Don’t worry kids fall into a structure even after a while it will just take some adjusting
It would be such a life saver with another one on the way.
Here is my routine with current 3 year old (I have a 15 month old too):
Morning: jumping on bed while I get ready, toilet, breakfast, teeth a get dressed, alphabets and rhymes, free play and Tv time (while I do quick chores), then go outdoors for a walk (all weathers, and pass by shops!) with a banana and apple and orange in the bag.
Lunch and nap. (12-2.30sh) (reading before nap time). I either get some nap too in here or I finish my housework so I don’t have to multi task when he wakes up. They play freely while I prepare lunch.
Afternoon:
snack (cheese blocks and cucumber /rice cakes, peanut butter/hummus and carrots) while they free play with some ride on toys, some supervised arts and crafts (paint/playdough/glue/sticking), some unsupervised messy play (sand/water in the kitchen sink etc/playdough/cooking with me/music with pots and pans, magnets on the board trying to practice letters and numbers ...) while I do some dinner prep if I didn’t manage during nap time.. then some free play and TV while I do all the packing away .
Evening: dinner then quick game with his dad in his bedroom (puzzle/wrestling/.. ) while I do some more chores, then Bath time, PJs, then milk and story , then bed. (DH doesn’t put him to bed for me else I would have more time here).
It sounds perfect but it’s not. Most days it’s only a
Stuck to by up to 70 percent and I end up missing something out because I’m personally not good with being structured and easily get bored. But quickly am reminded that I get overwhelmed when he doesn’t know what to expect abs go back to it.
Just have a setting for different parts of the day, different types of play.. so that he knows what needs to be done at what time .. abs slowly becomes less dependent on your cues..
It took me a good few months to slowly ease him into this and it reduced the power struggle massively..
He knows now that before morning TV he needs to be dressed, fed, and done some alphabets so he doesn’t feel exasperated when he doesn’t get it.
He knows now that we go out after my chores and he gets to choose whether it’s a scooter or a bike or buggy, and which playground we head to but he knows we are heading out. He knows his only options for snack are banana and apple and oranges.. so there is no point of nagging for a treat.
He knows we come back for lunch.
He knows after lunch he gets to digest a bit by playing in his room then I’m not gonna play with him as it’s his nap time. But he can call me when he is ready for a story whixh onmu happens when he is in his bed.
He knows when he wakes up he won’t get fish fingees and so no need to whine, instead there will be cheese or afternoon snack..
He knows we do arts and crafts after his snack. And that he is Gonna have to let me do some work after for a bit. Abs is welcome to join me with some cooking otherwise he goes to his own kitchen play area.
Etc...
The fact that he “knows” what comes next is the biggest element in reducing his expectations of letting me run around his impulsive wishes and instead we are both following a routine and so it’s not a battle of what I want or what he wants but rather just a house structure that is somewhat agreed and is the standard for both of us to have a good time.
Not in a rigid way. It’s meant to help you and so keep figuring it out until it works around u. But absolutely don’t go around his wishes else you will struggle to tell him no when baby comes