Did forebears of yours live in a grand country pile?

[Timpeall]

Be it a Highclere Castle type affair, a minor country estate in Somerset, maybe some kind of Tudor manor house.

I'm watching The Little Stranger which is set post-WWII and shows a family who can very much not afford to keep the family seat going. It's all dust and decay and slogging away doing their own cooking and cleaning.* God, it's so depressing watching these people in their ramshackle home with the days of former splendour still in living memory. They don't have so much as a ladies maid to throw a hairbrush at anymore.

And I know these houses could only exist for so long because they were able to exploit their servants by paying them two shillings and thrupence and only giving them a half Sunday's holiday every six weeks. But it's still quite poignant.

And then I thought, there must be lots of people living in nice comfy four bed semi-detached houses whose ancestors at some point lived in some seriously impressive gaffs. Do they have framed sepia pictures of the old ancestral pile on the wall?

*These poor buggers also have the added hassle of some ghostly demon.

@springdale1

I am an Estate Manager so live and work on such an estate in a grace and favour home.

A huge amount of estates were demolished in the 50s, literally thousands. People couldn’t afford the upkeep, sons had been killed in the war and death duties were crippling. They were either demolished or handed over to the National Trust.

Must be a fascinating job.

It was thinking about all the homes that were knocked after WWII that made me think that there must be loads of people a couple of generations away from the life of the landed gentry. Must have been a wrench to be the last of the line to say 'let's knock it' if the National Trust had no interest in taking it on. Some who came after must be relieved not to have such a millstone around their necks but there must be others who think 'if only...'

@ShowMeTheWayToAmarillo

No - but slightly unusual story which we don't know the full picture of. My father was born out of wedlock which in the 1930s would have been seen as not appropriate. She was in service and apparently the house she worked at tried very hard to persuade her for them to look after and adopt her child. She kept him and he was baptised (unusual) as very often the children of unmarried mothers were turned away.). We don't know the full picture of who my genetic grandfather actually was - but I think it was connected to the house that she worked in. My grandmother died not revealing who my father's father was. It saddens him to this day.

Your poor Dad. It is sad for him not to know the full circumstances of his birth. There must have been so many maids who got pregnant by the master or one of the sons of the house. Trying to avoid the attentions of a lecherous Lord must have been pretty common.

@natalienewname

Yes on my father's side one reliable gambled it all away on cards. Left penniless, house and contents taken for the debt.

Bet his wife and kids were really pleased.

My MIL's family has been v rich industrialist types, but her branch has always been second sons or the not quite so successful ones. But, there is a large 7 figure trust fund apparently and she's now living on that.

Dissolute earls gambling the lot away on a game of cards seems to have been a theme. What an almighty 'oh fuck' moment that must have been.

My grandma's cousin was steward at Harewood in the interwar years if that counts as family living in a grand house?

No, poor as church mice and still are compared to many on here. But a friend's parents do. Big country estate, titles etc. Must be nice to be loaded....and even nicer to inherit!

Yes, one side was close to a medieval King and was given large amounts of land until it was stolen from them in a heir dispute 500 years ago and the other side were landed gentry until the second World War when they disagreed with a political party and were stripped of the land and money plus some feld the country.
My family are poor now

My mother’s family owned a huge Victorian stately home in Scotland until the 1920s when the money ran out. It was demolished in the 1950s and there’s a factory there now.

Yes - she worked in the kitchens 😁

DM's family owned a large house (9 bedrooms) in a naice part of Surrey from just after the war to the early 2000s. It's worth a fortune now but her DB was an absolute bastard and managed to get his claws on it when their parents died and my DM ended up with nothing. Cost her an arm and a leg in legal fees to contest the will and she's still bitter about it now.

The rest of my ancestors are mostly salt of the earth working class folk some were actually quite upwardly mobile and did quite well in life. There are a couple of pawnbrokers on my DF's side who did very well for themselves and retired to a big house on Jersey before WW. Family legend is that the family silver was buried in the garden to stop the German's getting in when they invaded. I have no idea if this is true or not!

If you go far enough back (like 1600s) then yes.

But really my family has always been solidly professional classes - vicars, lawyers, doctors. My great grandmother made a lot of money & bought her own stately home in the 1920s, but disinherited my grandfather so it didn’t stay in the family. I don’t think my grandfather would have been able to manage the upkeep anyway.

