What makes the perfect self-catering holiday?

[NeedATan]

We are looking to start a self-catering holiday business, starting with one dog-friendly two-bedroom cottage in a rural part of the West Country (UK). We have a pretty comprehensive list of what we need to buy and provide (it will be quite high end, mostly aimed at couples, friends or families with older children) but we'd love to hear from you what you like to find when you go and stay in a self-catering property. Anything and everything considered! Thank you.

I like to be within walking distance of a decent pub, that's the first thing we look for.

Other things we like:
King size bed with good linen and plenty of pillows
Good wifi
Powerful shower
Proper bath sheets not just a "bath towel" that barely covers my bum
Well equipped kitchen
Log burner
Welcome pack with some nice biscuits
A smart tv so we can log into Netflix

Comfy beds and lovely linen
Good quality towels
An instruction book/guide or leaflets to the local area and short walks
Parking
WiFi
Enough plates/glasses/cutlery for breakfast and dinner without running a dishwasher in between
Enough comfy seats for the number of people able to stay
We often go away with my parents (pre covid) and now a little one too so we tend to pick places with 2 bathrooms and a hot tub for the evenings

Good WiFi
King size bed in main bedroom
Wine glasses and champagne flutes
Soap in bathrooms ( I really hate when there’s no soap and you can’t even wash hands without going to the shop)
Smart tv, if going luxury then poss with Netflix provided
Enough sofa space for everyone
Maps of the local area
Local restaurant recommendations
A few basics in the kitchen - oil, salt, pepper and some washing up stuff and laundry liquid

Off road parking and wifi are essential. Normally I would book pet free as my husband is allergic. Ideally 3 bedrooms but if only two then I would want twin beds in the second room as bunks are too small for teens and they won't bed share. I would expect linen and towels to be included. Ideally self check so a lock box.

Not deal breakers but ideally provide basic condiments and things like tin foil. Big mugs. Enough seating for all (amazing how many places don't provide this), lots of storage space for clothes, including drawers and lots of coat hangers and a clothes airer Also somewhere to store coats and shoes, even just hooks and a simple shoe rack. Room in the kitchen cupboards for food, this is so overlooked. I would also like to be able to control the temperature, lots of places tell you not to adjust it.

Curtains or blinds big enough to cover all the window. Bath and Shower. A second loo is a big bonus.

Oven gloves and a tea towel

Enough sockets to charge all phones, ideally bedside for me

We stayed in an incredible self cater cottage in sizewell Suffolk at Xmas. Just fabulous. Huge comfy bed cotton bed linen. Thick pile carpet. Minimal decor. Huge powerful shower. Wooden floors. New kitchen. Wooden counters. Clean windows. Basically gorgeous decor. Big airer. Car park next to house. Private path to beach. Outside light. Simple patio set for warm evenings. It set a standard. If you can do all this... You'll have loads of repeat bookings.
Oh no smokers and no pets.

everything above and i know this one is going to sound funny but a cheese grater in the kitchen we stayed in a holiday cottage last year and the kitchen had every gadget you can name went to make a cheese roll and no grater and i like grated cheese on my sarnies

Easier to tell you the things that put me off:

• Tiny mugs and glasses
• Just enough crockery/cutlery/glasses for 4 people
• Blunt knives
• Cupboards crammed with lots of stuff
• Leftover salt, pepper, oil, teabags from previous guests
• 2x dishwashers tablets for a week stay
• Additional throws in beds or those silky runners across the bottom
• Huge lists of rules
• Any expectation that I'll do more cleaning than just wipe surfaces and empty bins
• A tiny freezer section in the fridge
• A 'sitting out area' with a couple of broken chairs and a wobbly table
• Small towels
• Drawers full of out of date leaflets and flyers
• Tatty board games with bits missing
• Ornaments on every surface
• Heating that can't be altered

Other than that I'm pretty easy going.

I want a comfortable bed and decent pillows - not rock hard or flat as pancakes.

A good powerful shower and preferably not a shower over a bath. Personally I don't want or need a bath.

Proper bath towels that I can wrap round me not silly skimpy ones.

A well equipped kitchen. We often like to cook for ourselves in the evenings. Not bothered about a dishwasher and would never use a washing machine on holiday

Wifi, couple of games, maybe pack of cards, kitchen with home away from home cooking, dish washer and washing machine.

We had the most amazing holiday last year and only (and I mean only) complaint was there was enough pegs for washing and a few more broke while there. Amazing visit otherwise.

Some where that feels a bit luxurious with a lovely view and a woodburner

I won't rent anywhere with a leather sofa.

Agree on most of these! Leaving one or two dishwasher pods is really tight.

We staying in an amazing place in the west of Ireland that had everything you'd want.

Basically I want somewhere as nice if not nicer than my own home.

