Is it worth getting a wedding planner for a small wedding?

[Fressia123]

I'm clueless about organising weddings, our has the added complication that people will come from abroad, other side of the country, but we only want 50-75 guests, so it seems a bit silly? There's also the fact that my DP doesn't want a photographer and I do...

I've never known anyone use one. Just do lots of research, read people's experiences and have realistic expections.

The majority of people don't use a wedding planner. You can organise it all yourself. People travelling makes no difference, they sort themselves out. You can always add in details sheets with your invites with useful information for guests. Taxi numbers, train times, hotels and costs etc.

Also for the record I don't think you have to lay on coach transfers and a hotel booking system for travelling guests. They are adults who can do their own research and make a decision as to whether its feasible for them to attend a wedding. Do give plenty of notice and relevant information such as the location and whether their kids are invited so they can make an informed decision.

My family likes me to plan their holidays so I'm sure they'll want everything planned for them...

As far as I understand they're like a middle man / account / project manager?

I only know one person who used a planner, and that was a multi stage 3 day wedding with 500 guests. It’s really not necessary for anything less than that.

If you can afford one, have one (I'm all for keeping people in business right now)

However the project isn't that complicated and most people do it themselves.

But whether you have a planner or not, you'll still have to sort out with future DH things like photographers. How well you learn to argue, negotiate and compromise over this big party can be a useful rehearsal for how you'll deal with differences in future.

@AuntieStella that's kind of my philosophy in life... If you spread the wealth do it.

Most of the things we don't entirely agree on are because he's already had a big wedding and I haven't.

If you can afford it, do it. Yes of course you CAN do it yourself, but I found organising our wedding an utter ballache, and that was with 100 guests. To be honest, number of people doesn't make a massive difference if it's not a giant number as you still have to arrange all the things - I'd have done the same amount of work for a 50 person wedding. I would have loved a wedding planner if we could have afforded one.

Also - you should definitely get a photographer. We nearly didn't but my PILs insisted (and paid for it), and we're so glad we did - although we had reportage style rather than formal wedding photography

Why doesn't your partner want a photographer? Does he think you'll get decent photos from your guests (lol)? Or does he hate looking at photos of himself? (in which case tell him that no-one's going to be looking at him... ooh, just realised I've made an assumption here )

I shouldn't imagine a wedding planner would be sorting out flights, so you/family will have to arrange all that anyway.

Do you know where you'd like to hold it? If it's a popular Wedding Venue then they'll have someone who organises them and you talk to them (including - if a hotel - things like semi-reserving so many rooms for people to then book themselves, a thing we've experienced as guests several times).

I'm intrigued at the idea that 50-70 is a small wedding, btw...

I'm certainly no expert and I'm sure others on here will be but don't the venues have a kind of wedding planner who helps you organise the day . So when you've got your venue they will help you ?

50-75 isn't a small wedding, I would call it medium size.

A wedding planner isn't going to resolve the issue that you and your fiancé can't agree on certain things. Personally I think a photographer is an absolute must, I value good quality photography and treasure my wedding photos. The day goes by in a flash and it's lovely to have the photos to help remember it all, plus a dear relative died within 6 months of my wedding so I'm very glad we had some photos with him.

If it's a budget thing I would prioritise a photographer over a wedding planner, definitely. But then I like organising things myself!

Do you have a close friend or relative who is organised and would be happy to help if you delegated some things?

No, we don't have anybody who's is a close friend or relative local to us.

In his experience all photographers stage photos and make it uncomfortable. His words not mine...

I always thought a 50 guest wedding was small? Aren't normal weddings 100+? I haven't been to many, my cousin's had like 200+ guests and I thought that was "big".

All photographers?
You have to choose carefully, we did and our photographer didn't do awkward staged photos, you do obviously have to pose for couple shots but ours were pretty relaxed and nothing cringey.

Here's how we did our stress-free wedding, 50 people, more than half from overseas.
Exclusive use of a small hotel - they handled food, drink, marquee, flowers, recommended an excellent photographer and found me someone for my hair and make up. We had to provide them with a rooming list, timings for the day and a seating plan for the meal.
DJ/sound/lighting was provided by a friend in the business as a wedding gift
All we had to do was invite people, keep track of replies and buy our outfits.
No bridesmaids, no favours, no colour schemes, no photo booths, no cars, no-one hitting the road after drinking. Just good company and plenty to eat and drink.
Oh, and do get a photographer. Ours was a dream and it was him who pointed out that we needed to take the bouquet out of the water as otherwise it would run down my dress

I've contacted one but I think she might laugh at my budget of £15k . Ideally I want to spend even less but I've always dreamt of my wedding day :)