I'm missing my baby grow up

[Mylittlesandwich]

DS is 14 months. DH lost his job after the summer and has been struggling to find work ever since. I work full time and now also deliver takeaways at evenings and weekends to make ends meet. I'm managing ok with the extra work and I don't yet feel it's too much but tonight it just hit me how much I'm missing out on.

DS still has a bottle of warm milk at bedtime and tonight he took the bottle himself, took the lid off and drank it by himself. I had a little cry. I love seeing him growing and learning but I'm missing it all! I'm out for hours in the evening and weekends and I'm shut away in the spare room most of the day during the week. It's nobody's fault (unless covid can take the blame) but it's just hit me that it's making me sad.

Sorry just needed to talk to people who might understand.

Can your husband not take over the evening/weekend delivery? That way the workload is split (somewhat) and you get to spend time in with your son...

Can't your dh be the one to get the evening job? I hope he is trying hard.

It is honestly hard, but you are being a good parent by providing for your family.

What are you doing two jobs and your DH none?

Sounds very tough OP - agree why can’t dh work evenings?

Sorry forgot to mention in my OP DH can't drive. He really is applying for every single thing he can. I can't fault him at all.

Oh OP that is difficult.
You are doing the right thing in providing for your family and hopefully it will not be that much longer if your husband finds something.
Cuddle him whenever you can, you have many many years ahead and he won't even remember this stage though I know it is breaking your heart.

Sympathies. It is tough. I feel many main breadwinners will have had this experience.

Hopefully your DH will find work soon and you can drop the delivery work. Your DS is little, and you feel like you’re missing out on things. In reality, while things like these small steps to independence feel big, over a childhood this happens many, many times. There’s a lot more to come that you won’t miss out on. In my experience, the stuff that follows is way more enjoyable!

In the meantime, you are doing so much for your child by keeping a roof over his head and food on the table. Take pride in that.

Good luck to your DH, hope he finds something soon.

I really feel for you. I hope your husband finds something soon. Is there any time during the day you can block an hour or two just to have time with your boy? Is there any flexibility with your day job? I know you have probably thought of this type of thing.... it won't last forever, and it's not much consolation now but you should be proud of yourself.

This is a really tough situation for you. Your DH and DS are so lucky to have such a hard-working and resilient wife and mummy I hope your DH finds something soon so you can drop the delivery work.

@Thierryhenryneedisaymore

I really feel for you. I hope your husband finds something soon. Is there any time during the day you can block an hour or two just to have time with your boy? Is there any flexibility with your day job? I know you have probably thought of this type of thing.... it won't last forever, and it's not much consolation now but you should be proud of yourself.

Thanks the main issue is that he has experience in hospitality and they aren't hiring.

I can sometimes manage a longer lunch but if I'm also working in the evening I don't have the time because I need to finish job 1 in time to start job 2. It's just a bit of a shock to the system because we initially split childcare and working so we both had time with DS but obviously things have changed now.