Do you have a secret slush fund?

[Sfuandtired]

I recently started a small fund out of a bonus I got from work £500, it's just there to use if anything comes up, I didn't put it in the joint account DH would have seen it as an opportunity for it to be spent on something, for context £500 is half a months wages for me and less than a weeks wages for DH, but that's a whole other thread.
Anyway I reason for posting is that a friend was very surprised that I was only just doing this and hadn't already done so, stating every women has one of these funds, so I thought I'd ask on here to see if that really is the case?

We keep our savings separate, it's no indication of our marriage being on the rocks, but it does mean neither of us is staying in the marriage because we can't afford to leave, 2hich I think is a healthier way to be. Big purchases ie home refurb and holidays are paid for by whichever of us is the driving force behind the project from our savings, very rarely do we split something in half. It's just evolved this way and neither of us are doing anything to change it

Yes, I have separate money, no it's not a secret.
He doesn't know how much is in them, I don't give him a running total, if he wanted to know he could just ask but he's not bothered.

I have a separate savings account and so does DH but they're not secrets. They're both empty right now, covid has taken its toll.

We both work, when we get paid we put in a set amount into the joint account to cover mortgage, food shopping, nursery fees and bills.
We then have our own bank accounts for our own disposable cash. I've got £20k in savings in mine. He has about the same as we both get paid similar amounts. I like the fact my account has my money in it and it's my choice what it gets spent on. If the £40k was in a joint account I think we'd view it differently and actively spend it on house / holidays. I'd not enjoy only one shared account as occasionally I want a holiday with friends or to splurge and it would feel a little off to pull money out of the joint account and I'd feel that I would need an explanation. The way I do it I don't owe anyone an explanation.
To note our private accounts and saving pots are not secret and would be pooled and shared if ever needed

Anyway I reason for posting is that a friend was very surprised that I was only just doing this and hadn't already done so, stating every women has one of these funds, so I thought I'd ask on here to see if that really is the case

What do you think? Seriously? In what world would that ever be true?

I do. But it’s not totally secret. Dh just has no idea how much is in there.

My aim is to build it up so I have 3 months nursery and mortgage payments In there. Just in case.