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Inconsiderate neighbours/Harassment

8 replies

Taurini · 09/02/2021 18:57

We have been living in our new house around 10 months now and it has been awful..

The fence here is old and we are not able to replace it due to money and saving for our baby that is on the way.
We have a dog, the first day we moved in and let our dog out the neighbours dog smashed its head through the fence trying to get to ours. We have had to push our bins against the fence to stop it getting through. In summer they left their backdoor open all day, so i couldnt let my dog out without theirs smashing against the fence again. At one point i was fed up and decided it wasnt fair mine being in all day so i took my dog out to play and just ignored theirs the best i could.. their dog broke through a fence pannel onto my front garden and then kept trying to smash through our gate. I eventually had to go knock on my neighbours door and tell them their dog got out and their response was "oh it doesnt like other dogs" and took it back in.
Now its colder and their back door isnt open as often we check to make sure it is closed before letting ours out. Ours runs in circles for the first 2 mins whilst barking in excitement at the fact he has finally been let out, their dog hears as they always have their kitchen window open, it starts barking, so they toss it out.. resulting in their dog smashing into the fence more.
Their eldest son is about 18ish.. one night when fetching washing in for me the fella could hear him constantly booting a ball at the fence, his mum shouted out for him to stop kicking it at the fence for him to reply "i dont give sh*t, its there side" and continued.. she did nothing.

They also leave months worth of dog poop on their back garden and it stinks.

At times they have the music on full blast with their windows open, so much i can hear it whilst mine are closed.
People are constantly coming and going to the house all through the day and night and they arent quiet about it. (this is all during lockdown)
They have yelled at each other on the street at 3am some mornings waking me and my children up.
Our household doesnt smoke, but when we moved in i noticed lots of fag ends outside on the back and front yard, mainly near the fence.. i assumed the person who lived here before smoked.. i spent most of one morning clearing them all up and was very thorough.. about a month or so later i noticed they had reappeared.. about 50 of them..next door smoke..

I just tried to let this wash over me and not affect me.. but then one day when walking downstairs i saw a little black bag outside the window of my door.. i opened my door to find a poo bag full of dog poo..this took me over the edge..due to lock down, not being able to vent my frustration to family and friends and being 15 weeks pregnant with severe morning sickness whilst homeschooling.. i posted a picture of the poo bag and its location on my facebook and wrote how its one thing to toss fag ends over someones fence but poo is another & wrote how im sick selfish of inconsiderate people etc.. i mentioned no names..its all private.. i have 60ish friends.. but its a small town and they eventually heard what i put..
Their eldest son came to my door asking if i had been "btching about them on facebook.. i said i wrote that i was fed up of finding fag ends and poop on my garden yes but no names.
He then got very aggressive, started yelling and swearing at me.
His mum was the other side of the fence, stating its not them as they only smoke on the back, which my response was i find them there too.. she said they use a pot, and use one here too (pointing to one on the front even though she said they didnt smoke there)
She said if the poo bag is theres it got there by accident..(which is impossible due to the fact the weight and gravity wouldnt make it fly over a fence and land outside of someones door)
eventually they left.

The reason i never went to their door to talk about the things bothering me was because i suffer from anxiety and the police have been over at there's before, when someone dropped a birthday card through our door they called us and told us the police said to the man next door someone is thinking of pressing charges against him, he just shrugged and went inside.. so they're an aggressive family and i do like confrontation.

I then got a camera doorbelll so that it would hopefully deter this from happening or at least help me gain evidence its them and so i dont have to answer if they knock on my door again as they are aggressive.

They obviously were not happy about the doorbell camera as 3 days later they also went and put one up and whilst doing it the man that lives there stared straight at mine with this huge grin whilst ringing his and laughing.

I feel like i cant do a thing to protect my property without feeling harassed or that it will have repercussions.. does anyone have any advice? am i being too sensitive about all this? I thought i would feel all happy finally owning our own home but it has been awful.

OP posts:
user1471538283 · 09/02/2021 21:10

This sounds absolutely awful. I think you have 2 choices, either to report them until something is done or move both of which are stressful. Do your neighbours own their home? If they rent it might be easier as you can complain to the landlord as well.

I hope your Council are more effective than ours is and if the police are already aware they might be able to do something.

I've had awful neighbours and it destroys your mental health. I just dont understand why people can't just live side by side. I know I'm never ever having anything to do with neighbours again.

littlecrocodiles · 09/02/2021 21:54

You can contact your local council about the noise and dog poo. Both would be considered a nuisance. You need the Environmental Health dept, have a look at their website as they usually ask you to complete diary sheets (for noise nuisance) first.

Taurini · 10/02/2021 07:55

I did contact the council but after my neighbours came to the door all aggressive I asked them to just keep it on record and not do anything for now, I have 2 young children and don't want things to get worse.
I'm still waiting for the diary sheets they said they will send out too.
Would the police do anything? My brother said unless I get a photo of them physically doing anything they will do nothing.
Theyre clever and toss things over the tall parts of my fence and I don't have cctv covering that yet.
No doubt they will get cctv if I do, which makes me laugh as me and my partner are introverts and barely leave the house anyway. All they're going to get is them constantly coming and going and other ppl coming and going. They are completely ignoring lock down and I swear they're dealing something, they're very dodgy.

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ThatDamnKrampus · 10/02/2021 08:29

The police cant do anything without proof. Our neighbours have slashed our tyres, gone into my husbands work and verbally abused him, we have had our car egged and regularly get threats and abuse shouted through the wall. Without evidence nothing can be done - even with evidence all they get told is to wind their neck in (there were witnesses to the verbal abuse incident and he gave an excuse to the pcso that he felt cornered (someone, not me had made a safeguarding report to the police) so apparently that is ok Sad

We are trying to move because our mental health is at breaking point. I wouldn't complain because it doesn't help- just move if you can. Flowers

Taurini · 10/02/2021 09:28

That's awful I'm so sorry, unfortunately we can't move.. we have only been here about 10 months and have a baby on the way.
I really can't understand why people can't just be decent.. I mean like.. who throw poo and fag ends over their neighbours fence?! Its disgusting. I'm thinking of joining a neighbour hood watch group here or something.

OP posts:
Saz12 · 10/02/2021 09:44

OP, honestly they won’t change in personality or attitude.

But, you have to start going round and speaking to them about dog poo, fag ends, fence football, etc. Posting on FB was never going to go well.

Although for me, moving would be the long term solution, even if it fucks up your finances and you end up somewhere smaller.

73kittycat73 · 10/02/2021 10:24

@Taurini

That's awful I'm so sorry, unfortunately we can't move.. we have only been here about 10 months and have a baby on the way. I really can't understand why people can't just be decent.. I mean like.. who throw poo and fag ends over their neighbours fence?! Its disgusting. I'm thinking of joining a neighbour hood watch group here or something.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. I have the neighbours from hell too. I just wonder what motivates people like this? Do they get up in the morning and think, 'Today I'm going to do X/Y/Z to them!' I would keep up with recording everything and environmental health, that's what we did in the end. Good luck! Flowers
Taurini · 10/02/2021 11:10

There's no point going around because they just get all denial and then get aggressive. They start swearing at me and everything.
When I mentioned the fag ends that I'm having to constantly clear up they're adamant it's not them, even though we don't smoke, it's down the side of the fence they're on the other side of & they appear on my bag garden too.. when my gate is bolted. There's no one else it could be.

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