Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Some advantages of getting old(er)

54 replies

sneakysnoopysniper · 03/03/2021 12:29

The disadvantages of being older are often discussed in terms of being slower on ones feet, health problems, and so on. However there are some definite advantages to getting older, such as:-

We Have Much Clearer Priorities. As we get older we have the ability to differentiate between our needs and our wants. We have learned that there are things which we cannot control or change. So we tend to concentrate upon what we do have control over.

We Don't Care As Much What Others Think. We come to realise that we have (often) spent our lives pleasing other people and in the time we have left we should be giving more thought to what we want to do. The negative judgements of others mean far less under these circumstances.

We Have Higher Sense of Self-Worth. Our life experiences have taught us how to deal with both failure and success and how to carry on afterwards. We can also be proud of the work we have done (whether paid or in the home) as our contribution to society.

We Can Learn From Our Children and Grandchildren. Our children and grandchildren, who have grown up in this new world with its rapidly changing technology, will have the capability to assist us and fill in any information gaps. We will have taught these individuals the necessities of living, and the skills required to survive, now they will assist us to do the same.

People make allowances for us not conforming to their rules. Older people are almost expected to be a bit slow, eccentric, deaf etc. So when we want to avoid the unpleasant tasks or people we can be selectively deaf, short sighted, forgetful or unable to understand.

Can you think of any other advantages from your point of view? What are your experiences, whether sad or funny?

OP posts:
Laila747 · 03/03/2021 12:33

The confidence to speak my mind, definitely. 10 years ago I would have kept quiet, avoided confrontation and let things be, for a easier life.
Now I feel far more confident in my beliefs and feel I have more ‘lessons from life’ to back them up.
I feel comfortable with who I am and far more at ease to express that.

Thighdentitycrisis · 03/03/2021 12:38

Eyesight starts to fail means we can’t see our wrinkles and receding gums etc so clearly (vanity based I know)😀

Shesheadingonin · 03/03/2021 12:52

Just wanted to say how much I love love love this post! I’m in my mid 40s and agree with every positive point made, certainly in my case already! Feeling v excited at what the future might hold 💐

ravenmum · 03/03/2021 12:53

*It's No Longer Worth Trying to Look Really Attractive". Which frees up plenty of time for gaming, running marathons and breeding prize-winning guinea pigs.

PPNC · 03/03/2021 12:56

I don’t have to pretend to be interested in things or people I’m not.

I don’t sweat the small stuff, I’ve realised everything just carries on, good times and bad times go in cycles and there isn’t much point worrying if little things go wrong, or even big things really as the world keeps turning and joy is there in even small ways in the future.

johnd2 · 03/03/2021 12:56

What a great post, i like your first 4 points! Although the last one is suggesting a bit passive aggressive behaviour, if you know your needs just communicate them clearly!

NeedToGetOuttaHere · 03/03/2021 13:02

You have more time for friends and hopefully have made some really good friends over the years.

RantyAnty · 03/03/2021 13:04

No being constantly harassed in public by men.

I love number 4. I turn my hearing aids off and say fuck it.

ravenmum · 03/03/2021 13:05

Not everyone has children, let alone grandchildren - but we can learn from anyone, at any time of life.

I can't say I support the idea of conforming to the stereotype of older people being slow/unable to understand things, either.

I agree that in some ways you can grow more confident as you age, but I don't think that is universal or applies to every aspect of life. Lacking confidence doesn't mean you've failed at ageing Grin

OccultGnuAsWell · 03/03/2021 13:08

Not feeling pressured to attend social events in the same way.

Not that there are any at the moment but ykwim.

I know myself well enough to know what I do and don't enjoy and can say a guilt free "no thank you".

sneakysnoopysniper · 03/03/2021 20:41

Thanks for your posts. I agree with most of them.

In respect of my last point, sometimes I just cant be bothered explaining to needy people (especially neighbours) that I dont want their company, dont want to get involved, and so on. Rather than be rude or abrupt I just dont answer the door or hear then when they call from across the street.

