Do You Do Much As A Family?

[EternalOptimist7]

COVID times aside, I wondered if many families are like you see in tv adverts. Cooking & eating together, playing board games, watching movies, going on day trips etc etc. The 3 of us don’t spend much time together & it makes me sad. DD12 just stays in her room & even before Covid, she wasn’t keen to be with us. I have loads of lovely childhood memories & would love the same for DD. Even when she was little it was sometimes hard to persuade her to do stuff. Now it’s kind of like having a lodger 😢

Dds 13 and 9. Yes we do lots together -we always have.

Do you eat together? I think sitting down to eat together every day is a great basis for nice family relationships.

It can be hard to get them off screens sometimes but I do limit screen time too.

How little were you having to persuade her? Mine are 9 and 6 and we just tell them where we are going.

OP - rather than comparing your situation to others, decide what you want for your family and make it happen.

Yes we did more together before covid I think. More day trips & outdoor activities. Now I can hardly get them to come for a walk. I’m sure it will get better as the weather does.

Not so much during the week but we always go for a walk over the weekend and have movie nights together. Used to go to the zoo and swimming sessions before the pandemic.

Yes kids similar age. Screens are downstairs in our house and go off 20 mins before tea so they get involved in setting the table and small meal related tasks. The evening meal is not rushed and everyone encouraged to talk about their day and
plans for next - this is where you can plan for for example bake cakes the next day or watch a film together or go a bike ride etc. Some nights we propose a game of frustration or cards and this happens straight after tea before anyone has sloped off to their own stuff. Also have had to make a conscious effort to understand and talk about pokemon and minecraft (DH actually plays too) and I try to watch the odd programmes featuring Ariana grande and similar 😬

Quite a lot together. And, when permitted, 13yo niece too (ours are 9&7).

DH encouraging the girls in his hobbies is what swung it. I'm just the support driver!

At that age they will just stay in their room unless you all make a big effort to get out of that habit.

Good tips above.

After covid- what hobbies does she have? What could you do together? Swimming/ice skating/rollerblading/ cycling/trampolining/ climbing/ hiking?

Does she like zoos? Funfairs? Museums?

You will probably have to ‘sell’ family time to her otherwise she will likely choose online time with friends!

We used to watch DS play football on a Saturday as he was in a team. We used to then have lunch out afterwards mainly at a Thai restaurant we loved. He was in that team from age 7 to 16. We also had Saturday night cinema night. It rotated on who could pick the film and then a score went up on a chart. DH alway had the lowest marks as he picked rubbish.

DS and I have very often gamed on our consoles together. As a family we do play board games sometimes. Just short games like frustration but very occasionally Risk will come out and then it’s a five hour game.

We currently have dinner with Granny online on a Sunday. We then all play articulate together as we both have the game. We are also gaming together again.

Not much. We eat together every day, sometimes breakfast, lunch and dinner. Very occasionally play chess or ludo. Go for a walk together. My 2 are x box mad.

Only a 6 year old here but since COVID we all sit down for breakfast, lunch and dinner

We now have time for board games after dinner, which happens every night now (i am bored shitless of cludo and scrabble)

Saturday night is movie night

We got pokemon hunting together on saturday and sunday
We all do our chores together on Saturday.

Plus lots of shouting; crying; doors slamming as well. Definitely not a perfect family by any means but this is what works for us