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Azaylia Cain

835 replies

LetsGoChamp · 28/03/2021 21:23

I can’t stop thinking about this poor little girl. My heart hurts for her family. I know she’s not the only child fighting a life threatening illness but she’s all I’ve thought about today.

Sorry if this post upsets anybody that is familiar with this little girl.

OP posts:
gratefulmum1 · 23/04/2021 20:53

@Hannsmum also I forgot to say try to reframe what you see if you can. I know you said you saw her as ‘helpless’ in her buggy but I honestly saw her as ‘cosy’ and ‘content’ 🧡

Honeydrops5 · 23/04/2021 21:10

My gosh I have a little girl my self and this literally breaks me. I cant even begin to comprehend the pain they must be going through and to their poor baby. I just want to hold her tight and make it all better. It's horrible how helpless everyone is in this but my god she is a fighter. I hope, and I've never prayed but i pray she finds a way through this. J really do. I'm holding back the tears writing this because my partner is beside me and I dont think the will quite get it. Everytime I see her little face my heart breaks. I wish, I hope, that a miracle happens for that family. 🧡

TheWelshposter · 23/04/2021 21:20

Following this thread as have found it extremely upsetting too. Just hoping that she is so comfortable and cosy and not feeling any pain.
I have found that I have no interest these days in the usual instagrammers that I follow....watching people moan about everyday first world problems just seems pointless compared to this.
I can't even imagine the panic of being told to enjoy your last weekend with your baby, it would flash past in an instant. It's so so unfair. Her parents are very strong and I hope they can take comfort one day in the awareness that Azaylia has raised.
I have definitely been appreciating the mundane routines with my healthy children and feeling so grateful.

Hannsmum · 23/04/2021 22:47

[quote gratefulmum1]@Hannsmum I’m so sorry it’s got to you so badly, I know how it feels and it’s horrible. Everything you are saying is right, she should have all those wonderful experiences. Just know she doesn’t know about these things. I used to teach antenatal classes and the parents used to always ask me what they needed to buy there baby, where to take their baby etc. The only thing babies need aside from essentials (food, good hygiene and sleep) is love. Being held close, having their senses simulated, smelling their parents, seeing their loved ones and hearing them. Knowing they are close and doting on her every need is worth a million Disney trips to a baby. They have a steady stream of loving family members and friends around them and will have professional and medical support 24/7. You sound like a brilliant mother if you are so invested in a baby you haven’t met. Use that energy to create the most special memories with your babies and where you can in your life, honour Azaylia and what her journey taught you. Sending hugs[/quote]
Thank you Sad

blindspots · 24/04/2021 01:09

This is me being very honest as the mother of another AML child who died earlier this year so it’s just me expressing my feelings that are still very raw; but probably one of the things that I dislike hearing is that childhood cancers are so survivable these days.

They are for most children but unfortunately not for most paediatric AML sufferers (and a couple of other types obviously, DIPG being one), and as well as my son I know two others with AML from the same ward who have died after my son did this year.

I know it’s a very personal thing to go through but to me, as the mother of a childhood cancer patient who didn’t survive through no fault of his own, just slightly older than Azaylia, it feels to me like it minimises the children who don’t survive.

Please know I’m only sharing my experience as a cancer mum, and believe me I think it’s great most children do survive, it’s just something that I know I, and the other bereaved parents find difficult to hear when it gets said,

I know this thread is about Azaylia, and lots of you are feeling very affected by this beautiful girl and her parents hell on earth ordeal so I’m sorry as I really don’t want to make anyone feel worse; I’m just trying to share my experience as the parent of a child who suffered the horror of AML too.

One of the reasons I tell his story here and elsewhere is to make people realise that this is more common than you think, cancer is not all smiling bald kids who get better and get to go home,

If Azaylias story has made you hug your kids a little tighter and appreciate every day with them more then that truly is great - I never thought cancer would happen to my child, even when we got the results I never thought he wouldn’t make it. All I know now is that nothing is guaranteed

blindspots · 24/04/2021 01:53

Sorry for going off topic and making it about me.

Let’s hope Azaylia gets to feel the sunshine on her face a little bit more this weekend

ProbablyGryffindor · 24/04/2021 06:38

@blindspots Much love to you. Please don’t apologise for sharing your experience. It’s exactly what Azaylia’s parents are doing, to raise awareness, which is so important. I’m so sorry that your child and your family have been through similar to this, my words cannot describe what I want to say. Lots of love and best wishes.

gratefulmum1 · 24/04/2021 07:02

@blindspots

Sorry for going off topic and making it about me.

Let’s hope Azaylia gets to feel the sunshine on her face a little bit more this weekend

Please don’t say sorry for sharing your experience - we are grateful to hear it. I have mentioned on here before but m best friend died of AML when we were little and sadly I don’t know any children personally that have survived this cruel illness. You are in my thoughts and I hope you and your family have a lovely weekend, knowing that by talking about your son has helped many of us understand more and made us appreciate life more ❤️
NicoleKidmanSuperFan · 24/04/2021 09:01

@blindspots thank you so much for sharing your story with us. You didn't have to give us the privilege but you did. I'm happy you raised the point that most AML children don't survive as it will make us more sensitive to talking to anyone should we need to.