My grandmother was raised in a property that now belongs to the NT. She was posh, and wealthy but not mega so. My parents inherited enough to have a lovely house, two other flats and have a good life, but they still work. DH and I have a nice, end of terrace house. We have benefitted in so much as my parents paid for our expensive for us wedding (£20k) and have helped a bit with house costs (another 20k). But we are have mortgage and work. Basically each generation has less. But still fortunate and grateful.

Nope I am from unskilled peasant stock

Great-grandfather had a nice big country house. Unfortunately it happened to be in the way of the advancing Russian troops in 1945 and all the left was a big pile of ash. Grandma (she is about to have her 103rd birthday) is still quite bitter about it. She fled with three small children and a few suitcases on top of a wagon.

Ooh forgot to add that we visited the property and one of the guides in the kitchen made a comment about how if we have lived then we would be working in the kitchen. DH raised an eyebrow at me, but I didn't correct them!

@Bestbees

Ooh forgot to add that we visited the property and one of the guides in the kitchen made a comment about how if we have lived then we would be working in the kitchen. DH raised an eyebrow at me, but I didn't correct them!

You should have said 'If this were 1930 I'd have you horse whipped, you impudent pleb!'

DD has spent lockdown on Ancestry and our family tree now has 7k people on it. She's found several kings and an emperor - and quite a few stately home residers.

However, much of the family has lived in abject poverty, the details of which would make you weep.

I think most of us would find some 'fancy' ancestors, especially as these are better documented, but as most people in history have been poor, most ancestors have been poor too. Life is generally much getter these days

My dad’s side of the family lived in a string of gorgeous country estates until about the 1930s. They clearly enjoyed themselves because we never inherited any of the spoils! We had lots of photos and mementos handed down though.

I’m an architectural historian and as a weird coincidence I was hired to research one of my family’s old homes by its new owner about five years ago. I’d seen lots of family pictures of the place but had never been inside, and it was GREAT to finally gain full access! It’s a huge, beautiful Jacobean hall with loads of parkland and estate buildings. The new owners bought it for about £12mil. If I ever win Euromillions I shall attempt to buy it back..

@DoubleHelix79

Great-grandfather had a nice big country house. Unfortunately it happened to be in the way of the advancing Russian troops in 1945 and all the left was a big pile of ash. Grandma (she is about to have her 103rd birthday) is still quite bitter about it. She fled with three small children and a few suitcases on top of a wagon.

Oh wow, your grandmother must have had quite a life! I hope someone has taken down all her stories and kept it for future generations.

@DrCoconut

My grandma's cousin was steward at Harewood in the interwar years if that counts as family living in a grand house?

Definitely!

I've just googled Harewood. Now that's a house and a half!

@GidgetGirl

My dad’s side of the family lived in a string of gorgeous country estates until about the 1930s. They clearly enjoyed themselves because we never inherited any of the spoils! We had lots of photos and mementos handed down though.

I’m an architectural historian and as a weird coincidence I was hired to research one of my family’s old homes by its new owner about five years ago. I’d seen lots of family pictures of the place but had never been inside, and it was GREAT to finally gain full access! It’s a huge, beautiful Jacobean hall with loads of parkland and estate buildings. The new owners bought it for about £12mil. If I ever win Euromillions I shall attempt to buy it back..

Oh wow! That is a coincidence. Lovely for you to have had the opportunity to get inside it and explore. Must have been a strange sensation to walk its halls. Did you feel a connection to it?

Yes granny did but her dad died in ww1 so it went to her Cousin due to the male hier thing. He kept her until she married as was the done thing. So she summered in her childhood home and was at boarding school.

Haha, no. My grandmother's hobby was tracing family history and we've always been paupers.

Yes.
A branch of the family still live in it. If women inherited at the time it would have gone to my great grandmother, but instead it went to her younger brother. It feels a bit weird thinking how different their lives were purely due to inheritance laws. My close relatives are all still reasonably wealthy but on nowhere near the same scale.

It’s not true that there’s always money that goes with the house and land. You have to make them pay - even Highclere still hosts weddings. If you’re not very entrepreneurial it’s a massive strain not just on finances but mental health and family relationships.

The relationship between you and the land and the people is also very intense - both symbiotic and toxic. Two of my ancestors took their own lives, and many are addicts.

No, were come from a long line of serfs!