Children going to secondary school

[Mumpoppins]

Hello,

I hope everybody is well.

I would like to know about parents opinion on an idea that I have.

My twins are social butterflies and are due to go to secondary school in September this year. Many parents have questioned how the twins are very socially confident and made me think of setting up a 'Social club' for children below the age of 11 years old.

I have a Childcare degree and have been a manager before. Would parents and children benefit from a children 'Social Club' in their town?
The goal is to support children's socially/ confidence using their interest so they are confident to start their secondary school and make friends.

Please let me know all your thoughts. Thank you!

It sounds a bit vague. What would you do with them?

How will it be funded? Who will run it? Where? Have you looked at existing Youth Service provision in the area?

Hi there,

So I would include various activities such as chess, coding (building robots), puzzles and many more. (Much like a playgroup up but just focusing of social interaction and confidence.) There would be group activities such as scavenger hunts, outdoor obstacle courses, where some groups of 3 would be formed in order to reach the goal. I do understand there are many groups formed already such as football group, so this is only to focus on children that may benefit from a social confidence boost.

I only think this would set off as it would focus on social confidence and in unfortunately in schools, many children are left up to themselves to make social interactions.

And speaking from experience, family interactions show great benefits, however children often take cues from their parents so if the parent is not very socially confident when talking to peers, it may project onto the children.

Hi @EatsFartsAndLeaves,

So it will funded by the families that would like to take part or by the local school if they wish to use this service to support the children in their care.

The company would be run by existing childcare providers. I have gained a great network in order to set up a business with like minded individuals so creating a team with correct procedures in place should be a breeze.

I am from North part of London and unfortunately there hasnt been many companies like this in the area. Youth clubs are for teens right?

How would you make it inclusive for children who's parents can't afford it? They are, possibly, the children who need it most.

Hi @WhatWouldPhyllisCraneDo,

Great question. So depending on the amount of parents within the area that would sign up, I would go through the process of applying for Government funding. Or pitch this to local schools and that way, the school itself can fund the company/ project. This will mean it makes it accessible for many many children in their care.

How would a social club that explores children's interests be any different to the other clubs that children attend that align to their interests such as:

• brownies/scouters/guides
• gymnastics/trampolining/acrobatics
• football/tennis/swimming
• youthclub

It just doesn't seem like this is a gap in the market.

I don’t get it either! Would it be aimed at year 6 for transition or year 7 so they can make new friends? Either way feels like a limited market. Would it be a club for those who need to be more socially confident or for everyone. What would be different then to the usual class interactions. I assume I am missing something?

I have a year 7 and it isn’t something they would want to do. They already go to clubs associated with their hobbies as raised by a PP.

Hi @HalfShrunkMoreToGo,

This would only support children who may have a low social confidence. Children who may have low social confidence are likely to avoid groups such as football or scouts, or if they attend, they will avoid being a confident part of the group?

This is a great question and has me rethinking.

Im not sure, I just want to help children with social anxiety and low confidence to be the best they can be when they go to secondary school. I know many children like this from my years of experience in childcare and many go unnoticed in a sense, in the classrooms.

Hi @SandlakeRd,

Yes, its just for those who are transitioning into Year 7. In secondary school, they do have a lot of clubs but many of the children that joined, still lacked social interaction skills in order to make friends. And this all affects them in later life when building a future for themselves.

I think you would have to be careful how it is marketed then. You don’t want the club to end up with a stigma attached.

Or pitch this to local schools and that way, the school itself can fund the company/ project.

How do you see this working then? Schools can’t afford to fund a project like this surely?

My son had very low confidence at that age. He didnt attend groups for that reason so not sure why he'd be likely to attend one like yours over anything else. Sorry. I know you mean well but I'm not sure how it would actually work in practice. I imagine you'll end up with a load of confident kids anyway who will take over and the quiet ones still won't want to attend. That's my experience anyway.

I would use it for my shy dd if she had the opportunity to meet others going to the same secondary at a club. She is the only one from her primary going to her secondary school.

Most school budgets are already stretched beyond the limits.

When my DD went up to secondary she did 'social skills' once a week in place of a lesson. I'm not overly certain what they did in the group but there were cooperative activities, turn taking etc.
The best thing was she got to meet other 'quirky' kids she might not otherwise have come across in lessons (the year group was split into thirds).

I think this is the kind of things best set up under the umbrella/sponsorship of a secondary, only for kids going to that school who have identified need (e.g. struggle with social skills / confidence or whatever).

If it is self selecting you will just get the confident kids who like the idea of the activities you've selected rather than your target audience.

Yep, that's precisely what we need. Children from all the local schoools mixing, just before going up to the seniors 🙇🏻‍♀️

Not to mention, if they don't want to go to 'interest' clubs where they'll at least have something in common with the other kids, why on Earth do you think they'd want to go to a club purely for the part they hate 'socialising'???

My daughter’s secondary offer summer school to the year 7s starting in September in non Covid times. Pretty much everyone I know signed them up to it. Idea was to get used to the school, meet the cohort and settle in a bit before the big kids go back. For a relatively small fee, it helped out working patents as the kids were not eligible for, and too cool for, primary school holiday club. I think there is a market for this, but it’s not going to give you an income all year round, unless you can convince the school and parents to pay for after school social club for all of year 7.

Year 7 this year have missed out on friendship building and the best bits of year 7, because of covid.

But normally this would all be taken care of OP, so I'm afraid I can't see the need.

Most decent secondaries round here have 2 visit days for year 6's. And 2 days where the year 6's meet at the school in the summer holidays. Plus they get allocated a buddy, a fellow year 7 peer. And a year 8 buddy to help them for the first term.

I think it would be fantastic if there was a club on offer from, say, May to September every year, for Y6 children going to a certain comp.

I think it would be unlikely to be funded by schools - but would work if you could get the Secondary school on board.

They could advertise it and even email every parent of a Y6 who's going to go there to let them know and pass on the clubs details to register.

I wouldn't worry at all about intending it/marketing it as for 'low confidence' kids. If it was advertised as 'Weekly club for those starting Y7 at X school in 2021. Lots of activities, come and get to know your year group' - you'll have the social butterflies. But I know as a parent of a 'low confidence' Y6 leaver as he was the only one going to his secondary from his Primary school, I would have JUMPED at the chance for him to get involved in a club specifically full of kids in his new year group.

I also think the problem with trying to do it before they finish year 6 is that it might interfere with year 6 plans. Schools with have SATS, may have residential and other activities / days out, and they will also probably be gearing up for a year 6 party, leavers assembly. So scheduling may be tricky as you are looking to bring together children from different schools.

Just a thought but have you considered how you would include students with sn, who may struggle with the more basic aspects of socialisation. Or dc who are introverted and may form social connections in a different way to social butterflies?

My SEN 11yo goes to a club that is based around developing social skills and building friendships. We pay for it ourselves.

If I’m honest, you having gregarious twins and a childcare degree would not be enough to persuade me to hand over my child, or my cash. Sorry. And I know my primary wouldn’t have the budget for it.

We are all so diverse. We can't all be 'social butterflies'. We will all have a different starting point and a different comfort zone.
Achievement for one child may be simply smiling at another child.
I think it sets children up for feeling like they are a failure if they aren't naturally outgoing.
We can't all be trained to fit in with this idea.
I think of Stepford Wives child-style.