Tell me about your first love?

[strawberrycherryblossom]

For some unknown reason I messaged my 'first love' this morning. We probably haven't spoken in 4 years but have spent the day catching up. He was/is a wonderful person and whilst it was me who ended things I now see I shouldn't have/did it for the wrong reasons. We were both very young and I feel quite nostalgic about him, 12 years on.

I have been in a very happy relationship for 6 years, we have one DC and another on the way. I don't want to be back with my ex but occasionally find myself wondering what life could have been like.

So for some lighthearted evening chat, tell me about your first love. Are you still with them? What were they like?

I was 20, I went to Israel as a kibbutz volunteer, for an indefinite period. The day after I arrived, I started working in the kitchen with a 26 yo woman who had immigrated to Israel from a Jewish children's home in the UK, ten years earlier. She was married with two children, we fell in love. The agony and the ecstasy! Of course it didn't work out! Took me years to get over her.

I should add, it didn't break up her marriage, her DH was/is a lovely bloke and we all ended up friends.

Started seeing each other at school, when I was 16 and he was 17. He was bloody lovely and a perfect first boyfriend - kind, considerate, generous, gentle. We had a lovely relationship that lasted a couple of years before I ended things. There was absolutely nothing wrong with him but I just had a growing feeling he wasn’t the person I should spend my life with. He was very upset and didn’t want to break up which was hard.

We stayed in touch as friends for a couple of years but gradually that tapered off. I haven’t heard from him in ages but I hope he’s happy and living a great life.

Reader, I married him.

We met on the first day of sixth form and it was love at first sight. He had just moved to the area. We stayed together for five years but in retrospect it wasn’t a healthy relationship. We’re now both happily married to other people and both have kids - we are on each other’s Facebook but that’s it. His wife is really cool 😀

Mine was an ex Army lad, we met early 20's. He thought I was too good for him as I went to Uni, I never thought that though.

We met in September and he took me to Paris for the New Year. He was an absolute gentleman.

We were together 7 years, we bought a house together, we didn't live with each other before that though I did spend a lot if time at his place.
Within 3 months of moving in, we realised we couldn't live together, we brought out the worst in each other, still lived each other though.
He moved out and I moved away.
He married the girl he met after me and is married with 2 kids.
I sincerely hope he is happy, he was a lovely bloke.

Loved each other, not lived.

Mine was absolutely gorgeous. I was 15, he was 16. It felt like the worlds worst nausea and ecstasy all at once. Never felt such a rush of hormones and excitement.
It didn't last long. A few intense weeks. Then he broke it off, blamed distance / his mum.

It's been 15 years but I still think of him quite a lot (person I imagine him to be). He's a regular feature in my dreams when I'm unwell for some reason.
We never met again. He lives abroad now.

I'd love to see him again. Though he's probably forgotten it ever happened.

I was daft for him. He was older, drank too much, but was funny and good looking. I ended up pregnant and along at a young age. He kept drinking, taking drugs and took nothing to do with his child. He died a few days ago.

Pregnant and alone

I met mine when I was 17. I'd just joined 6th form in a big comprehensive school and made lots of new friends. One day, some of the friends turned up at my door with a lad who they were friends with, and who'd left the school at the end of the previous term to join the navy.

I was absolutely besotted by him and we saw each other for 14 months. Of course, a lot of that time, he was away, and also of course, he had a girl (or several in every port!)

He finished with me in the February before my a levels. I was heartbroken and basically didn't go to school again and completely fucked up my exams. I was 18 and I think I was at least 25 before I was properly over him! I still, after all these years, think of him on his birthday.

And I just found out last week that he died a couple of years ago of a sudden brain haemorrhage. It made me feel so sad to hear that

I don't know if it counts as first love, but I had a very intense friendship from ages 15-18. We talked almost every day and wrote each other letters that tried very hard to sound romantic. We ended up having a massive row when we got to university - I think because neither of us quite knew what to do!

We met up again a few years back, and it was lovely. He came out, rather shyly, and I got to tell him I was with my (female) DP and had a baby. And we got to laugh about it - because it turns out what drew us together was feeling like the odd ones out!

