So now my neighbours object to us fencing off our land

[Reluctantwitness]

Our neighbours asked a few years ago to remove the rickety unpleasant fence between us. We said yes. They planted a climber with a bit of wire at 4 ft which might solve the problem in 10 years. Meanwhile though we are completely eye to eye with their extension. It’s about 6 foot from their picture window to the boundary so it’s very awkward.
I avoid being in that area of the garden because I feel I am intruding into their family life by being there. And they are able to make direct eye contact if I try to do some gardening. Essentially there are people sitting at their dining table within 6/8 ft or so.

My husband wanted to put up a 2m privacy fence but I knew that would be the nasty for the neighbours because of blocking light.

I therefore told them I intended to replace the fence, at my own expense and on my own land. have agreed to have solid fence at 3ft with about 2ft 4 inches diamond trellis above.

They are objecting still......it’s pretty annoying......

The fencing company guy left today without giving a quote because the neighbour came over and involved in the discussion (I had given them warning as a courtesy).

Is it time to just shut this down and say “we are not asking a favour, we are going to fence off our land as is our right”.... I know we all get precious about our gardens and views but I have given them notice, am designing the bloody thing for their benefit and have had enough.

Don’t feel like you are intruding. In fact walk about that part of the garden naked.

Why did the fencing guy leave without quoting? Was your neighbour appearing to be in dispute?

If you’re being reasonable about style etc then of course you’re entitled to do what you like. You’re entitled to do what you like on your land regardless of whether you’re reasonable, in fact, as long as you keep within the law!

:)
That would be mean and I like their cute children- little munchkins!

To get this straight... They've built an extension which comes close to the boundary, with a window. They want no fence by that window (I'm guessing for light).
You want a fence for privacy.

Squirrels yes. He said “well I’ve got 16 more quotes to do - I’m off”

Around - yes though the extension is not new it’s been there for ever

Since when did you need neighbours permission to put a normal size fence up in your own garden?

I second the first response, get your husband to cut the grass is nothing but an apron.

Id tell em to go jump and put the fence up
If they want light, turn one on

Yeah, just put up whatever fence you choose within your own boundary. Eventually their climber will disguise it and meanwhile you reclaim your garden. I’m sure it’s much nicer for them to look at your garden than it is for you to look at their extension, so they’re not being remotely reasonable and no further discussion required.

You know when you get trapped in a situation and you wait too long before saying anything? It’s like that.

Their arguments:
1 the original fence didn’t stretch that far
2 we asked x (our tenant!) and they didn’t think it was necessary

I’d post 2 styles of fencing through their door - 1) your proposal and 2) your DH’s proposal (choose the ugliest tall fence possible). Say you’re currently happy to put up 1) but if they continue to object then you’ll have to think seriously about your DH’s preferred choice of 2).

I’d just put up a 2m fence.

My friend had a situation like this. She felt obliged to chat to them when in the garden and didn’t feel they had any privacy. They put a 6’ fence up, despite the neighbour objecting. The neighbour hasn’t spoken to them since, but they’ve enjoyed their own garden much more for 15 years!

What pisses me off most is that I gave notice the fence guy was coming and we agreed I’d come back to them after the meeting.

But no, they had to come and involve themselves and chase fencing guy off.

We put a 6 foot fence just within the original fence and just told our neighbours what we were doing. They dont speak to us. We have an extension - built well before we moved in - which is about 1 foot from the boundary and they had removed the fence panels that went alongside our extension and were storing their firewood against our extension wall (cheeky bastards). I’d asked them last year not to store wood against the wall as it could cause damp - they ignored me. Anyway, when the fencer came we were in the back discussing what we wanted and I said I wanted the fence to go all the way along to the back wall, alongside the extension. I did point out that as it would have to be done by getting permission form the neighbour to access it from their garden, that might not happen. He said that according to regulations, they cant refuse access for us to make repairs on out property. Suddenly up popped the neighbour, who had been standing at her back door listening to us! She invited him (not me) into her garden to measure up the fence!!
We’ve had a vertical slatted fence erected, which is about 4 inches higher than the original fence at one end but 12 inches at the other, as the garden is on a slope.
Put the fence that you want up. Once its up, you wont be able to see them moaning about it!!

Just put a fence up on your land. I wouldn't be discussing with them further. The one you have described sounds a good compromise. If they dont like the way it looks they can grow something up it. Honeysuckle is quick, I covered a fence in a year or 2.

Surely they dont want you looking in their window?! You certainly shouldn't feel bad to use that part of your own garden.

“I’d just put up a 2m fence.”

Tempting, but it’s only a 3metre stretch so it would be rather disprortionate.

I'm not sure you can go 2m without permission (?), but I would either just crack on with you plan or, if you want to maintain some semblance of friendly relations, explain that whilst you need privacy, you are mindful of their comments, so would they prefer a solid fence to the max permitted height or the trellis option.

Yes it’s time to shut it down. You tried to be polite.

Unfortunately they have a right of way across our garden further down so I would like to be clear but not break off relations.

I’ve had a neighbour in the past who was vicious. This family is just sharp-elbowed.

Just do it. When I moved in to one house I made it clear to both neighbours I was putting a fence up all round my garden to keep the dog in, and stop her from barking when out in the garden as there were only small chain link fences

One fine, one not happy, but tough I did it, my garden my fence

How close to their window would the fence be?

Endless - about 2m, that’s why I’m prepared to keep it lower and use diamond trellis - it wouldn’t be my choice

Could you just do trellis at that end and a full height fence elsewhere (with a gate for where they need access - and you know they will use that access now!)

Further away from the house Honey (past their gate) we have a low fence that we agreed with their predecessors. And that’s fine, there is more planting.
gardening alongside each other peacefully is different from being outside their window.