I need some harsh words

[weightobsession]

I alongside most found myself carrying a few extra pounds during lockdown 1

I started moving more and watching my snacks

I've lost the extra pounds and quite a few more, I feel almost obsessed with being active and what I'm eating.

Rationally I know I'm slightly underweight but the irrational me is enjoying the control I have over it.

I'm weighing daily and if there is even a slight increase I'm cutting back and moving more.

I need someone to shake me please and give me some helpful advice before this gets to a point I can't stop it

Hopeful bump

You have recognised it might be a worry so I think you are in a good position to get control.
Get rid of the scales for a start.

Yer being a dick.

Put the scales in the bin.

Speak to people... online /therapy etc.

You can do it xx

Yes, bin the scales.

Do a weekly meal plan which you know if nutritionally good, provides adequate calories and eat those meals. Try to stop seeing as food and weight but your body and fuel.

What about starting a different form of excel is like Pilates, less about weight loss, more about changing your body and toning.

Ultimately, sounds like you are enjoying the control as other things feel out of control. Find something to replace that, many people get similar feelings from clearing out their house and organising everything.

Why do you think you are enjoying controlling your weight? Is there an area of your life that feels out of control? Would talking to someone about that help do you think?

I’d be very careful about not losing more weight if you are already underweight. You don’t want to end up with osteoporosis or infertility and in more superficial terms it’s not great for your skin or hair either.

Practically, is there something else you could switch your focus to? A hobby? Yoga or Pilates? I’d try to limit weighing yourself to once a week if you can.

My wonderful cousin has been battling anorexia for 20 years and sadly it has prevented her having a family. She also has some long term health conditions from depriving her body for so many years.

I’d walk it back now. You need to look after your body, we only get one.

Stop weighing daily. Ideally, get rid of the scales. Watching what you eat and keeping active must be enough to keep you in shape, especially if you are already underweight.

Being underweight was the most unhealthy I've ever been in my life. I couldn't stand up for long in hot weather, I froze in the cold. My hot/cold thresholds were way below/above most people. Stopped being able to exercise as I was too weak. Too weak to do most things in fact. Slept excessively but was always tired. My skin went extremely dry, gaunt face, lined looking, pale, skin always looked awful, aged me terribly. Hair fell out, it's growing back now I've started to recover and I can see I'd lost a lot more than I had realised. Nails break off. No clothes fit me, no breasts or hips to speak of, didn't feel like a woman. I began to struggle for breath and suffered regular heart palpitations. Bit by bit I felt as though my body was breaking down.

Regaining the weight back is not easy after years of starvation. I am having to eat around 3000 calories a day to gain weight because most of the calories are being used to repair my body. It's been very slow progress. I have had digestive issues because my body isn't used to food - constipation, bloating, really bad gas - fortunately these are easing off now but it's taken a while. Night sweats, extreme fatigue after every meal. Having to eat and eat and eat to put on a pound. At the start I needed to have extra electrolytes because my body wasn't coping with the sudden increase in food. But it's getting easier and I'm starting to really enjoy the feeling of being hungry and then eating something and then feeling satisfied afterwards. I enjoy thinking about all the vitamins and minerals and other good things I'm giving to my body, and I enjoy seeing my skin start to look healthier and my hair and nails recovering and having the energy to stand up and walk around and do things.

I know I may have been a bit more extreme than you were, but it can be a slippery slope. I feel worried sometimes about inside my body and what kind of strain I've put it all under. I hope I can make up for it now. Knowing what I know now, if I had to pick I'd rather be slightly overweight than slightly underweight. I think it is healthier.

Thank you to you all for giving me advice.

I think it's partly due to how tough this last year has been, everything has been out with my control.

I initially just enjoyed the high from being active and slowly noticed I was cutting out more meals, having smaller portions and then not feeling very hungry.

I am 5ft 6 and weigh 8st 5lbs so not super skinny but I look quite gaunt.

Eating now feels hard to do, I get full super quick.

I also need to be active or I start to feel quite low in mood.

For your height I think you must be on the lower end of a healthy weight and could probably do with gaining a few pounds?

Honestly op, being underweight has been so bad for me. It didn't take much for me to get really ill. I was doing ok at a low weight mostly (besides the problems I mentioned with my hair, skin and nails plus generally looking shit). Then I got a stomach bug that would have been fine for most people, but I ended up severely dehydrated and had to go to hospital. I drank loads of water btw, but I was too weak to handle it. I have done so much reading on the different reasons our body needs calories and various nutrients, it really encourages me to eat well. I think you should start trying to make a few changes and think about food in terms of looking after yourself and what your body needs. Sorry if that's not helpful, I just had no idea the damage I'd done to myself. It was actually stress behind my inital lack of eating rather than a desire to be slim, but I slipped into ED territory quite quickly.