Sibling age gap

[notinthiseconomy]

I didn't know where to put this, so apologies. And I'm not sure how to word this.

I have a four year old. He will be 5 in April. I was lucky enough to conceive straight away. I had a horrendous pregnancy. I was in hospital multiple times with HG. I hated every single second of it. My mental health was in the toilet.

I wanted to try for number 2 in January 2020. But I was made redundant and then, of course, the pandemic started. Plans were put on hold.

I had been contemplating trying early this year, but with how things are now, that feels irresponsible.

So, we are putting it off again, but potentially our son will be 6-6.5 by the time he has a sibling. Is that a ridiculous age gap?

I know I'm incredibly lucky to have one. I know that. I'm not meaning to be insensitive (hence why I didn't post on the conception board).

That’s a nice age gap which will be easier in you as he will be able to dress and entertain him self at times whilst you see to the new baby.

He most likely won’t have any jealousy or rivalry issues as he will be old enough to understand that a new baby isn’t pushing him out.

Good luck!

Not ridiculous at all. My sister and I have a 3 year age gap and my brother and I have a 12 year age gap. It's never been a problem, we all get in fine and the age doesn't make a difference.
I used to love helping my mum look after my brother when he was a baby. We became very close.
I have a 16 year old a nearly 2 year old and a 9 month old now

Thank you, both.

There are 6 years between me and my eldest brother, but there's another in between. We are all really close.

But then I wonder if I just forget a second all together.

Their is 19 years between my eldest and youngest, they have an amazing bond.

There is 4 years between my first and second child and 10 years between my second and 3rd!
My daughter is the eldest and theres 14 years between her and my 1.5 year old son and she just does her own thing but my 10 year old son and my 1.5 son have a lovely bond! So don’t worry about age gaps! I was worried but it worked out perfect!

My son is 9 this month and baby (if all goes well) is due august. Quite like the thought of a big age gap. He's independent enough to get on etc and once he's older he can be a baby sitter 😂

Thank you, everyone.

Having a pity party and you've made me feel better.

My dd wull be 12.5 when baby no. 2 is born.

It's fine op, all families have different dynamics.

Me and my brother are 10 months apart and not close at all?!

Why do you feel it's irresponsible to have another now?
There's never a prefect time to have a baby, and things can be perfectly normal when you fall pregnant and then you end up giving birth in the middle of a pandemic 😂🤷‍♀️
Life is messy and unpredictable, but it doesn't mean you should stop living the life you want. Good luck with whatever you decide.

I've got 7 years between my eldest and youngest and they share a bedroom. I've also got another in the middle whose 5.5 years older than the youngest. Its hard it's like starting from scratch all over again. When youngest was little it was much easier because they all played together. Then he started to get annoying for them. It's nice though because ds2 looks up to his big brother and ds1 is really good with ds2. Theres also 5.5 years between me and my sibling so being forced to do baby stuff was a bit annoying.
All in all there are pros and cons to both. I wouldn't worry about an age gap though. My dc are now 17,16 and 10 and I would love another but dp says no

@Mommabear20

Why do you feel it's irresponsible to have another now? There's never a prefect time to have a baby, and things can be perfectly normal when you fall pregnant and then you end up giving birth in the middle of a pandemic 😂🤷‍♀️ Life is messy and unpredictable, but it doesn't mean you should stop living the life you want. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Just because I know there's a high chance I'll be poorly again. I'm not saying everyone having a baby now is irresponsible at all (one of my closest friends is pregnant).

I'm just saying I feel I would be knowing my history, knowing the strain the NHS is under. And, selfishly, if I did end up in hospital again I don't want to be alone.

Think about it this way - in families with three children, that would be an entirely normal age gap between the oldest and youngest, and no-one worries about the siblings not getting on in that case.

That's a very good point.

But it's also about starting again when he's more independent.