said ‘Pam would have sorted this out, you know‘

So, just remember, you might be their Pam.

@Bearnecessity it wasn’t at the school that I didn’t get the job, it was elsewhere. I already work at a school and hate it.

Sorry Gold whether the voluntary work was done elsewhere or not what I said up thread still stands...good luck with your job hunt, rejection is really difficult but happens to cracking people all the time...