I feel so empty

[GuacamoleParty]

Last year I was diagnosed with cancer and has a hysterectomy. I'm in my 30s with one DC, would have loved another.

Sometimes I feel like I've made my peace with having one child, and other days (like today) I feel so so empty and useless. I will literally never be able to have another child, that door has completely closed for me now. It feels so cruel and unfair.

Oh OP I’m so sorry. I have no experience of your situation but can understand that there must be some sort of grief there for a child you hoped to have. Sending a hug.

I’m so sorry op, I’ve not got any advice to offer you in this situation apart from some kind of support if you need to talk. Didn’t want to read and run xxx

But you have a child! How lucky you are. I've never been able to have children, it's ended my marriage and affected my whole adult life. Rejoice and celebrate the wonderful child you have!

Sorry @GuacamoleParty I am a mum to an only child too and I doubt that will change. I am so thankful for my daughter but I do grieve for the bigger family I thought I would have. I'm one of 4 siblings, I thought I'd have a big family too. I have health concerns that make it highly unlikely I'll have any more children.

OP, that’s tough.
You will hear people say the at least you have one, but no-one understands someone else’s position usually without experience.
I have had 2 miscarriages (early) and it meant very little to me, other than disappointment. Other people would be devastated.
But because I’d survived cancer, house fire, childhood abuse, rape etc. It just didn’t impact.
When my first full term pregnancy died, I was bereft. Utterly.
I went on to have a pregnancy later in life and now have a DC. But DD is severely disabled (but wonderful and getting better- probably has CP).
I’m not British. I have no family here. My DH is difficult.
I live every day alone,pretty much, and solely for my DD.
I’m only telling you this because in my thirties, trying for children with my DH who adored me and I had a great job etc... I’m now with same DH, I support him, I get very little in return and my DD is my life (can’t talk/walk/eat). Not everything works out, even if you hadn’t had cancer.
You are brave.
You have a child.
I’m not being mean, just try to remember the good things

Please have counselling. It won’t change your situation but it’ll help you to make peace with it. Which sounds trite, but in reality is wonderful.

I’m so sorry.