Partner's slang language

[oreo2020]

My partner was born in 1970s and grew up in London. I am an immigrant.
He's now in his 40s and fairly professional and still uses a lot of slang language that he grew up with intermittently with friends and colleagues, for example:

Jack diddly squat
Brown bread
Bird (talking of me)
Snuff it
You get me
Bump off

And similar...

He also says 'Valentimes' instead Valentine's although he spells it correctly!

I don't correct him as English is not my native language but I find it somewhat stuck in 1980s and do think a grown up man would have grown his vocabulary as he was building up his life and career.
But maybe it's more common than I think?

I've been in London for 20 years and I say things like this, so does my husband. Why is it an issue for you?

Why is this a problem? Native English is full of slang terms and regional phrases.

This is totally normal. my husband also does the Valentimes thing which makes me want to kill him though

@MustardMitt mine pronounces "towel" and "tail" exactly the same way and it gives me the rage 🤣

Not a problem per say, but when it goes along with Valentimes and pacific (instead of specific) you do wonder about the vocabulary. Plus none of my colleagues in my professional field use that slang. But maybe they are not strictly Londoners.

There are colloquial terms all over the country. It's really not unusual.

@oreo2020

If you're "wondering about the vocabulary" you might want to check "per say".

Imo there's a big difference between slang / colloquialisms and mispronunciation.

Unless it's affecting his career, the first is fine. It's part of him and his life.

However the Pacific thing I'd have to pa correct

Can you tell me pacifically what to get you for Valentine's Day?
Pardon?
Can you tell me pacifically what you want?
What's it got to do with the ocean?
Eh?
You said pacifically. Do you want me to pick something ocean themed?
No, pacifically. Tell me exactly.
Specifically.
Eh
It's spec not pac.
You know what I mean.
Well no, two totally and unconnected words.

@VeniVidiWeeWee I stand corrected!!

Leave him.

[quote JorisBonson]@MustardMitt mine pronounces "towel" and "tail" exactly the same way and it gives me the rage 🤣[/quote]
My mum says I do this but I don't believe her .

I can say towel "properly" but it I really have to think about it.

Well I’d hate to be somebody’s ‘Bird’ but I suppose the rest is just colloquial

Per say

@JorisBonson

There are colloquial terms all over the country. It's really not unusual.

All over the world actually

I think the OP needs to broaden her mind, if not her horizons.

I was in the ginnel yesterday and had forgotten to put the door on the sneck. I only noticed when I put wood in t'hole. No use skriking as I was going out for barmcakes anyway.

Our kid lent me a nicker, which was sound. I got scraps from the chippy but they were 'anging. That chippy has gone proper bobbins.

Judging people for using colloquialisms is nothing but snobbery.

You don't have to 'grow out' of them... regional language is just as valid as the arbitrarily chosen 'Queen's English'.

Unfortunately many people do have to change their speech in order to appear professional at work. Hopefully one day this will change.

Do you never use slang in your first language OP? I think the thing is, when you have learned a language, you are more heightened to 'correctness' and have a strong reaction to 'mistakes or errors' because they are something you have overcome. I had to speak fluent Italian in my previous job, and I notice people's 'mistakes' but never mention them. I think it is not very kind to assume that others will judge your husband, because you do. How would you feel if the situation were reversed?

@iklboo

I was in the ginnel yesterday and had forgotten to put the door on the sneck. I only noticed when I put wood in t'hole. No use skriking as I was going out for barmcakes anyway.

Our kid lent me a nicker, which was sound. I got scraps from the chippy but they were 'anging. That chippy has gone proper bobbins.

That's made me smile! My nana used to tell me I "couldn't stop a pig in a ginnel" 🤣

Well my partner is not the only Londoner I know but he is the only I hear him using those, but maybe that's because I talk to him the most.

What is your first language OP?

Does no-one in your country ever use colloquial terms?

@oreo2020

Well my partner is not the only Londoner I know but he is the only I hear him using those, but maybe that's because I talk to him the most.

If the other Londoners are colleagues then I'd assume they use the usual professional language used in your work sector when talking to you. Most people adopt different language systems depending on situation (interview, meeting, colleagues, police officer, friends, partner).

Or if they're friends maybe they moderate their use of slang because they know English isn't your first language and they don't know if you understand colloquialisms.

A few years ago a psychiatric consultant I worked with who had learned English as an additional language was convinced a patient we had needed a referral to learning disability services; he based that almost entirely on her saying "hospickle" instead of hospital and would not accept that an awful lot of people mispronounce it that way in our locality and it was not a sign of diminished intellectual capability.

The British elite use slang all the time and no one thinks it is a sign that they lack professionalism or have failed to expand their vocabularies as they have grown.

Most of my youth was spent in Fenland where people look at you gone out and hang a left and go round yorn and are frit; we're bringing our dc up in Manchester and it's so, so interesting to compare the dialect they use to the one I was using at their ages.

Colloquialisms are good, terrible grammar and using totally the wrong word not so much, especially if it’s written down
So calling ones partner their “bird” isn’t exactly feminism 101 but it’s ok, saying Valentimes or pacifically is just incorrect and some people could assume means poorly educated (often wrongly)
Just remember OP that as a non English person you probably learnt proper text book English rather than how people really speak.

@iklboo

I was in the ginnel yesterday and had forgotten to put the door on the sneck. I only noticed when I put wood in t'hole. No use skriking as I was going out for barmcakes anyway.

Our kid lent me a nicker, which was sound. I got scraps from the chippy but they were 'anging. That chippy has gone proper bobbins.

Love this! I grew up hearing all those phrases. Lots of slang terms make language so much more interesting.

Maybe its because hes a Londoner...