Feel out of sorts. How can I get through this?

[Fjmb]

I know that lots of people are feeling like this at the moment, has anyone managed to drag themselves out of it?

I have a history of GAD, am sitting here now wide awake, stomach turning at the thought of having to go to work tomorrow and my alarm will go off in 5 hours time. I coped fairly ok in the first lockdown and subsequent tiers but this feeling has been creeping up in me over the past few weeks and since the announcement of this lockdown it’s just become worse.

I’m so happy and relieved when it gets to Friday and I come home from work and can stay at home for two days, it’s the only time I actually feel slightly relaxed. I don’t want to go to work but I can’t afford to resign really. Actually I probably could but there’s something that’s making me go every day.

I know that I’m rambling but I know that I’m heading for panic attacks (I’ve suffered really badly in the past) Everything just seems so dark and pointless. I’m having really bad sleep from Sunday to Friday and barely functioning throughout the day. It’s making me snappy and tearful and I just don’t know how I can manage these feelings.

((Hug)).

I know how you feel. I work with teenagers, in a school, but not for the school. I can't work from home. So when the schools were 'closed' I breathed a sigh of relief knowing I can stay home until at least after the half term.

Unfortunately I definitely can't afford to retire, but I do run the real risk not having any work to return to, I 'think' I'll be ok if they go back after Easter, but much longer & I'll be contractless. EEK.

What else is making you feel you can't leave?

I don’t know, I think it’s partly because people are relying on me (I also work in a school) and partly because I’ll feel like I’ve failed in some way - which doesn’t actually make any sense to me even as I type it because what would I have failed at?

I just want to hibernate at home. I don’t know why I think that’ll be the better option, I just feel so down and tired, like I’m on constant high alert all week.

I had 3 hours of broken sleep, today is going to be a real struggle. Really don’t think I can keep this up for much longer