Dinner times as a family?

[NordicWife]

We are weaning our baby and I keep reading about how helpful it is to eat with them at the same time. I would also like to start doing one meal for the family (baby's without salt) as it will be so much easier. But does this mean families / couples eat really early in the afternoon?

We normally cook and eat around 8-8.30 after baby's in bed. Baby's bedtime routine begins at 6.15 and baby normally gets their dinner at about 5pm. Obviously 5pm is way to earlier for us to eat dinner! Plus my husbands still at work anyway! So I don't understand how we can possibly eat at the table with baby, apart from at lunch time perhaps?

How do other families do this? What time do you eat?

I always sat with dd while she ate - at lunchtime, I ate too, but not for 5pm dinner. When she got older, we ate as a family where possible, I would eat early with dd or she would eat and I would be with her. She never sat on her own, but often ate alone.

Interesting. Yes I always sit with baby but not always eating food as it's only 5pm. I also don't eat breakfast but sit and have coffee while baby eats porridge. I am envious of continental Europe families who eat late and baby goes to bed late so eats with them. But it doesn't work alongside UK baby bed times!

When they were little I sat with them while they ate tea and read books to them. So many books!

We always eat together as a family now, trying to remember how old the youngest was when we made the shift to eating together. It was a gradual thing depending on what else was going on, but I'd say we were almost always eating together by the time the youngest was around five. We've gradually shifted the time back and eat around 7.30pm now the youngest is eight.

I have breakfast and lunch with baby DD then one of us sits with her for dinner at 5/5.30, she has a bath / story etc and goes to bed at 7, so we have dinner just the 2 adults at 7.30/8

We all have dinner together at 6pm (3 children aged 5, 3 and 1). Then half an hour for kids to play/tidy up, up to bed at 7ish. Works for us. I guess the kids are probably asleep quite late by lots of other family’s standards (8 if we’re lucky) but they seem to be getting enough sleep and don’t get up ridiculously early, which is a plus.

My DC are 3.5 and 1.5. Although we always go through the ritual of eating dinner together (which I love and believe is important), depending on when DH is able to bring them home from nursery (between 5:15 and 6:15) and their general moods, we sometimes only have a “symbolic” serving of food with them before shuffling them off to bed.

I’d estimate we eat a proper, full dinner together about 4 times a week. Twice a week, we tend to be pretty rushed. Friday nights, we pretend to eat with the kids but then actually order take-away when they’re in bed and call it our COVID date night. ;-)

I just used to feed our dc their tea at around 4p.m. and then their supper at around 6. I sat at the table with them with a brew whilst they were eating and dh and I got ours at around 8 ish.

It's quite often still the same now that they're older. We eat together on weekends usually.

We eat as a family 5.30-6 when it is possible. I.e everyone is home by then. Obviously not if someone is at work. Always at weekends.

Pre kids we used to eat late but honestly if it is possible to eat as a family then I think it is such a fab thing to do for getting them used to eating the same as you, setting a good example. When they’re older some lovely conversations take place over dinner.

I am not the norm in my circles though. The majority feed their kids something different to them 5ish and then have their “grown up” dinner later. Every day, even if they could eat together. I think that’s quite sad tbh.

@NordicWife

Interesting. Yes I always sit with baby but not always eating food as it's only 5pm. I also don't eat breakfast but sit and have coffee while baby eats porridge. I am envious of continental Europe families who eat late and baby goes to bed late so eats with them. But it doesn't work alongside UK baby bed times!

Why not just go with the continental timings then if they'll work better for you? It's not like your baby will be discussing UK baby bedtimes with her baby peers so just do what suits you.

You know you get to decide when baby goes to bed?

I don't think we ate with DD at weaning age but we pretty much always eat with DD now she's two, unless we're getting a takeaway or something and then we'll have it later. We eat at 6 and DD goes to bed between 7.30-8, in the bath from 7ish. It seems quite a British thing to put children to bed super early and then be surprised when they wake up at 5am!

When DS was little he ate at 5 and like you DH and I ate at 8.30ish. However when DS2 came along, and I was on maternity leave, and DH was working from home anyway, we all ate together maybe four or five days a week, at 5ish. That continued until now when they are 10 and 13, with the main meal getting gradually later so now we might eat between 5.30 and 6.30. I was brought up in a family where eating the main meal after 7 was unheard of and we usually used to eat at about 5 anyway, so it was only when I went to work that I started eating late - it wasn’t much of a jolt to go back to that.

If your husband isnt home you either need to eat with the baby or husband. We do all eat at half five/six together but we are all home from work.

Do continental families have later dinner as they have a siesta in the afternoon?

We always ate together and still do. It’s earlier than I’d like (usually about 6) but worth it for us.

@NordicWife

Interesting. Yes I always sit with baby but not always eating food as it's only 5pm. I also don't eat breakfast but sit and have coffee while baby eats porridge. I am envious of continental Europe families who eat late and baby goes to bed late so eats with them. But it doesn't work alongside UK baby bed times!

@NordicWife

If you're envious of continental Europe bedtimes why not adopt them? You're obliged to follow UK norms!

We ate dinner with DC at 6pm. We sometimes already had dinner at that time anyway, sometimes later, so she just fitted in with us really (and with my preconceived ideas from my own childhood as to what time family dinnertime is).

We ate at 6pm with our 1st child from around the age of 1, bed 7.30 ish.

Second child fell into our routine at that time of 6.30 dinner and bed 7.45-8ish.

Whatever works for you!

DD always had a substantial snack after nursery and infant school and ate a small version of what we were eating at 6ish. I didn't want dp eating alone every night and I was too lazy to cook twice lol! Now she's at junior school, she still has a sensible snack and we eat together most nights at about 6.30. Also meant she was more accepting of a wider range of food although she has always struggled with veg!

Always did Sunday lunch / dinner together and as kids got to about 5, Saturday evening meal together.

It's only since Covid that we've eaten together during the week because of work.

We never really ate tea together when our dc were very little. Dp didn't get home u til 6.45 ish and I preffered to eat with him after they'd gone to bed. Now they're 5 and 7 they can hang on until 6-6.30 and Dp is home due to covid so we eat together 6 nights a week. I don't think it's that important with very small dc tbh.

At that age, mine often ate a little bit earlier to facilitate bedtime (though 2nd one mostly ate when we did and just had to cope with staying up late). When we did do an earlier dinner, I'd make one meal, then save some leftovers for dc to eat the next day. But mostly with my 2nd, we ate together, usually 6:30-7:30, and then bedtime was 8-8:30 ish. I just adjusted naptimes to make that work. Sometimes ours do eat separate to us (they're 7 & 2 now) like on the weekend when we might have a more adult date night sort of meal later, but we still sit down with them while they eat. During the week, we all eat together but at a normal dinner time (usually around 7 ish).

We started eating tea as a family when the our first DC turned one. We’d eat at 5.30. It did/does seem very early but we just got used to it. We’d eat later for 2 nights a week, mainly so we could cook something different/what we wanted to eat. Otherwise it would be the same meal for everyone. The time has gradually crept later as the DC have got older and we now eat around 6.30 (DC aged 7, 9 and 11). We still tend to eat separately 2 x a week but I can see that may change again as their taste buds mature. Sitting and eating round a table together feels important to us as a family and, as they get older, it can be a time to have some interesting/enjoyable conversations.

We eat between 6-6.30 then go up for bath and bed time around 7.15 and asleep for 8ish. The kids have a ‘tea’ at nursery at 4 (sandwiches/fruit/cheese and crackers type stuff) and then we eat together.