Wifi is a major one for me. Do you have good restaurants nearby? If not I would want a well equipped kitchen. Sharp knives. Proper roasting/baking tins. Solid frying pans and saucepans. Comfortable bed/furniture. I would like leather type sofas etc that can be wiped down between guests particularly if other guests have dogs. Off road parking and an out door seating area.

I do not want mismatching glasses/mugs etc that have cleared out of the owners home. I do not particularly want cushions or decorative throws etc unless they are washed between guests. A decent shower is a must. I would like a dishwasher and ideally a washing machine. If there is not a dryer I would like a clothes horse and or a clothes line.

On arrival I would like a welcome pack with tea/coffee milk sugar maybe some fresh bread scones etc. Also a copy of the instructions of the washing machine etc. I stayed in one lovely villa thats cooker was so complicated that we had to ring the owner and ask them how it worked and they had to ask the store where they bought it. I do not want left over condiments/oil/herbs from other guests. Please provide towels.

I would also like some kind of internal lock that I can put on for security in case someone got one cut unknown to the owners and come back to rob the place. Also given that you are marketing towards families with older kids/couples make sure that you have plenty of free sockets to charge phones/tablets/laptops etc. Normally everyone wants to charge their things at once.

Why the spare bedding, may I ask?

As for wine in the welcome basket, you need a very expensive licence to provide alcohol so we decided to skip that as it wouldn't make financial sense.

The shower is an over-the-bath one as no room for separate ones unfortunately.

Warm and cosy and the heating left on for arrival
Nice modern decor
WiFi
A decent shower
Lots of fluffy towels and heated towel rail in the bathroom
Cotton bedding in plain colours
Directions to the nearest pub (preferably in walking distance), restaurant and shop.

A really big bed with a comfortable (not hard) mattress and luxurious bedding. A log fire or wood burner. Comfortable sofas and a nice tv and DVD player. Good wifi. Some outside space and suitable seating. Some means of making real coffee (preferably not using pods or capsules). A great shower and lots of hot water. A well-equipped kitchen that isn't the dumping ground for all the owner's old cups, pans, knives and can openers.

And everything to be very very clean.

Clean!
Good selection of utensils and pans
Fluffy towels, nicely folded
Good firm mattress
Decent TV with Netflix
Early check in would be a bonus. It's annoying not being able to get into a property until 4/5pm

Hot country
Swimming pool
No need for a car
Beautiful countryside nearby but in a medium sized town or village with excellent restaurants and hopefully a beach.

A comfortable bed and comfortable seating. Plus WiFi.

I agree about the early check in especially if you have to be out by 10, it means you lose both Saturdays out of a weeks holiday.
If you do specify a late check in it would be nice if you say you'll contact people earlier if it's ready.

I'm also not keen on having the owners meet and greet us then show us around, I'm happy to get the key from a key safe and not have to make polite conversation after a long drive.

Cleanliness is a must and it's really handy to have basic condiments such as salt, pepper, vinegar, sauces and a well stocked cleaning cupboard.
Definitely a decent vacuum cleaner too, we take our dogs with us and I hate it when the vac is rubbish or even worse not supplied, I like to vac a couple of times a week and make sure there is no hair left anywhere.

I echo what many others have said about fast WIFI.

• A king sized bed which we can both get in from either side. I don't want to crawl across the bed to get in, or have to crawl from the foot end!
• A bedside light and socket on each side of the bed
• If no air con, then several clean, strong fans. Not a tiny desk one for a large space! For the short period of hot days in the Uk, there is nothing worse than a stifling bedroom
• A TV in the bedroom which is large enough to see from the bed! Not a tiny thing set high up the on wall
• Dust pan/brush/Broom incase of spills/breaks
• Large wine glasses- asda do decent ones which are a good size & last. I don't mean those enormous balloon styles, but certainly larger than those tiny glasses
• At least 2 bath sheets each. I hate only having 1, tiny towel. I have long hair and prefer a 2nd towel to dry it on
• Maybe towels for their dogs too?
• Fly spray
• Citronella candle for outside seating area

A generous attitude:

so big bed
big towels, and enough for spare
big mugs not those shit corporate teacups
min 2 sets of cutlery and crockery pp
salt, pepper, oil, sugar, milk and nice coffee with cafetiere (not nespresso though)
extra blankets
enough dishcloths and teatowels
washing machine and drying facilities
provide washing up liquid and washing tabs
a spare chair (dining and easy)
garden furniture

get in from 3 and check out after 11 - its not a holiday if you arrive in darkness and have to get out at dawn. I would happily pay a little extra for the offer

decent, current local tips for places to go and to eat and drink

Do not under any circumstances leave the previous holiday makers leftover pasta, herbal tea and ketchup accumulating etc.

Why the spare bedding, may I ask?

One of my kids were sick in the middle of the night when we were staying in a holiday cottage, there was no spare bedding and her bed needed to be stripped. She ended up sleeping on top of a bath towel on top of a bare mattress with a throw from the living room over her.