If your DD has ADHD

[SlipperFeet]

How did you know and what happened once you discussed this with your GP? Did your DC have to see a psychiatrist?

DD is 6 -
Has never slept through the night
Very quick to have emotional outbursts, which are very hard to control
Struggles to concentrate and gets angry/frustrated when asked to focus (this was a particular struggle during home schooling)
Very forgetful
Very busy
Is very bright with reading (top of her class) but struggles with self esteem and thinks her school work isn't good enough. Has been in tears about this recently.
Very chatty
Struggles to follow instructions
Interrupts constantly and doesn't listen when others are speaking
Prefers playing with boys

Some of these things I think are just being a 6 year old though? I am concerned if I raise my thoughts with a GP, my DD will get a complex that there is something wrong with her and she will be anxious. On the other hand, if she does have ADHD then I would prefer to know so we can support her as best as possible. I did ask her teacher a few months ago and he said there was no concerns, but I do feel because she is bright that she could blend in at school more than a child who is struggling academically.

To be totally honest as well, reading about the condition and how it presents in women/girls has made me examine my own behaviour and wonder if I could have it too. It has taken me a long time to write this post because I struggle to focus so much! Although I am also worried that if I mention this to my GP they will think I'm being ridiculous, or a hypochondriac.

If anyone has been in this situation, any advice or help gratefully received.

I have ADHD and both my daughter's do. It takes years to get a diagnosis (in my area anyway). You can get a referral from the school nurse, to speed things up ask for a phone call with the school SENCO and ask them to do observations and a Conners scale.

I wouldn't want to label her op. Can you look at her diet and exercise? I know mine is noticeably worse after chocolate and a day without a walk and play outside.

In the nicest way possible, you would never say this to someone with diabetes, would you? ADHD can be (and often is) debilitating, especially when children leave the structure of childhood and mature into adults. There is medication to help, but you can't receive medication without a diagnosis. I know you mean well but reiterating these tired old stereotypes really doesn't help anyone.

Thanks for your replies everyone, I've got lots to think about. It is quite daunting speaking to a professional about it but I think I will have to bite the bullet. I would rather know either way so that she can get the support if needed.

Getting the (highly unexpected) diagnosis for my DS really helped our family.

We too expected him to grow out of behaviours but he didn't so we just kept getting angry with him. Now we are much more understanding. He first slept through the night aged 7 but is now a really good sleeper aged 9, although he still has the occasional nightmare.

He started medication a few weeks ago (his assessment showed executive-function weaknesses which can only be improved with medication). The difference is fantastic and he loves it.

School had no idea he has ADHD - he has a high IQ (tested) and was just considered as an average student because he masked it so well.

@Justheretopostaboutadhdingirls

Hi Op. As per my username, I've rejoined Mumsnet (too addictive for me normally, usually just try to keep it to lurking) just to post on your thread.

Your description of your daughter was me as a child. Almost to the letter.

I was very bright and did very well in school so the rest of my behaviour was just chalked down to personality. I was finally diagnosed with ADHD at 33 after a lifetime of wondering why I was so 'smart' but also so 'lazy', easily distracted, impulsive (led to some dangerous behaviour tbh), little ability to focus on lengthy tasks, and a myriad of other issues which meant while I could perform at work and at school, I was depressed, burnt out, and miserable really.

If you're wondering about your DD please don't be afraid to have it investigated so if she does have ADHD she can get the support she needs. I wish so so so much that someone had noticed mine earlier, but when I was a child the only children diagnosed with ADHD were mostly hyperactive boys (like my brother).

I have masters degree and am fairly senior at work - my ADHD hasn't held me back, but I so wish I known, so I had coping strategies instead of just thinking I was a terrible person.

Yes, you could be describing me! Diagnosed at 38. Burnt out after a lifetime of masking but I still managed a successful legal career and degree etc. Do seek diagnosis for her (and you). If I had known sooner, I might not have reached burnout and had more support in life. It was so so good to finally understand myself (and my ‘zany mother’ who def has it too!). Bon chance!

Sparrowfeeder
What were you masking?

@DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou I disagree that you can say that age of 6 is too young for a diagnosis my child is 6 and is having trouble everyday for years he can't cope in school or home and is currently being seen by the paediatrician he has trouble since nursery and I'm still fighting for him and ill not stop until I get the support he deserves and needs

You've described my 5 year old DD almost exactly apart from the poor sleep. That's the one thing she doesn't struggle with. Although winding down to go to bed can be a different story.

I've been trying to get support since her 2 year check. I've been repeatedly fobbed off with "it's normal childhood behaviour" and "she'll grow out of it". She isn't growing out of it. She's getting worse.

The school have told me not to pursue a private diagnosis because "they'll diagnose whatever you pay them to" and that schools and LAs don't usually recognise a private diagnosis.

It's a struggle if I'm honest. I don't want to label her. I'm not looking for an excuse for her behaviour or what might be considered the result of poor parenting. I just want her to be correctly supported.