What is it like with kids who have an age gap of 5-6 years between them?

[SebastianTheCrab]

I have one DC and am massively on the fence about another but if we do go ahead the age gap will likely be about 5-6 years. The one thing that makes me sad is the thought they probably won't play together.

If you have DC with that age gap what's life like? (Especially Pre pandemic). Did it present problems with play dates/places you can go etc? How do they interact? Do their sexes make a difference (e.g. same sex siblings vs mixed sex)? Do you wish you'd had DC2 earlier? (Not much of an option for us at this point anyway though).

There is a five and a half year gap between my brother and me and we got on (and still get on) better than my own DC who have a 3 year gap. My brother is my best friend and we speak at least once a week.

I was 5 when my brother was born. I wasn't really interested in him as I wanted a sister. We certainly never played together. We get on now though live in different cities. The other day I came across some letters he wrote to me when I was at University.

Similar age difference between my two - it’s only now 16 and 10 lockdown is causing a few arguments- mainly youngest going into eldest room! But it’s easier as they have different interest and need to be in different places at different times. I also have a younger sister who is 8 years younger than me and while we weren’t that close growing up (I moved out when I was 17) we are now very close and couldn’t imagine not having her in my life.

My youngest two are five and a half years apart. At 9 and 3, they are endlessly fond of and devoted to one another. Closer than I ever thought possible.

5 years between my two. Brilliant age gap imo

Oldest was able to understand about the new baby, knew it might sometimes be annoying with crying etc... But also oldest was going to school and had other interests and other forms of attention.

Oldest could 'watch' baby for 30 seconds while I went to the toilet.

There was no direct competition (in comparison to me and my sister who were 2 years apart and competed on everything!). e.g. if the younger was better at school work, as teenagers they sat slightly different exam systems.

WE didn't have 2 hormonal teenagers in the house at one time. dc1 was through it, we had a year of calm, then dc2 started....

In teenage times, youngest dc had someone (not Mum and Dad) who they could speak to about any difficult things...

Now as 2 adults they are very close.

6.5 yrs between ours ,B and G in that order . The eldest never wanted a sibling and frankly until he was 17/18 they never got on at all , now they are both in their 20s they get along very well . It would have made little difference if our age gap had been less as ds was always very happy as an only child . I’m just grateful that they’ve turned a corner and get along well now .

5 years between mine and they absolutely adore each other and play lots

I have a 6yo son and 16 month old daughter. Ds adores his little sister but does need his own space so she doesn't destroy all his stuff. I've found it nice to have 1:1 with dd during school hours and with ds during naptimes (weekends and holidays). My dd is a much better sleeper than ds was as a baby so the newborn stage was very different. Going out is much easier with the bigger age gap as don't need to chase after ds and he can help. I think all age gaps have pros and cons but don't let an age gap stop you having another child if you want one

I have DDs age 9 and 4, and DS is 8 months.

DDs do play together. During lockdown there's been a lot of imaginative play and putting on little shows for us. They do also need their own space though, especially when DD1 wants to do art without DD2 interrupting.

When DD2 was a toddler days out could be tricky, but now they both enjoy the park, zoo, legoland, etc.

Pre-pandemic DD2 did have to get used to waiting around a bit at DD1's swimming lessons and things, but I think this is common with close in age siblings too.

I don't wish I had DD2 earlier, but I am glad we didn't wait too much longer. There's 14 years between me and my sister and we're not close at all.

6 years between me and my sister and we're very close, I can't imagine life without her. It's absolutely a case of personalities rather than number of years ago gap in my opinion.

I've 3.5yrs between my eldest two boys. They'll be 13 and 9 when their baby sister arrives next month. Having them close together was good because they liked similar toys/activities, less time to store clothes that were kept for the younger son.
My eldest was just starting reception after his brother was born so I did get some one to one time with him. It did mean the relentless, sleepless nights seem to go on forever. Eldest wasn't really sleeping through til probably 2.5yrs and then his brother followed not long behind.
They have a love hate relationship which is finally getting a bit better after 4/5 years of fighting and bickering.
The benefit of the much bigger gap this time is their understanding. My 13year old rolls his eyes but I know he'll want to help once his sister arrives, that's just how he is. My youngest is excited as he'll get to be a big brother now.
Though I do wonder what it will be like when they're older/teenagers and their sister is still at primary school.
I think there are pros and cons for all age gaps/gender mixes. It can also depend on parenting. There are 2.5yrs between me and my brother and we hated each other. Didn't get on at all until after I moved out. Even now we aren't that close. But our mother quite blatantly favoured him and our father me so that didn't help.
I guess there'll be positives and potential negatives whatever you decide x

Two girls 6 years apart. It was ok in baby and age 6 time, then it was difficult until older DD got to 16. Older DD was a difficult teen! Now they are as thick as thieves and it's like younger DD now 15 has two mums! It's great actually.

5 years between my 2 boys. They do play together if you can drag the eldest off his xbox. They are 7 and 12. They do fight like cat and dog though. I'm pregnant with my third now and there will be obviously 7 and 12 years between her and them, so I dount thwy will be close which is sad.
There's 6 years between me and my brother. We are bot close, but I think that's more because we are very different people and he irritates me because he acts a lot younger than he is.

Ds22 and Dd17 always been best of friends. No jealousy when Dd born as Ds was happy with his own friends and hobbies and just delighted to have a sibling. Dd has always looked up to him and as such they share loads of interests - tv shows, gaming etc. Perfect gap in my opinion.