Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

Organ Donation- thank you

24 replies

Mangotastic · 09/02/2021 18:26

I have name changed for this to protect my family’s privacy.

There’s a family somewhere in the North East who lost someone today. I don’t know their name or sex, but I know that they were young, and died before their time. The family made the incredible decision to donate their loved one’s organs.

Because of this, a man in his prime will get to live his life free from pain and restriction, and be able to bring his son up as actively as he wants. A four year old boy will get his daddy back.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I am overwhelmed by your courage, kindness and generosity at a time when your hearts must be breaking. I am so, so sorry for your loss. My family will remember you with love and gratitude forever.

OP posts:

IthinkIm · 09/02/2021 18:27

Oh that's made me teary

Redshoeblueshoe · 09/02/2021 18:31

thinking of both families x

Onceuponawish · 09/02/2021 18:32

We donated my sons organs, all I know is that he helped four people. Reading your post has given me a kind of peace I didn't expect but then I'm many years into this journey. Hold your partner tight he has the ultimate love of another family holding him tight as well.

Miranda15110 · 09/02/2021 18:32

Such an incredible thing to do. I have never understood why you wouldn't donate x

Onceuponawish · 09/02/2021 18:35

@Miranda15110

Such an incredible thing to do. I have never understood why you wouldn't donate x

I can, I won't derail but its a massive decision that changes how you say goodbye, and you do it all for strangers.

hopsalong · 09/02/2021 18:37

Very touching to read this.

We spent a long time waiting for a donor for my father. In the end he became too sick and was taken off the list. I know my mother went to bed every night praying for a phone call, but of course it was awful to think that one would come only if someone else, almost certainly younger, had died prematurely.

SakuraEdenSwan1 · 09/02/2021 18:38

This is such a lovely post, I wish your family well, it's such a bitter sweet moment but I'm sure the grieving family will take comfort knowing their loved one helped another today.

ShirleyPhallus · 09/02/2021 18:38

@Onceuponawish

So sorry for your loss

and yes the op made me tear up too, pleased for you in a bittersweet way OP

DeadButDelicious · 09/02/2021 18:39

I very often think of my mums donor and the wonderful thing they and their family did for us.

Thinking of both families today. All the love.

Zarinea · 09/02/2021 19:07

I'm so glad for you (but sad for the other family).

I hope others see this and consider signing up. It's so important.

CormoranStrike · 09/02/2021 19:10

This is beautiful x

Thank you to all donor families.

HaHaVeryBunny · 09/02/2021 19:20

Thanks for raising the topic OP and showing the human side of how life changing organ donations is.

It's the best outcome to a tragic situation.
Saw a post yesterday of a lady who had gone to full term with her baby, knowing that the child would die shortly after her giving birth, she decided that the babies organs were to be donated.
The story stood out as it was one of the youngest organ donations in the world.
A true credit to humanity.

HaHaVeryBunny · 09/02/2021 19:27

Also to add, thanks to who have their loved ones organs donated.

Original poster

Mangotastic · 09/02/2021 19:32

Thank you so much, @Onceuponawish, for what you did and for your good wishes. The recipient is a close relative of mine, not my partner. Thank you everyone for your thoughts and kindness.

I’d just like to be very clear that I think every situation is different, and I absolutely support every family’s and individual’s right to make their own decisions and would never, ever, even privately think badly of anyone who decided not to donate.

OP posts:

Redshoeblueshoe · 10/02/2021 02:02

HahaVeryBunny that's made me cry. What a fabulous mum in the most difficult time of her life x

Weirdnessabounds · 10/02/2021 02:36

For you and your family
For everyone waiting on transplant lists
But most of all for families demonstrating the ultimate act of love for a stranger, in donating part of their precious loved one. I hope it brings you the tiniest bit of comfort in the most terrible of times 💐

Crayfishforyou · 10/02/2021 07:19

This is wonderful, and why my organ donation wishes are basically ‘help yourself, I don’t need it any more’

My friend’s cousin died in a car crash, her organs went to help 5 people to live. I know it provided great comfort to her family.

BettyCarver · 10/02/2021 08:01

It’s the ultimate gift: a chance to live.

It may be a stranger that receives the gift, but that stranger is someone’s son or daughter, and perhaps someone’s husband/ wife/mum/dad
I always remind myself that if one of my children, was in need, they would be a stranger to whoever the donation came from, yet to me they’re the most precious beings in the world.

Thank you to all donors and their families

AlternativePerspective · 10/02/2021 08:07

I am going to need a heart transplant at some point. Next week I have an appointment to find out just how close I am to having to go on that list.

the one thing I have struggled with immensely since being told is the fact that once I am waiting for that call, I will be waiting for the right person to die so that I can live. It must never be forgotten that often life is made possible because of death.

OP I hope your family member does well...

renallychallenged · 10/02/2021 08:12

My DH is waiting for a transplant. It's a very odd position to be in. You're basically waiting for someone else's family to be destroyed in order to put yours back together. Very conflicting.

TheChosenTwo · 10/02/2021 08:26

I have a relative desperately waiting for an organ. It’s a terrible situation waiting for the call to be told someone has lost their life and as a result, your loved one can have their second chance. It’s not something I think any recipient will ever take for granted, and the families of those who have died are so incredibly selfless to see through their own grief at the hardest of times and accept the decision to pass on the gift of life to others.
When I’m gone I hope they can take anything and pass it on, I won’t need it anymore.
Best wishes for your loved one @Mangotastic - it’s truly the best gift anyone could receive

Mydogisagentleman · 10/02/2021 09:50

Congratulations is not the right word, but I hope it conveys my thoughts.
I know two people in the same family who are living a life free of dialysis thanks to the generosity and kindness of bereaved families.
Both my husband and I will be reduced to eyebrow after our deaths.
It is not solely solid organs that can be harvested.

DaisyDreaming · 10/02/2021 10:26

Today someone i know is also celebrating 9 year since their child’s life was saved today.

I hope the person your referring to has a smooth recovery from surgery and can be back home soon

Meinelieblingskatze · 10/02/2021 11:53

I have looked after several patients who donated organs. 2 of them became ill suddenly and were obviously not going to recover. It's a long and gruelling process for the relatives because the process is predictably drawn out; withdrawal of treatment and the process of dying on critical care can be quick once the decision has been made, but with organ donation the specialist team have to complete lots of paperwork, blood tests, phone calls etc to ensure the patient is suitable and their organs go to the right person. This can take an extra 24 hours. It can come as a shock to relatives how full on the process is. They have to process a lot of very different feelings in a short time, from hoping that their loved one will pull through to having to accept that essentially their relative has died although they look very much alive. Occasionally it turns out that the patient might not be suitable. I have so much respect for families who go through all this, don't know how they keep it together.
We actually get personal updates from the donation team when we are involved. It details the kind of people who benefited so it will say 'a 20 year old man on dialysis' etc which really lifts the mood and reinforces how important donation is.

Flip