After that my first serious boyfriend, sadly, turned out to be a massive hypocrite. He and his wife make a big deal of being very liberal and 'woke,' but after I came out and met my female DP, they were no longer comfortable socialising with us.

He was gay and I had no idea! We were boyfriend and girlfriend for a few months when we were 14. I used to write poetry and songs about him.

I loved him

Or thought I did

He tried to rape me.

He eventually raped me.

I did not know I was worth mor

Worth more,

I wish someone had told me.

Reader, I married him eventually. There were 30 years and 2 children in between. Reconnected with friends re united , left husband and re married straight away. Still together 18 years later. Children want nothing to do with us , but I don't care cos he is my sole mate. My evil dad broke us up at 16.

We got together at sixth form after two years of flirting at school and were together for about 8 months.

It was everything a first relationship should be really, but obviously we were very young and he ended it as we were both planning to go to uni etc etc.

We stayed in touch until our early twenties by which time we were both with our future spouses. Although we didn't stay in touch my parents and his had become good friends by then so we knew how one another was doing. His parents came to my wedding.

I always hoped we'd get back in touch as friends at some point, but he tragically died 5 years ago at the age of 39 of an undiagnosed heart condition.

I kind of think of him as my guardian angel, as wanky as that sounds.

Met mine at an under 18s disco at the hospital.
I was wearing a red outfit and he'd asked the dj to play lady in red. Then asked me to dance. He wore a pastel pink Fred Perry knitted jumper (80s fashion) which smelled faintly of b. O
We were mates for a few months, then he disappeared. I was sad but oh well. My bf rang him from the callbox and asked him out for me.
We started and omg what an amazing kisser he was. He was a smoker which repels me now, but not fussed then. He looked like Marc almond. He chatted shite non stop so I made sure to kiss him ALOT to use his skills.
He was generous, fun and wrote great love letters. I only orgasmed once with him but we enjoyed the practice. He cheated on me with an older l. P with 3 kids and I was devastated. Crying in the street devastated. I was 17.
A year later he begged me back but I'd moved on.
Seen him recently..... Still loud, still chats shite non stop. No regrets.

@MrsT1405

Reader, I married him eventually. There were 30 years and 2 children in between. Reconnected with friends re united , left husband and re married straight away. Still together 18 years later. Children want nothing to do with us , but I don't care cos he is my sole mate. My evil dad broke us up at 16.

Think I've read that before on here and it still shocks me.

14-24 and he was the kindest person I have ever met. We went in different directions and wanted different things... Makes me feel sick with sadness to think about him.

till together 18 years later. Children want nothing to do with us , but I don't care cos he is my sole mate

Wow. Couldn't imagine ever not caring about my kids. Or putting a man before my kids. You're priorities are messed up.

He was a gaslighting, mentally and emotionally abusive bastard. He doesn’t have a good life and maybe it’s karma.

We met just before my 16th birthday and were together just over a year - he was a nice boy. I stayed at his house for a couple of months in the middle because I didn't get on with my mum well (my mum was NOT impressed) and we thought we were very grown up, but we mostly just played XBox and went for long moody walks on the beach and did things we'd read in Cosmo (chocolate + sex = horrible idea haha). I remember our breakup most vividly haha - I can't really remember why we broke up now, I think it had just run its course, and I had this grand notion of breaking up on the beach. So it was raining and windy and we were shouting at each other and crying like two teenagers do when they break up, and I remember thinking "god this is like a film" 😂 I was an idiot. I've bumped into him very occasionally when I go home, he always says hi and asks after my mum and sister, bless him!

Most of these are so lovely to read. There's definitely something you never forget about that first romance. It's probably a bit immature and nothing like the relationship you have settled down with but at the time it is perfect. I wouldn't change my current DP but I do think fondly about the time we were together.

 to those who had a rough time. You're worth more than that.

@BettyAndVeronica I have to agree. I know that as a parent you are just as entitled to be happy in life but it absolutely could not be at the expense of my children. They will always be my number 1.

I was 18. In the end we weren't in the same place when it came to committing to a relationship and we split up after a year. We ended up getting back together but I had a baby by then and he definitely wasn't ready to change the pace of life. I still think about him and wonder what life would be like if we were still together.