Joy suckers

[Werk]

I have married one.

We have just moved into a lovely new house - recently refurbished and so nothing much to be done except curtains/blinds and buying a couple of bits of furniture. We are very fortunate.

DH - complete joy sucker. Gloomy. It isn't as nice as he remembers x,y and z are wrong etc. He has completely pissed on my chips and I want to shake him.

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THE HOUSE.

He is never happier than when he has something to complain about he is getting worse with age.

Anyone else have the same?

This thread makes me glad to be single. Grumpy old men.

@picklemewalnuts

Push back. Make a joke of it.

DH is like this, and now when he opens his mouth I say 'well, obviously it's all wrong and nothing's going to last, but apart from that what do you like about it?'

'I thought we could get a take away- obviously you won't want to as we didn't discuss it in triplicate last month and mark it in the calendar, but that aside, do you want chinese or Indian?'

It's habit. It needs pointing out and rejecting. I called him a 'knocker'- someone who can always find fault with something.
'Don't be a knocker, you're knocking again, knock knock'.

He's much better now. If you generally like him, it's worth putting the work in.

This is great advice! My H is a worrier, and a perfectionist about specific things (mostly the house) and it's SO FUCKING ANNOYING. We moved into a new build and the site manager got pissed off with him snagging every tiny little bit of paint and plasterwork. It was embarrassing. He knows he overdoes it (because I tell him...) but I think I need to take it to the next level

Mine is the opposite. He is a male Pollyanna due to his utterly miserable parents. He’s great though 😁 always looks on the bright side and appreciative of everything. Whatever the girls and I cook for example he thinks is amazing even if it’s gone hideously wrong as he says he’s grateful someone has cooked for him!

MIL and FIL. They are like this.

All. The. Fucking. Time.

@1and2

MIL and FIL. They are like this.

All. The. Fucking. Time.

Same here. I don't think they even know they do it anymore. DP seems determined he won't end up like that (but he definitely shows signs sometimes )

@4amWitchingHour my DH is a perfectionist too - nothing lives up to his expectations.

We have stayed in some of the best hotels in the world but he always finds fault; it is actually easier going somewhere cheap and cheerful with him.

He has now gone to collect the curry from the "old" local takeaway after deigning that the new one wouldn't be good enough 🙄

It's tough. My DH can be a bit of a doom sayer. I brought this up with him recently and he genuinely didnt realise he did it so often.

Eg I will comment on a nice house by the river, and he will say 'it wont be so nice when sea levels rise'

Or I will mention our savings and he will say 'well with inflation it wont be worth much soon' etc etc.

Exhausting.

@Indiaplain

It's tough. My DH can be a bit of a doom sayer. I brought this up with him recently and he genuinely didnt realise he did it so often.

Eg I will comment on a nice house by the river, and he will say 'it wont be so nice when sea levels rise'

Or I will mention our savings and he will say 'well with inflation it wont be worth much soon' etc etc.

Exhausting.

Mine does this. I comment on something and his reply begins with "yes, but...". I've started saying it along with him to try to get him out of the habit

Oh god I'm married to one too.

I share your pain.