Self help books that changed your life

[MistakenAgain]

Idle musings - what 'self help' book have you read that ' changed your life' and why

I'll start

Families and How to survive them by John Cleese- first confirmation that my family might be dysfunctional . DM must have had an inkling as she bought the book

Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway- this was THE self help classic - is it still? Waltzed into work feeling all confident, for about an hour .

The Only way to give up smoking Alan Carr - thought I was the only person who could not quit smoking, no turns out I was brainwashed into thinking this, nicotine is out of your system in 48 hours and the rest is habit. On reflection I think this oversimplifies brain chemistry/addiction/reward pathways but it set me on the path to (finally) quitting 6 years later

The element - not really a self help book but Ken Robinsons seminal book on finding your passion and how modern education doesn't quite encourage creativity enough. Quite cathartic.

Stephen Coveys Seven Habits - so sensible and such a good way to live

The Dirty Diet. Bloody brilliant.

Fat is a Feminist Issue by Susie Orbach when I was a very unhappy student with bulimia. Changed the way I saw the whole world and my place in it.

Gifts of imperfection by Brene Brown
Brene Brown in general has changed my life. Her ted talks are an accessible introduction

You can Heal Your Life by Louise L Hay : www.amazon.co.uk/You-Can-Heal-Your-Life/dp/0937611018/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&s=books&crid=39R4FMADG59AK&keywords=louise+hay+you+can+heal+your+life&sprefix=louise+hay%2Cinstant-video%2C201&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1614201446&sr=1-1

@MistakenAgain if you are on Instagram, I highly recommend you follow @aneed2read. Ed Cunningham recommends books for various situations and he has a podcast too that has book reviews on. Some of the popular ones are:
Awareness by Anthony Demello
The Daily Stoic
Mindset by Carol Dweck
Happiness Trap by Russ Harris

I haven't read but listened to the audibles of Brian Tracy no excuses
Make your bed by William McRaven
And the classic how to win friends and influence people...

All have good points but you have to remember that many self help books are written by American authors and are aimed at the American demographic, that's not to say we can't apply things from it in our own lives but I did find the book by William McRaven although had some good points, he was an ex American seal and he was looking at things from the eyes of an American patriot.

But some of what is said in the books can be apply universally, other things might not always work so well out of the USA.

Another one is the subtle art of not giving a f*. It has some good points in it too especially about our lives today.

But I have personally found with self help books, you can read all of them but ultimately the only way you will get results in your own life is taking action in your life to chance things.

At the moment we are living through strange times too, and just remember getting through each day right now is a miracle when so much of the things we enjoy in life have been restricted, so if you do read a few self help books but are not ready to take action, don't feel bad about yourself too.

My best self help book is 'How to keep house while drowning'. I've mentioned it on a thread on here before but strongly recommend anyone who has Kindle Unlimited to read it.

It's all about unassociating household tasks with morals, so no more thinking unless I do xyz then I'm a bad person. Household work has no moral value so you should try to change your way of thinking. Instead of I'm useless unless I clean the kitchen from top to bottom, try thinking well done me, I cleared enough space to safely cook a nice meal.

Obviously the author explains it much better than I have, but I've managed to do more cleaning and tidying since reading it as it has helped me take the pressure of myself

I read a book once about being single and finding someone. When I finished the book I met and married dh with 16 months. Will try to recall the name.

'The power of now' by Eckhart Tolle.
Changed my life. Turned me from a pessimist to optimist, truly became a glass-half-full person. Taught me that happiness ain't at the end of the road; happiness IS the road

10% Happier (annoyingly I now can’t remember the author’s name!) Dan Harris maybe? Anyway, it helped me to meditate when Calm and Headspace and other books and apps couldn’t. It is very funny as well, which I like.

A Course In Miracles. There are a lot of associated texts, Marriane Williamson’s Return to Love for example. But the principle is the same. Love it.

Am also absolutely LOVING Glennon Doyle’s Untamed. Fabulous stuff.

The Gift of Fear. Gavin de Becker.

Get Rich, Lucky Bitch, by Denise Duffield-Thomas. Took me from earning a pittance to earning six figures. I don't know how it works but it does!

I stopped doing all the stuff in it after my life spectacularly imploded and, guess what, I got poor again, so I'm re-reading it and implementing everything again. If I can do it once, I can do it again!

(It's essentially the power of positive thinking and then taking action but written in a nice informal style, and it really does work).

7 habits by Stephen Covey - as pp said it's sensible and actionable.
Marie Kondo's tidying book - can't remember the title, but my stuff has remained organised for a couple of years now. My drawers are a thing of beauty.

Also the 4 hour work week by Tim Ferris. Helped me develop and streamline online business systems that have very much reduced the number of hours I need to work.

@Pippin2028

"And the classic how to win friends and influence people..."

That's the book that heavily influenced Donald trump so not sure I'd be recommending that to anyone.

Yeah but Trump is a massive bellend and yet made it to the White House so based on results for the book, it’s a win!

athenajm80 thank you for recommending How To Keep House While Drowning. I had seen it recommended on here before but not sure it that was also you. I bought it on Kindle, read it in a day (good job it is so short so there is time to read it), looked at the website and some of the videos. It made sense, and I intend to read it again because I think it will take more than one quick read to take on board the message that is the opposite to what I have been telling myself for decades. I am sceptical of books that claim to change your life, but it might help me accept myself as I am a bit more and that could be life-changing.