Advice on reducing screen time?

[Greenpickless]

I have a 7yo dd. She is an only child and very anxious, and really struggled over lockdown with loneliness etc.

Both me and DH have been working full time at home and trying to juggle school work etc before schools re-opened. We got in to a bit of a bad routine of dd spending so much time on her iPad, watching YouTube, playing Roblox and on Skype with her friends (which I didn't mind so much as it really helped her get some sort of socialisation).

We are at the point now where she's back at school and getting back to her old happy self, but we need to really reduce her screen time as she's got in to a habit of wanting to play on her iPad 24/7 when she's not at school. I realised earlier that she got lots of toys for Christmas and has barely even looked at them since the new year. She used to love drawing and colouring etc but isn't interested when I suggest we do different things, and I know I need to be stricter about it. I've been letting it slide as she's had such a hard time when not being able to be at school. I don't want her to look back on her childhood and think she was just plonked in front of a screen all the time (I know she won't as it's only been during COVID time but it's been quite a big chunk of her life!)

I'm going to sit down and talk to her about it, as she's bright enough to understand why we need to make changes.

I am wanting to know if anyone else has done this successfully? How do you manage screen time? I'm not sure what is a 'normal' amount to allow each day. I was thinking some time in the morning while I get things ready for school, and then an hour after school and then we will put it away and I'll get some toys out/colouring/reading etc.

It's become such a norm that she can just go on her iPad any time that I'm unsure what's the right way to manage it. If anyone can share what you do with your children, I'd be really appreciative

No advice op but just wanted to say I’m in exactly the same boat
I think if you have an only you have to ‘entertain’ IYSWIM so it’s easier at the minute to leave them to it although that makes me feel terribly guilty
At the minute I don’t think I can face all the tears & tantrums that are going to come with the rationing of the screen time

Same boat here. :)

I am planning on gradual weaning off. So we will start with devices or 30 minutes after dinner. Then 15. Then off. (And I usually pull the wifi as it goes for me too).

Weekends..... it is hard as there is nowhere open right now, so i am trying to just reduce a bit there too.

I feel guilty how much screen time there has been, but we have been WFH and the DCs at home and in the end we had to do whatever kept things on an even keel.

Thanks both, I'm glad others understand!

I agree with weekends too. We do get out to the park/on walks etc, as we are lucky to live near lots of countryside, but there's not much else to do. I'm going to start setting up some toys in the living room to play with (she got some Sylvanians and other stuff for Christmas) as maybe if they are out she might gravitate towards them instead of wanting her iPad all the time.

watching with interest (similar here with 8yo DD).

It's hard because I'm a LP and rely on the screentime for work, etc.

And DD wanders around aimlessly trying to find ways to get on the screen when I stop her. It's crazymaking!!

I was trying to think of board games with the Dcs at the weekends..... and also dvds. It's another sort of screentime though. Now the weather is getting better though I think this will help. We are a 30 minute drive from a beach and I wanted to go rockpooling (turned down with no small amount of disgust by every other member of my family)

I wonder if the iPad is "broken" and needs sending for repair could be a good way around it, at least in the short time while the habit is broken.

@fabulousspider

I wonder if the iPad is "broken" and needs sending for repair could be a good way around it, at least in the short time while the habit is broken.

I’m not normally one for lying, but this is what popped in my head too. Maybe it’s been sent off for a week or two then when it’s back you put some boundaries around how it’s used. Might help break the habit initially.

I’m assuming she’s back at school?

My kids are using screens more than they would if not for lockdown. They’ve been quite good at realising it’ll be healthier to have less.

I set the rules with my children, and then setup the Screen Time settings accordingly, so only certain apps are accessible, at certain times, and for certain lengths of time. That way there’s no nagging/hassling on their part, and no ‘gifting’ them extra time so I can drink a hot cup of tea in peace, on mine. Has worked really well.

Yes she's back at school. I agree that nicer weather will help. I don't really remember it being such an issue during the first lockdown, but the weather was good and we spent a lot of time outdoors, so hopefully it will make a difference. We have had hail here the past couple of days so I'm hoping for nicer weather soon!!

She's not the type who will tantrum about not being able to have something, which is lucky, so I'm hoping it will go ok when I talk to her about it!

Dh installed an app that only allows them a limited time. They also switch off a vertain ampunt of time before bedtime.

“It was nice being able to talk to friends online and play games when we couldn’t see our friends but now you’re back at school we need to go back to how things were in the autumn/last year. Do you remember how we used to just use the iPad whilst cooking tea/before school/after reading? And how we used to go to the park with our friends? And went to the beach? Well that’s what we’ll be doing again. What else can we do now that we couldn’t do before?”

I have the same issue and have started using a screen time management app which has really helped. The one I am using is called Quostido (something like that, anyway!) You can control how much time they have per day and restrict certain times too. It has more features if you pay for it. It's definitely helped and DD seems to think more carefully about her screen time as she knows it's limited.

Model no screen time. So put your device away too.

Sit down and play with her, building Lego, playing with dolls or whatever. Really get into it with her and slowly decrease the time you spend playing with her so she care learn how to play again.

I wouldn’t really “reason” with a 7 year old, it’s not a negotiation. So simply say- oh mega screen time for when schools were shut, now we can get back to normal.

Ours have an hour a day and then the tablet locks. They can use it when they want, but once it’s gone it’s gone. They have kindle fire kids tablets so it’s easy to set this up. It’s set to 2hrs on the weekends incase they fancy a film in bed or something in the morning. They are very used to this, and now often get bored and wander off to play with toys anyway. (7 and 10).

Great, thanks everyone for the advice and suggestions. It's really helpful to see how others handle this too