I'm so sorry you went through this ordeal but I hope you find comfort in knowing there are a lot of people like us on mumsnet and around the world that love you and your child and through your child and many others who are going through the same thing, we are learning the real essence of life. Your baby and Azaliya and all other children suffering are a big reminder to drop the daily moaning and enjoy the day. They have showed us the day to day wins in life that we lost sight of. We also want to help with childhood cancers more. Your little hero has done so much in his life just like Azaliya has and their life has had more of an impact that a lot of adults that have had a full life but had no influence.
Lots of love and support and respect to you

NicoleKidmanSuperFan · 24/04/2021 09:02

More impact than a lot of older adults I meant *

JLR12 · 24/04/2021 09:49

I thought I had managed to come to terms with the fact that Azaylia wasn't going to miraculously come through this and prove the doctors wrong but after hearing the updates yesterday and they have been told to make the most of the weekend it has shattered my heart all over again. She has fought through so much and you want her to keep on getting through each day but the poor baby must be exhausted. Thank you to you all for being here to listen to all of us talk and get our pain out when like others have said maybe people close to us at home just don't quite understand.

Dnadoon · 24/04/2021 11:16

Gosh my heart aches, Thankyou OP for starting this thread I have lurked from the beginning.
blindspots you are very brave and I am very sorry for your loss Flowers
I definitely take comfort and joy in the mundane with my children, Even when they are fighting and squabbling on the way home from swimming lessons just now.
I feel grateful to have them.
It is all so sad Sad

Hannsmum · 24/04/2021 12:00

[quote Kate3150]@Hannsmum- I have been feeling the same, I haven’t slept properly in over a week. I feel silly admitting that because she isn’t my baby and her parents are being so strong.
But I’ve never heard a story like this one, I cannot get my head around the horrendous journey this little baby has been on in her eight months. Call me naive but i just didn’t think it would ever get to this stage where they wouldn’t be able to treat her anymore.
In my head it’s like how can they not do something for this sweet, innocent, beautiful baby?
Also to feel so much empathy and love for people I don’t know.
I’m a different person because of this, I’m not taking anything for granted and appreciating all I have.
You are an incredibly special girl Azalyia.
LETS GO CHAMP 🧡[/quote]
Yes i do feel silly as well when i don't even know her. But it's just So hard seeing this. I don't know how her parents are coming really.

One of my closest friends daughter had leukemia as well when she was 5 and thankfully she got better. She's 10 now .and although I felt hurt as well seeing her through chemo treatments and made me incredibly sad., I was thinking this would be the same for Azalyia but seeing this journey has just given me another perspective totally, probably because this is not looking positive.

I'm a little better this morning but I'm just still hoping for a miracle. I wish she grows up to see the impact she has had around the world 🧡🧡

wingsnthat · 24/04/2021 16:50

They have such a strong wider family, don’t they? It is bittersweet that there’s another baby girl in the family born days apart

OhWhyNot · 24/04/2021 17:54

Heavy heart today. I keep thinking of her gorgeous little face I hope she isn’t in pain poor little darling

How the life of strangers can touch so many is so touching we all wish for a miracle that can only be how her parents keep going

Kate3150 · 24/04/2021 18:28

Thinking of them all 🧡

Terrysmyorange · 24/04/2021 18:38

I have been thinking so much about them today 🧡

Thank you Blindspots for sharing your story and I am so very sorry for your loss Thanks

It's really made me appreciate my children so much, even when they are bickering. As many others have said, nothing is guaranteed and to appreciate all the small things.

LagneyandCasey · 24/04/2021 18:38

My heart goes out to anyone who has been through similar with their children. It puts everything into perspective. Life is short, seize every moment.

What an extraordinary family Azaylia has. I've only just started following on Instagram. I hope the outpouring of love and support for them is helping a little. Wishing her the very best pain free, loved filled life for the time she has left. She will certainly leave an amazing legacy
🧡🧡🧡

Thefaceofboe · 24/04/2021 19:06

Crying proper fat tears after reading the last few pages of this thread. Her parents would be so proud to see how many lives their baby girl has touched Sad

OhWhyNot · 24/04/2021 19:59

blindspots I’m so sorry to read about your little boy. Life is so utterly unfair and cruel at times. I feel so sad that so many children and their families go through this Thank you for bringing a personal perspective
X

BoneAppleTeeth · 24/04/2021 20:12

I'm just in awe at how incredible Azaylia's parents are, and their wider family wrapping them all in love, it's just so heartwarming to see, she sure is a special little girl, and she has a very special family surrounding her. I hope in time they can look back on this time with so much love.

Lostmyself86 · 24/04/2021 20:30

@blindspots I'm so sorry to read about your little boy. I wish there was some way theee was a cure for AML. I hope for it. I can't begin to imagine your pain. X

I hope if Azaylia is still here she is comfortable. I wish for a miracle but I also cannot bare to see a child suffering if that miracle won't come. Bless them all

Emmelina · 24/04/2021 21:12

Such a beautiful family :(

mrssunshinexxx · 24/04/2021 22:29

Feel worried that there has been no update at all it is quite unusual for them. I hope she is as comfortable as possible x

Hannsmum · 24/04/2021 23:44

@mrssunshinexxx

Feel worried that there has been no update at all it is quite unusual for them. I hope she is as comfortable as possible x
Me too. I'm just hoping its because of what the nurses said and they are just having their private time