What to say to neighbours

[Washingpile]

Back story - our neighbours made a lot of noise when they moved in. They were doing up their house so was to be expected. We didn’t complain that it was evenings until 10pm or periods of all day every day for over a year with only a guaranteed break at Christmas etc.

Fast forward a few years and we’ve had lots of occasions where they will start at 8 9 10pm. No time seems to be off limits. A bang on the wall usually gets the message over but it doesn’t stop it happening another day.
We’ve recently realised that it’s not diy anymore. It’s restoration of items for work that they run from home. Last lockdown we couldn’t get away from weeks of sanding and tapping and grinding etc. Either in the garden or indoors. It was awful. Another thing is they seem to knock things against the wall and scrape (I assume) furniture and other strange noises. This has been more recent so I’m thinking they have taken up the carpets or rearranged their furniture recently. Last night this scraping and knocking was still happening after midnight when we were in bed. I’m so tired and really worried they will start up more working from home with the power tools during this lockdown. I’m trying to school 2 kids and husband is working here. I don’t think my mental health can stand anymore. We also can’t enjoy as much time outside this time due to the weather so will be very much stuck in a box with all that noise.
I want to put a note through but don’t know what to say. What would you say? We are not friendly with them at all but we don’t really want to fall out either. If push comes to shove they don’t have planning permission to run a noisy business at home but that’s a last resort.

Thanks everyone. It’s been silent today which is lovely. The business comes in fits and starts. They are certainly not on the bones of their arse. The house is owned not rented and they boasted when they moved in about how cheap our area is compared to where they came from. They had sold somewhere way more expensive to move here. Quite comfortable is the impression I get. We are the paupers who rent - I think they look down at us so don’t think we matter. We’ve said hello a few times and they’ve spoken to us when they need to but mostly they avoid looking when we see them so they don’t have to speak to us.

Agree about speaking to them but don’t worry too much about offending them. Just be careful if you speak to them they don’t charm you into backing down. Stand your ground and be clear about what you want - ask for more than you want and have a bottom line that you will not budge from.

My neighbours have a woodfired hot tub by our fence and I agonised for weeks and in the end texted them about it! In the end they did reduce the use . It was ruining my ability to use my garden. I texted them as I knew they would talk me down in person. I’ve since realised they are selfish wankers and I actually don’t care if they like me or not. So the key thing is thinking about what will work - which in general is being direct , friendly but firm.

Your neighbours are completely out of order .

I had a bit of history with my neighbours blocking my drive as well hence texting. I’d try face to face at first if you can bear it .

Sorry to cluster post it also occurred to me if they own they won’t want a dispute logged with the council as it will affect a future sale. So keep this in your back pocket.

OP if they don't talk to you how would they know you rent?
If you have a problem don't wait until you are boiling point to confront. It won't go well. Right out the issue you have and go speak to them. It doesn't have to be a confrontation.

With regards to the noise, while you’re working up the courage / if they’re unable to completely stop all work within house: the foam fit-together tiles that are used in toddler play areas are fairly effective way of inexpensive soundproofing for the wall that they scrape against - the foam is light so sticks to the walls with adhesive tape. If you find a non-garish colour they can be a decent temporising measure. They dampen the most shrill and rattling parts of the noise which gets on your nerves. Also noise-cancelling earphones or headphones or even DIY ear muffs for a bit of respite.

Noise disturbance, especially the noises which are not regular can be really stressful... especially when nobody else seems to get it.