Career Vs Baby (27F Chartered Accountant)

[Puzzles10848]

Hi all

I am struggling to make a decision on whether to have a baby or continue with my audit career to progress.

I am currently a Chartered Accountant at supervisor level (will be 2 years to progression at least). I want to ideally start a family before 30:

• My SO is 5 years older than me

• Age related complications are less

• I will have more energy

• We are already on the property ladder and finances are fine

What would you recommend?
A few things on my mind are:

• I was thinking of starting fresh in a firm after as a financial controller/work my way up

• worried that people my age/ at my workplace would frown on this and I'm worried I won't be taken seriously as most people wait until Manager/SM before starting a family

• I might be starting in a new audit department, shall I hold this off?

I know absolutely nothing about accounting, but I would bank a few more years in your career and doing lots of travelling (when life is more normal again) and then have a baby. It's a nightmare-ish time to be home with small children and not an ideal time to be pregnant right now either. So I'd use the time to pay off some of your mortgage, hit some career milestones, and have an amazing time travelling. You're still young. I didn't even meet dh yet at 27 and was off working abroad and travelling at that age. There is plenty of time for being settled but it's hard to be spontaneous and be fully devoted to aspects of your career once you have kids.

Trying for a baby is a lottery. You do t know until you try how easy it will be so all you can go on is whether you’re ready right now.

I had my first at 32 so I’d say you have plenty of time, but then I have 2 children and got pregnant exactly when I wanted to (literally 1st month of trying) but not everyone is as lucky as not every conception ends in a baby.

If you want to be pregnant at 30 then I’d say work your socks off now, go for the progressions and put the hours in to get to the level you want

I’m a solicitor so similar career path. Definitely get another couple of years’ experience under your belt before trying. Quite apart from how crap it is being pregnant and having a baby during this pandemic (speaking from experience) it is so SO much harder to put the hours in and build your reputation once the baby is here. If you wait until you’re that bit more senior then you will (a) have proven yourself and (b) will be in a better position to control your own time, which is really useful with kids in childcare. I was able to leave at 5 every day and be trusted to log in and finish my work later on which would never have been acceptable as a junior associate. If you’re thinking of moving firms then absolutely do this first too.

Oh and if you move then bear in mind that many places have minimum service requirements to qualify for enhanced maternity pay so you might need to factor that into your plans.

Here's my advice.
If you want to be the type of parent that is around for your kids at least some of the time you should try to get to a point in your career where you have sufficient seniority that you can be employed in a role which has flexibility. Do NOT seek in-line management roles that are people-facing and require you to be there in person. Go for roles that you can do as a consultant, in the office some of the time.
Then, seek a flexible employer.
And marry a man who has the wisdom to seek flexibility in his work-life too.
Then have the bab(ies).

The ability to control your own time (as Harriet said) is WAY more valuable to you than money. But often the two go hand in hand. The highest paid positions are often the most flexible. So, consider accountancy-related consultancies that are very high-skilled like forensic accounting or corporate valuations. Invest in your networks now: meet up with people who work in those kinds of roles and ask them how they got there and tell them that's your plan too - that you're looking for an 'in'.

The best advice I ever got: don't work hard to climb a ladder that you don't want to be at the top of.

In other words, really think about what you REALLY want, then work for that. In my case I wanted family flexibility and travel so I looked for roles that supported that vision.