DH is passive-aggressively loading the dishwasher (lighthearted!).

[GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal]

I tried a new recipe tonight, and it was a hit with everyone! This is rare - in a family of four we have two fussy eaters (DH and DS) and one person low-carbing (me), and DD, who delightfully eats whatever is put in front of her and says it was delicious.

So, yay! New meal to be added to the rotation. The problem is it used two baking trays, a saucepan and a griddle pan, and so DH is now huffing and puffing and clattering about and muttering about it's not all going to fit and he going to have to - horror of horrors - wash some up by hand.

Clearing up after dinner is his only contribution to anything food -related. All meals are planned, shopped for and cooked by me. I usually do the clearing up after breakfast and lunch atm, and empty the dishwasher in the morning.

I love him dearly, but if I hear one more huff I'm going to slam his face into the kitchen counter. And make him clear up the mess afterwards.

I would stop cooking for him and I mean that both light heartedly 😂 and in all seriousness. 🤔 How tedious to lovingly put special effort in to cook for someone so vocally ungrateful. How disappointing for you OP.

He's always very appreciative when he's eating it! It's afterwards the grumbling starts, if I've had the audacity to use more than one pot.

I think he thinks I do it on purpose.

I can’t possibly comment until I know what you cooked...

He does it on purpose. He's trying to bully you into doing all the cleaning up too.

As he's such a big baby, perhaps try making him an eggy tea until he's ready for big boy dinners again?

I think after nearly 20 years together, he knows that's not going to work!

I would just move myself out of earshot and leave him to get on with it. The huffing is for an audience.

Dinner was delicious. It was supposed to be cod wrapped in Palma ham, with a tomato and olive sauce. But haddock was on offer and cod wasn't, so I did it with haddock instead, and failed to mention that to DH and DS who "don't like it."

The sauce was made in the saucepan (obviously), whereas the fish in ham as started in the griddle pan, then transferred to the oven in a baking tray. I had a second baking tray for roasting some green beans and courgettes in, and I microwaved some rice for them as they can't contemplate a meal without carbs.

It's not like I was sous-viding or anything.

@Beamur

I would just move myself out of earshot and leave him to get on with it. The huffing is for an audience.

I think this is the answer. I like to sit at the table and digest with a glass of wine, while the kids watch a bit of tv in the living room before bed, but maybe I need to join them and put up with Pokemon instead of puffing.

Sous-viding actually creates very little washing up, really just a bag you chuck out.

I could easily use twice that amount in meal prep and my DH wouldn't complain. Just ignore him, move elsewhere and enjoy your wine. If he escalated then offer to let him plan and cook healthy tasty meals that everyone (not just him!) enjoys...

Don't tell DH! He'll have me sous-viding everything!

You need a griddle with a removable handle.

Buy it for his birthday to help him with the washing up

He's very hard to buy for, I may just do that!