I once made the mistake of getting over involved with a needy neighbour when I offered to fill in a form for her. I allowed her to get her claws in and soon I was doing her shopping, making her phone calls, and so on as if I was her housekeeper. Now I just shout "I dont have my hearing aid in" which is true because I dont use one. Nor do I wear glasses, except for very close work. I just dont want to be involved in other people's lives. I bloody hate neighbours.

It amuses me when I hear people use pseudo psychological phrases like "passive-aggressive". The more difficult you make it for people to make contact they more likely they are to get off their backsides to find someone else to pester or do it themselves. Ive long ago done my bit for the community.

OP posts:
8090sTv · 03/03/2021 21:15

For me, I have always been really honest and have learned the benefit of a white lie as I get older.

Also, realising that our relationships with each other are what matters (as long as there are respectful boundaries!)

wokeasfuck · 03/03/2021 21:19

Better, less inhibited sex.

AdaFuckingShelby · 03/03/2021 21:25

Invisible to lecherous men, no unwanted pestering.
Comfortable in my own skin.
Wisdom that comes from experience.
Well established boundaries.
It's bliss.

LunaHeather · 04/03/2021 01:51

OP i'm curious to know what age group you are thinking of.

grassisjeweled · 04/03/2021 01:56

Not bending over to please people, I only do what I want to do. My fave line now is 'it's not a priority' and a blank face.

sneakysnoopysniper · 04/03/2021 02:23

My fav line now is "Ill leave it with you then" before I hit the off button on the phone or walk away. Im in my 70s and when time gets shorter I dont want to waste it. My policy is that if I dont enjoy it or it doesnt bring me money or advantage I dont usually do it.

OP posts:
isthismylifenow · 04/03/2021 05:26

Along with many of these, freckles fade........ Grin

SueblueNZ · 04/03/2021 05:36

No more menstrual dramas.

And most of the advantages earlier posters have mentioned.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 04/03/2021 07:03

No longer feeling remotely bad/guilty/a wimp, for saying no thanks to things I know I’m unlikely to enjoy or will scare me shitless - from certain parties to the likes of e.g. white-water rafting. ‘Come on, don’t be such a wimp - you’ll enjoy it!’ (No I bloody won’t!)

Not giving a toss about the ‘latest fashions’ in anything - clothes, kitchens, paint colours, etc.

happytoday73 · 04/03/2021 07:07

... Its better than the alternative

ItIsntVienna · 04/03/2021 07:30

We Can Learn From Our Children and Grandchildren. Our children and grandchildren, who have grown up in this new world with its rapidly changing technology, will have the capability to assist us and fill in any information gaps. We will have taught these individuals the necessities of living, and the skills required to survive, now they will assist us to do the same.

These individuals????? !!!!!

LApprentiSorcier · 04/03/2021 07:33

We Can Learn From Our Children and Grandchildren

I don't have any, so this doesn't resonate with me. However, an advantage of getting older is that people stop asking you when you're going to have children once you are clearly past the age when it would be possible.

lljkk · 04/03/2021 07:58

I don't relate to what OP wrote, but I have a different set of benefits. mid 50s.

I don't need to have an opinion. I can leave others to change & improve the world. They can fix or improve the situation, I did and do my bits.

I can leave things I don't like Turn off the radio, abandon a book. Others can be persistent. I can't be arsed.

I can stop trying I have tried to do xyz for decades. It's ok to decide now that I utterly hate it & I don't feel any need to acquire that skill now or learn to get better at that. I can just know it doesn't suit me & move on.

Easier to admit I'm wrong and not care if I've embarrassed myself. Easier to laugh at myself. I'm more comfortable saying "I don't know". Since I've nothing to lose by looking foolish, I can just try new things if I fancy.

To be honest, it was a joy when sexual harrassment stopped, too. Woohoo! Just be me now. Get perceived as non-threatening so easy to approach random people if they need help.

665TheNeighbourOfTheBeast · 04/03/2021 08:09

Lack of shame about all sorts of things. Bodily functions and failures. Money, or lack of it. Behaviour. Asking for what I actually want, even when it's inconvenient. Enjoying the journey as much, if not more than the getting somewhere.
Also being at peace with not being a "significant" person and enjoying my own quite small world.

Swipe left for the next trending thread