Petty things that have put you off a book

[RosieLemonade]

I have just finished a book based in 2017. Teenagers called Tim, Paul and Sarah. It really took me out of it.
Anyone been put off a book for a petty reason?

Another one: people moving countries at the drop of a hat with either no mention of what visa they are using, or something that is clearly not possible IRL.

I read a crap thriller recently (recommend here - thanks MN ) and amongst its annoying things were characters who "swallowed hard".

I moved on to a far superior thriller, but still there is lots of hard swallowing going on whenever anyone has to steel themselves up for something, or face an uncomfortable realisation, etc. Do people really do this? Gives me a sore throat just thinking about it!

See also "hairs on the back of my neck standing up" . I always think the person must be a werewolf.

Just gave up on a doorstop of a Science Fiction book (Marrow by American writer Robert Reed) when, in the second of so chapter, our teenage heroine seduces an alien just annoy her parents The sex leaves her haemorrhaging blood from internal injuries that would have killed her if she hadn't been superenhanced with repairing nano tech, and she goes 'ah well...' and carries on as if nothing had happened.... Even as a crass insensitive male I knew this was time to hurl the book.

Over promising by the blurb. I've just lashed a book that should have ticked every box for me (feminist, gothic horror, perfect for fans of Donna Tartt, Rebecca and The Handmaid's Tale etc etc), but it was so woefully dull that the comparison has just made me cross.

Another thing that puts me off is pointless detailed description (I'm looking at you JRR Tolkien with your three pages of what colour belts the dwarves all wore and how they styled their beards). If it is relevant to the character, tell me. If not, then it's just a waste of words.
Do I need to know that Janie is "slim and willowy with unruly dark hair and three moles on the left side of her face." or that Joe is "a tall thick-set man with wiry red hair and steel-framed glasses"? Why not just use those things in what they do - as in "Janie pushed her hair out of her face as she bent down to pick up the bins"?
It's like the author has to give you a full and detailed profile on the character as soon as they are introduced into the text and that's it.

You can tell if the better known author has been asked to do a review for a newer author with the same publishing house. I just read an endorsement from Marian Keyes that a book that was in the rick o'shea fb group, (can't remember its title, but two lonely people, one dog) and it was, quote, ''gorgeous''. That's it. To me that means this was a load of mawkish shite but I"ve been asked to review it. But I'll never know as I won't read that. Another book reviewed by Marian keyes, The Republic of Shame and she said ''Utterly brilliant, please read this''.

Scotland and England are different. I read a really great book (unfortunately can't remember what it was called) where the two main characters had met in the arse-end of Northern Scotland at school, lots of totally believable flashbacks tracing that relationship, until the end where she failed her A-levels. Only a few private schools do A levels in Scotland. It ruined the whole book.

See also people with quite ordinary jobs having huge houses in Edinburgh. There's a really nice book called Mix Tape where a freelance music writer and a college tutor have a huge three bed house with a converted attic in Stockbridge. Hahahahahahaha.

Books set in England by American authors that get basic stuff wrong. Like calling pavements 'sidewalks' or making Bath a seaside town. Who in England knows what a 'kitty corner' is, or spells 'Eton' as 'Eaton'? The list is endless, unfortunately. Grr!

I read a book & the author praised his editor & proof readers to high heavens. Pity they didn't spot he'd referred to Talisker Skye scotch as 'whiskey' throughout.

Oh, yes, books like Outlander where the author's been on a visit to somewhere and writes books about it that bear no resemblance to reality.

@garlictwist

My mum just finished The Thursday Murder Club and complained that it featured a Lidl delivery van when "everyone knows Lidl don't deliver".

Yes, because that's the only chink in armour of plausability...

I complained about that too 🤣

Was it delivering TOO Lidl?

'TO' not 'TOO' argh!

Ha, I took the Lidl deliveries as a bit of wish fulfilment. I'll be honest, I forgave Osman everything for making the Parking Permit people the most powerful people in the book. Visions of him carefully diagramming MN parking threads.,,

Yes to the name thing - a group of 30 year olds all with names that are currently trendy but would have been vanishingly rare when they would have been born. Something set in the 15th Century in which a porcelain chamber pot was used (I threw that one across the room - the book not the offending pot). One set in the 12th century with a protagonist who kept putting his hands in his pockets. Something set in Britain in late 1945 with not a hint of the war, it's over right?Arrggghhhhhh.

I'm currently reading an Elizabeth George book actually and as well as everything else it's full of typos. Cost me £5.99

@99point9FahrenheitDegrees

Ha, I took the Lidl deliveries as a bit of wish fulfilment. I'll be honest, I forgave Osman everything for making the Parking Permit people the most powerful people in the book. Visions of him carefully diagramming MN parking threads.,,

Yes I thought of that too 😂😂😂

My theory is with things like that ‘it’s an alternate universe’
I’ve more issue with typos/spellings/wrong words.

@AnaofBroceliande

Oh, yes, books like Outlander where the author's been on a visit to somewhere and writes books about it that bear no resemblance to reality.

I wonder if she's ever been to Scotland. Or has the romanticised version that some North American's like

Let's be honest, she had a steamy dream about a man in a kilt one night, and is writing a story around it.

My theory is with things like that ‘it’s an alternate universe’

Like the way I add a couple of centuries to any dates in classic SF books set in the 'distant future' of the 1970s... 1980s... 1990s....

Exactly Sandman. I demand to know why we don't have flying cars, all our meals in one pill and gad about in fetching silver space suits! I feel robbed.

F.A.B., Iklboo, the 21st Century has been a crashing disappointment to me too.

A Lisa Jewell book - usually a brilliant author - recently wrote a full page on the description of a character putting avocado on toast. Right down to she got the knife out a drawer, spread it back and forth etc. A full page!! I half expected an avocado related twist to come later to bolster the relevance but it didn't. Such a random thing.

Also the book (which was shit), set in London has paparazzi photographing a man simply taken in for questioning on a missing girl case and plastering his face and back story all over the front page when an arrest hadn't even been made. Would happen post-Levinson enquiry. And the one that really angered me - someone in the UK's BIL was set at £1million. WHAT. This ain't America. Lisa should've known better

I’ve just read a book with a Topher in wondering if it’s the same as up thread!
Ruth Ware one

I stopped reading a book by Jean Paul Satre (pretentious? moi???) on page one - where there was a loving description of the skidmarks on our protagonist's underpants.

Next!