Is Mother’s Day about you as a Mother or your Mother

[merrygoround88]

I’ve always made it about my DM - bring her out for lunch and afterwards for some drinks. What do you do, spend it with your children or your mother

My DM died when my DC were v young and for a long time Mothers Day felt quite hard. It was hit and miss whether DH remembered to organise anything for me when DC were little, although I always prompted him to get MIL a card. Now my DC are a bit older (and get stuff themselves - or ask him for the money) so I usually get a card, flowers or chocolates. We never go out for a meal or do anything particular. One year DD got me a novelty sign about being a mum. It was a bit useless and not really my thing but I appreciated it because she chose it. DH wouldnt stop going on about what a rip off it was and how it was £12 (which to be fair was riduculous) but I wasnt sure what I was meant to do with that info, he had presumably not given them a budget, and agreed to buy it. He still mentions it about 5 years later!!😂😂

This year will be tough as DH has recently lost his DM

Both DH and I lost our mothers, me many years ago. It's my first as a mother this year and I'm looking forward to a card and flowers arranged by DH until the baby is old enough to make a pasta necklace and scribble on a card

I'm completely non contact with my mum. I get cards from my son and my husband, and a small present.
Mother's Day, my birthday and our wedding anniversary usually all fall within a month of each other, so we don't spend a lot on it

I am very sorry to hear about those who are NC with their mums or their mums have died - a hard day in that instance
Hope everyone has an enjoyable day regardless of their circumstances

It's about us both, although I do have to occasionally hint to my mum that I'm also a mum too! In recent years we haven't often seen Mum on the actual day, often the day before.

DH lost his mum many years ago, and whilst I don't want to take it away from my mum, I am conscious that it's a hard day for him, so we tend to go quite low key

Both- I’m a single mum, and my DM makes an effort to make sure DS has a gift to give me (although he’s actually recently become very good at hiding the things he makes at nursery under his bed etc and whipping them out at the appropriate moment on my birthday/Christmas/valentines).

I get DM flowers or make up, and tend to make a nice lunch for me, DM and DS and we spend the day together. It’s just an excuse for a family day really.

Usually both. Usually have a big family meal. For the second year running we won’t even be able to visit. We usually go to the Mothering Sunday church service.

Both. My mum always comes to us for lunch and to be fussed over, and I usually get a gift and breakfast in bed.

Used to be both but my mum died 3 years ago - I don’t expect much of a fuss but we’ll see. Dh will see his mum for a doorstep visit id imagine

My mum and MIL always lived too far away for it to be about them, so I've been spoiled really, in getting Mother's Day to myself.

It's about me as a mother. I get DM a card and gift, and drop it off. But my first one after having DD DM was very clear she did not expect me to spend the day with her like I used to. She always spent mother's day when we were growing up split between her DM and MIL, who didn't get on, so couldn't do a 'group outing' and she hated it. She didn't want me to feel obligated to do the same thing.

I hate Mother's Day.
Having lost both my mum and dd I avoid mother's day except for the usual visit to the cemetery.
Dd2 who is 5 is excited about what she is making in school for mother's day.
I will have to paint a smile on for her sake. The run-up to Mother's Day this year hasn't been too bad probably because of covid.
I'll be glad when it's over

It’s more about MIL and DM for us.
I wake up here with my own dc but then we get ready and have mil and fil here for a lunch and then in the evening I usually either go to my mums or take her and my stepdad out for dinner.
It’s been this way for as long as I can remember! My mum has always been quite high maintenance and would be very disappointed without a fuss, mil is much lower maintenance but so lovely. Either way, it’s one day of the year, it’s nice to spoil them both, they’ve both been good mums to both dh and I and they deserve a nice treat.

Sorry, that was meant to say I usually go to my mums and I’ll order us all a takeaway OR we go out to eat...

It's all about MIL in this house.

One year I gave birth three days before Mother's Day. The day was only mentioned because he forgot to call his mum in the morning as I'd sent him out for painkillers as the hospital had send me home with Jack shit after my section.

When we got married it used to be about mil and myself. We would usually have dinner with mil and sil and a nice lunch out or afternoon tea for me. Now it is more about me, we usually swing by mil's in the afternoon for some tea but I would rather have an evening meal at my own home so I can get the kids tucked into bed by bedtime as I work on a Monday.

I haven't actually spent a mother's day with my mum since I got married and moved away.